by John Philipp

Member since:
August 10, 2006

Thought~Byte No.166

September 15, 2009 11:54 PM EDT

views: 152 | rating: 10/10 (13 votes) | comments: 75

Thought~Byte No.166

Concept and words by John Philipp. Drawings by Phil Frank.

(The comments below are where the wisdom is found.)

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Tags: thoughtbytes, philosophy, psychology, writing, life, relationships, cartoon, johnphilipp, wwe, ltbrgtlabels, self esteem, self image

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Comments: 75

John Philipp Sep 15, 2009, 11:55pm EDT

Mini Thought~Bytes (words without drawings) appear every day on my Twitter page.

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John Philipp Sep 15, 2009, 11:55pm EDT

Thought~Bytes are posted every Wednesday. To see all Thought~Bytes and get an email when new ones are posted, please join Thought~Bytes

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K D. Sep 15, 2009, 11:59pm EDT

First again! This excitement never ends! HA HA!!

As for the post, I say that we can sometimes be our own worst enemy.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:13am EDT

Some might say we are our only enemy, K D.

And congratulations for being first.

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K D. Sep 16, 2009, 12:00am EDT

Being first on your posts rarely happens to me. I think this is the first time!

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:13am EDT

Double congratulations.

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porshe smith Sep 16, 2009, 12:02am EDT

cute one ,,,, so true

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:13am EDT

Thanks, Porsche.

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Visionaerie B. Sep 16, 2009, 12:12am EDT

I guess it's like George Harrison said, "You don't get time to hang a sign on me!" Yes, that's a pretty hard thing to do. And it's sad when kids get labeled with "ADD" or some other psychological crap. They just need the right whole food inputs like the rest of us, plus love and respect. And why can't we see people's inner beauty, and see beyond the labels? Thanks for posting this.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:15am EDT

Love that quote, Visionaerie. Thanks.

There are a number of Bytes on "labels" because it is such a multi-dimensional issue. Surely, it is sad how some people use them but I think that when we buy into them ourselves that labels do the most damage.

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Linda T. Sep 16, 2009, 12:24am EDT

We can be our own worst enemy like K.D. suggested but we can also be our biggest supporter and motivator.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 5:56am EDT

Good point, Linda. There are positive and negative labels.

Sometimes thinking of ourselves with a positive label can get the "self-fulfilling prophecy thing going for us." Understanding that labels an uni-dimensional and always carry the risk of narrowing our perception.

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JOHN BECK Sep 16, 2009, 12:31am EDT

My reaction to this prompt is muddied by the use of labels in our currently polarized society. The term labels is so tightly tied to bigotry that my mind is distracted from the use of labels on ourselves (myself). Sorry, John.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 5:59am EDT

I understand, John. The media and the mood today exaggerate labels considerably — though I would posit that may make it easier to see their downsides.

With self-labeling I think of examples like "I'm no good at math," "I'm not a
___-er," etc.

JOHN BECK Sep 16, 2009, 7:47am EDT

How damaging!

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 7:51am EDT

Agreed and it's often an "imported"message e.g. from a parent who said that to the child a lot.

Karen E. Sep 16, 2009, 10:32pm EDT

I was a bit the different one in my family and the most common label applied to me was the word "sensitive" It was not used in a complimentary way and I grew up being afraid of my own feelings as if they were inappropriate. It was not until I began to unravel these threads as I grew older that I began to call myself sensitive in a complimentary way. Oh, I know that there is a balance there but I no longer fear the word as much because I found that in that word that always felt like a loathsome label there was a beautiful truth. I am a sensitive person.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 10:48pm EDT

It's an old story, Karen — unfortunately.

Parents passing on their fears to their children. Sometimes very subtly. The fact that yours was more open may have made it easier for you to examine it and make the necessary changes.

Excellent example. Thanks.

JOHN BECK Sep 17, 2009, 7:26am EDT

And today, Karen, you're admired for your sensitivity.

