by Kushal Poddar

Member since:
January 19, 2008

sun on the guard's gun

November 03, 2009 08:55 PM EST

views: 237 | comments: 85

To one who hates criticism

The only performance beyond

any offer of betterment

lies there in peace. Quiet dead.

snippet

Sun touches

the rifle of the guard.

It becomes

a dewdrop.

haiku

sun on the guard’s gun

dewdrops evaporate

from his shoes

Tags: poetry, poem, kushal poddar, philosphy, verse, impressionism

To Groups: Thirteen Blackbirds Poetry Review, Be weird Be Different Enjoy Yourself, Poems In The Sand, Gather Slackers, Gather County Correctional, Poetry and Metaphysical Thoughts, Autumn Beauty, Artistic Minds®, .....The Writers Review....., GatherGroup, Poetic License, Gather Non-Deleters Group, Poets and Writers, The Sandbox, Salud, Art Ambrosia, .....on Gather, birdsongs, One Article at a time, SHINE! Flash Writers!, Friends of Lewis Knight, ! 2009 Gather Archive !, Endless points, Let's Write a Poem, !!! GatherWriMo - Gather's National Novel Writing Month Group !!!, ***The Elsie Duggan, Matriarch of Gather, Fan Club***, Gandhi, Man of the Millennium, .....The Bloggers Review....., !! ~*~ Insane Asylum ~*~ !!, Art and Literary Enthusiasts, Grass Roots Writing, The Sound Of Poetry Review, Our Soul Journey, Aunt Annie's Arbitrary Articles, Videos & Pretty Pictures, GATHER GROUP E-MAIL UNLIMITED!!!!, The Unsecret Society, Old Hippie's Corner, Dream Depths, !!! The World Is Crazy !!!, ! Points *Wizards* of the Universe !, The Open Journal, Poems From Dark Corners Of The Soul, A Course in Miracles, Poetry Salon, Our Dreams At Night (Post Any thing), thought provoking, 3 for All Who Enter!, B-kuz I Kan!, Article Adoption Group, Gather Your Photos, Pen & Publish, Thepoetscircle, The Wordman Thomas Has Spoken - All Poetry And Fiction Writing All The Time, A Dollar Makes me holler, Friday Spirits, Honest Poetry Critique, Orange Juice, The Surreal Circus, Poetic Release, A group 4 POINTS, The Altar Guild, originalpoetryaspirants, Poetry on Death, Gather it All and Share it with Your Friends, ! ~~20 Comments~~ !, The Writers Stop, Bards and Sages, At This Exact Moment, Brotherhood of Poets, Poetry By Us, :o) {Say What?} (o:, Gather Explorers, testing123, Happy Gathering, Poet's Passion, The Esoteric and Alternative, for Harmony, ! 44 by 4400 Group !, The Way to the Heart, Write from the Heart, Journal Journey's, Poetic expressions, Anything everything 24-7, Gather Broadcasting, Poetry for today, Poets Nook, poetrygroup, PoetryCity Group, Poetry Forever, As we gather to share, Hometown News, Poetry to Hang on Trees, *Deep Dark wine(A toast to life), Our Memorys, !! ~*~ Show Me the Points ~*~ !!, Artists United, Art Symbolism, Poetry Slam, Please Share, Poetry Nation, Nature Poetry, The Writers, Poets, New and Old, Pains and Gains, Poet's Weekly Muse, LOOK!!!!!!! (POST ALL), Real Friends of Tommy Wallach, Poetry Express, 50 Views Per Content, GATHER FAVES, Our Neighborhood, That's life, *Passionate Poetry*, Poetry of the Obscure, Talk Nerdy to Me, **Let's Get Together~ Post anything!**, .....The Poetry Review....., One Hundred Comments, !!! GatherJournal !!!, 2009: All things created in '09, Gather humane society, Gather Writing Life, As The Points Turn, Poems With Passion, *Haiku Poetry 4 Us*, Gather Authors, Articles Galore, Oops Silly Me!, 'Twas Brillig Jabberwocky Nonsense, & I Liked It Little Chipmunks!!!, The Triple Name Club, Think About This, Simply Fabulous!, The Time Capsule--Pass on Stories for Future Generations, Redneck Gals Lovin Redneck Guys, Short Story and More!, PoetryTagGroup, Everyday Life - What is on your Mind? Post it ALL here!, Art - Any Medium, Gather Writing Essential, Tall Tales, Ron B, Internatural Man of mastery, FAN CLUB for an all around good guy., !!! ViewMasters !!!, friends~n~needofViews, Poetry Gazebo, Hot Topics, "Crapzilla" for ALL the crap you ever wanted to publish, just keep it clean!, THE WHATEVER GROUP, Snippets

recommend this

link to this page

Bookmark this post:

