As many of you know, on 9/13/07, Phil Frank, the cartoonist who drew these Thought~Byte pictures, passed on. He will be missed by all who knew him and enjoyed his 30 plus years of cartoon strips such as Farley and The Elderberries.
For those who haven't read these: An article I wrote saying Goodbye to Phil A Life I'd Jump at
There is a psychological basis for the biblical concept of the sins of the father being visited on the son. This is it. And, I'm sure Phil would appreciate the sentiment of his mates. Good on you John.
This is so true, and as parents we owe it to them to let them become exactly who they are and want to be. Quite often my mom marvels over my daughter saying "She is truly her own person." It's true because we encouraged her to pursue her own interests rather than ours. I wish my mom had done the same.
John I think of it more as a pool of water, retaining an aspect of the learned, yet sometimes distorted. It would probably be better for many children if they could reflect the image away when released from the source.
That's what I like about you John, you're an optimist ;)
until they come to that stage in development when they will say the "opposite" of what they hear their parents say....! ;>
i always compare young children to sponges absorbing all from their environs...and i do believe as we grow into young adulthood and perhaps even later for some, that we are greatly influenced by those we hang with....
That is so true! I assume my son can build the Eiffel Tower out of Lego and that I am only his helpful apprentice. Working out pretty well so far, although we did lose one level, briefly, earlier in the day.
This is not just for parents. I'm around children and I'm not a parent. I have to be careful, too. Those cute little sponges or wierd looking mirors! (:o)
You must have an empty hole in your life because of Phil Frank. The cartoon brings forth a big frustration of parents dropping off their children for Sunday school then picking them up an hour later to go home. Then they say, "Why isn't the church growing?" Or "why do our youth quit after graduating from Sunday School?"
The best thing we can ever do for our children is set an example. I realized that when my son was very young and it suddenly struck me that controlling him was not the goal. The goal was empowering him to release his potential. I wasn't a very good role model but he seems to have turned out okay in spite of me!
Children are a reflection of the parents. That is why parents need to watch what they say and do around children. My 19 year old is having to learn this now with a 5 1/2 month old.
This is so true John. My oldest daughter is a veterinarian and the youngest is a self employed interior decorator and both are work-a-holics, just like their mother. It saddens me but they are sweet, sensitive and loving. I just wish they would take more time for themselves. That's why I put them through college, so they wouldn't have to work themselves into an early grave. Dang, I messed up!
I am your child Wherever you go, you take me too Whatever I know, I learned from you Whatever I am, you taught me to be I am your child
Hi John, you ever hear Barry Manilow sing that song? He did a guest appearance on Murphy Brown in 199? where he sang it. It's a bit humbling... your reflection cartoon, it's important to remember though.......
Vivian, I like the pool of water metaphor very much - it contains reflection, absorption and distortion — all of which undoubtedly go on as a child's personality develops.
I am an optimist, I guess. The other day I read there are glass half-full and glass half empty people. Then there are those who say "the glass is too big."
Hi, Gayle. When children say "the opposite" I believe that's a testing phase.
You are right, recent studies show children's personalities are more influenced by people outside the home, but I would say what they experienced in the home early may well determine who they interact with and how they interact outside the home.
So true, John. That's why whenever one of mine falls -- and I know they aren't really hurt -- the first thing they'll do is look up into my face to see my reaction.
If I say something like, "Oh that little fall on your heinie was nothing," and I laugh, they'll laugh right along with me.
But, if I look frightened or serious, they see it and they start to cry. Children know, and they respond accordingly.
:) Nice thought. But they have little personalities and brains of their own and if they think what your doing is wrong, they will go way off of that - even to the opposite. So your children can also be the polar opposite of you or your photo negative.
They can, Denise, and I think a lot of what you model still has power.
Segregation in the South was a good example. When everyone a child looked up to - parents, teachers, town officials - considered Black Americans inferior, is it any wonder the kids accepted that and why it is taking so long to adjust those attitudes?
I've had this discussion with others--why do some kids with the same advantages fail to live up to their potential? With my own, I trusted and believed in them, and I hope they always did the same with me.
I've been privy to a number of corporate Founder Studies. Walt Disney and Steve Jobs, heads of two of the most innovative American companies, were both autocratical and didn't always exhibit the best of what is considered good motivational behavior.
But Jobs and Disney had something else thing in common: They both believed that their people could accomplish tasks the people thought were impossible. It was the sincere expectations from their boss about what they knew they could accomplish that empowered them to do the "impossible."
Every generation mirrors its predecessor in some way but so often children are walking, talking automatons of their parents with opinions they adopted rather than forming their own. Some people never bother to develop things for themselves and cling to the familial credo long after there is no truth in it. Hopefully there is more opportunity to develop self these days and less chance to cling to their unproved credo.
Indeed true. They will not necessarily be or do as you say, so much as to become more like you as they grow older. They will internalise the things they admire in their parents and these qualities will gradually become apparent.
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For those who haven't read these:
An article I wrote saying Goodbye to Phil
A Life I'd Jump at
And the final The San Francisco Chronicle article (Tuesday 1/1/08) about their long time cartoonist.
Bidding final farewell to cartoonist Phil Frank
And, I'm sure Phil would appreciate the sentiment of his mates. Good on you John.
That's a good way to look at this.
That's what I like about you John, you're an optimist ;)
until they come to that stage in development when they will say the "opposite" of what they hear their parents say....! ;>
i always compare young children to sponges absorbing all from their environs...and i do believe as we grow into young adulthood and perhaps even later for some, that we are greatly influenced by those we hang with....
good one and thx for the head's up mail...
cheers,gayle
Proverbs 22:6
--------------------------------------
Crap John, you're keeping me up. In five hours I have to drive to Houston.
Wherever you go, you take me too
Whatever I know, I learned from you
Whatever I am, you taught me to be
I am your child
Hi John, you ever hear Barry Manilow sing that song? He did a guest appearance on Murphy Brown in 199? where he sang it. It's a bit humbling... your reflection cartoon, it's important to remember though.......
They are right on for this. Thanks.
I am an optimist, I guess. The other day I read there are glass half-full and glass half empty people. Then there are those who say "the glass is too big."
When children say "the opposite" I believe that's a testing phase.
You are right, recent studies show children's personalities are more influenced by people outside the home, but I would say what they experienced in the home early may well determine who they interact with and how they interact outside the home.
Hmm, Barney. That's intriguing.
Probably true as part of the equation because that's not all they are.
Children have no choice: the imitate what you model.
Cats do it on purpose.
If I say something like, "Oh that little fall on your heinie was nothing," and I laugh, they'll laugh right along with me.
But, if I look frightened or serious, they see it and they start to cry. Children know, and they respond accordingly.
Thanks.
Segregation in the South was a good example. When everyone a child looked up to - parents, teachers, town officials - considered Black Americans inferior, is it any wonder the kids accepted that and why it is taking so long to adjust those attitudes?
I've been privy to a number of corporate Founder Studies. Walt Disney and Steve Jobs, heads of two of the most innovative American companies, were both autocratical and didn't always exhibit the best of what is considered good motivational behavior.
But Jobs and Disney had something else thing in common: They both believed that their people could accomplish tasks the people thought were impossible. It was the sincere expectations from their boss about what they knew they could accomplish that empowered them to do the "impossible."