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~Sia McKye~ Sep 16, 2009, 12:44am EDT

Tonight it's the woman who has a love/hate relationship with her computer and is Techie challenged.

Actually, we are harder on ourselves than others could be at times, we talk to ourselves, "What a frickin' idiot you are Sia" I wouldn't let anyone else call me an idiot, or my child...

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 6:00am EDT

Interesting, Sia. We have more tolerance for our own narrow-mindedness and pigeonholing that we do for others'.

~Sia McKye~ Sep 16, 2009, 12:30pm EDT

That's true, John, especially when we talk to ourselves, lol!

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Vivian A. Sep 16, 2009, 12:47am EDT

It is SO hard to ignore oneself. Of course, I have no trouble ignoring others.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 6:01am EDT

I can relate to that, Vivian.

Boy, a bunch of us at a cocktail party would spell certain death :)

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Shaunee C. Sep 16, 2009, 1:03am EDT

Very cute and true

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 6:01am EDT

Thanks, Shaunee.

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Jan S. Sep 16, 2009, 1:05am EDT

Many of us tend to be much harder on ourselves than on others. We use phrases such as "I could have kicked myself...." Do we somehow think it's okay for others to make mistakes, but not for us? Pretty humbling, isn't it?

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 6:02am EDT

Agree, Jan.

And "I could have kicked myself" is a polite denial of the fact that I did kick myself.

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Nancy O. Sep 16, 2009, 2:23am EDT

so true

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 6:03am EDT

Thanks, Nancy.

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Nancy * Sep 16, 2009, 7:10am EDT

Ahh yes to stay the status quo, to be average and go with the flow. I'd rather lable myself anything but those.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 7:52am EDT

How about just not labeling yourself at all? A label is always limiting.

Nancy * Sep 16, 2009, 8:39pm EDT

you are right

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Kushal Poddar Sep 16, 2009, 7:21am EDT

A lebel, if applied by one to his own self, is advirtisement and half truth. My half truth will be "Stupid". I would love to pretend that I am stupid when difficulty mat rise.

The changes

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 7:53am EDT

The "advertisement side" is an interesting facet here, Kushal.

Pretending one is stupid is a very effective tactic — because it's so easy to get people to accept it :)

Kushal Poddar Sep 16, 2009, 7:57am EDT

For me, I do not even have to act.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:11pm EDT

As long as we are on labels, Kushar, I would point out that there is a big difference between "I don't know" and "stupid."

Jennifer aka Jenn B. Sep 16, 2009, 8:46pm EDT

I have found that one of the best responses is "I don't know, but, I will find out and get back with you. "

Jennifer aka Jenn B. Sep 16, 2009, 8:56pm EDT

lol as a matter of fact ...upon reflection...i use that one a lot

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 10:46pm EDT

It makes perfect sense to me, Jenn. I use it a lot too.

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Mary M. Sep 16, 2009, 7:26am EDT

There is so much truth in that simple statement.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 7:54am EDT

Thanks, Mary. An there is always more to a Byte than we see after the first bite.

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Judi F. Sep 16, 2009, 8:47am EDT

We're changing your name to Confuscius, John! This is sooo true.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:12pm EDT

And, ironically, those are often the labels we are least conscious of.

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Dennis Gilman Sep 16, 2009, 11:10am EDT

You are so correct, (again with the l"abelling" thing-three times now) the label we put on ourselves is the most important. Mine is "I'm unique" and I'm very pruod of that label. I chose it very carefully.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:13pm EDT

Dennis, an example of a label with a lot of positive to it.

You will note that every Byte on "labels" focuses on a different aspect. And there are a few more to come.

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Sandre M. Sep 16, 2009, 11:13am EDT

This one reminded me of my favorite quotation about Frank Lloyd Wright, which I put over the desk where I write: "It never occurred to him to put any limitations on himself." The only limits on our imaginations or our capacity for doing good in the world are the ones we manufacture for ourselves.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:14pm EDT

Sandre, when we have groups brainstorm in meetings we ask them to preface everything with the words "I wish..." It is amazing how those two words lift the limitations people tend to put on their thoughts.

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Ruth J. Sep 16, 2009, 11:15am EDT

Let's be spontaneous today and ditch all labels for one day. I don't like labels for individuals or even groups of individuals. Does that make me a "Label Hater"? Gracious--I'm labeled already:)

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:15pm EDT

You're were going so well until the last sentence, Ruth. :)

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Sandi S. Sep 16, 2009, 11:20am EDT

SO TRUE.

Oh... this was liberating!

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:15pm EDT

Glad it was, Sandi.

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Pauline S. Sep 16, 2009, 12:11pm EDT

Self-awareness needed some comedic relief...and with such truth..love it.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 12:16pm EDT

Humor makes the truth go down more easily for some, Pauline.

And also underscores not to take life too seriously.

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Beaker (just Beaker) Sep 16, 2009, 12:59pm EDT

It's a good idea to learn to love yourself, because it's not like you'll be spending much time apart. :-) Even positive labels can be too confining!

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 5:51pm EDT

Amen to both those points, Beaker.

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Bill W. Sep 16, 2009, 4:34pm EDT

John, lighten up!

I think my old psyc book defines beliefs that are manifested by the labels we bestow on ourselves. Beliefs are fundamental to everything we do and avoid doing.

Unfortunately, there are many folks out there who fail to internalize any beliefs and are, therefore prone to wreak havoc on civilization.

Rest easy

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 5:52pm EDT

I agree, Bill, and some of those labels can be (subtly and not so subtly) toxic.

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Sheila Deeth Sep 16, 2009, 5:45pm EDT

Ouch. How very true.

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 5:53pm EDT

Sheila, are you saying that the truth hurts?

(Sorry, couldn't resist.)

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Angela A. Sep 16, 2009, 5:56pm EDT

I never try to label myself. It's a waste of time and energy.
You must be good to yourself. For who else, really will?

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 7:23pm EDT

Good for you, Angela.

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Jeff K. Sep 16, 2009, 7:15pm EDT

Is "Kick me" a label?

John Philipp Sep 16, 2009, 7:23pm EDT

One of the most popular, Jeff.

Though, because the label is on the back, many are not aware they are wearing this.

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blaine d. Sep 17, 2009, 3:25pm EDT

good one!

John Philipp Sep 18, 2009, 12:01am EDT

Thanks, Blaine.

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Georgiana S. Sep 17, 2009, 10:43pm EDT

I guess you could call it 'self-control'!

John Philipp Sep 18, 2009, 12:02am EDT

Clever, Georgee :)

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Vaishnavi K. Sep 18, 2009, 1:23pm EDT

well i cannot agree more... when we say we know somebody we have a very limited knowledge of the person even if we know what the reaction of the person will be to a smallest gesture because we are not them and we cant feel what they mean wen they gv a particular reaction to something.

Whereas when it comes to us we knw evey little detail about everything we do, say, feel....

a longest essay one can write about is oneself

thank you John

John Philipp Sep 18, 2009, 2:33pm EDT

Well stated about our understanding of others, Vaishnavi. Thanks.

I might add that we think we know every little detail about everything we do.

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Robin O. Sep 24, 2009, 8:48am EDT

I fight for kids in school they are trying to label with some disorder usually ADHD, medicate them , and its really an emipemic going on with this. this has been happening
now for at least 25 years. I tell them in the meetings we do not want to put a label on these kids that they will carry the rest of their lives and internalize like something is wrong with them. I reject labels now... at firts I thought oh good, thats what is wrong with me, then I figured it all out.. I no longer internalize any labels.

John Philipp Sep 24, 2009, 10:35am EDT

Good for you, Robin and thanks for sharing this.

This is one aspect of this Byte. Thanks.

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Heidi S. Sep 25, 2009, 8:01am EDT

We notice much more easily the labels we put on others - very seldom (without therapy) do we recognize the ones we put on ourselves - and they do do the most damage.... Great Byte, John.