Comments: 85

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 8:57pm EST

hee hee...gimme minute...I'll post my new one.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:01pm EST

I have read it and commented. It is a real good poem.

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:15pm EST

you said you loved trees ;)

reply to this comment

Franklin Newman Nov 3, 2009, 8:57pm EST

If one doesn't change, they are dead already.

Interesting concept with the dewdrops. Is it pure water, or something worse?

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 8:59pm EST

that's what I was wondering. you're right about the change. one has to change to survive.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:03pm EST

It is a moment. A natural beauty juxtaposed the gun. Yesterday I wrote these two on the same image of a guard at High Court.

Franklin Newman Nov 3, 2009, 9:07pm EST

Amazing how you can draw inspiration from just what you observe. It's a great gift.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:12pm EST

Your gift of writing drama is not with me.

reply to this comment

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 8:59pm EST

1st one interesting...love the snippet!

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:05pm EST

Meoww.

reply to this comment

David W. Nov 3, 2009, 9:01pm EST

Your last two pieces reminds me of a photo from the sixtiees. It was national guard soldier holding his rifle at present arms and there was a flower int he barrel.

In China during the short lived revolution it was the lone student standing in front of the tank.

Grand thoughts is short poems.

Tears on a rifle indeed.

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:03pm EST

I would've loved to see that photo. tears. I could never see myself holding a gun and shooting to kill.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:05pm EST

The idea was used in a watch company's advirtisement once. The caption was, "A time for peace"
Thank you for this wonderful comment.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:06pm EST

Dawn, keyboard is mightier than guns

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:07pm EST

you're right.

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:08pm EST

pen and paper also.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:11pm EST

like the postmen, the pen and paper are fast fading. Alas

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:11pm EST

I agree. one could always get a lot of inspiration from a postman's daily routine.

Roger B. Nov 4, 2009, 12:17pm EST

It's funny David, that photo of the National Guardsman with the daisy placed in the barrel of his rifle is the first impression I got too. It was a young "hippie" girl who placed the flower there. This took place on a college campus at a ROTC recruiting office. If memory serves, this was shortly before the Kent State debacle. Sad, tumultuous times.........., the memories you trigger..........

-R.

Roger B. Nov 4, 2009, 12:19pm EST

Don't get me wrong Kushal, I liked it my friend.

-R.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 9:41pm EST

I know and I loved your comment.

reply to this comment

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:12pm EST

Paper
and ball point pen.
Fading so very fast
along with the lonely postman.
Alas.

butterfly cinquain.

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:13pm EST

like death of a salesman...death of a postman.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:19pm EST

You must post it. This is bringing the poet in you like never before.

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:24pm EST

I did. inspired by you ;)

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:33pm EST

You just inspired me this:
postmen
never retires;
their subconscious carries
moments beyond just this life.
Timeless

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:40pm EST

love it! post it =D

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 3, 2009, 9:44pm EST

can't wait =D my my...I'm full of carrots, must be a wabbit =P

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 4, 2009, 1:23am EST

my bad....my above poem is a cinquain but not a butterfly cinquain. a cinquain is 2-4-6-8-2. a butterfly cinquain is 2-4-6-8-2-8-6-2.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 5:58am EST

Another thing I might mention with permission that we two have written perfect Crapsey's cinquains

Dawn (a kitty-kin on the wall) Nov 4, 2009, 9:41am EST

never heard of crapsey's. what is crapsey's?

reply to this comment

Austin Cushing Nov 3, 2009, 9:33pm EST

This comment is to let you know that this content has reached at least ten comments, and as such has been removed from Comment Speedway! Congratulations!

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 9:33pm EST

thanks

reply to this comment

JOHN BECK Nov 3, 2009, 9:56pm EST

I like the symbolism as well as the sounds of the words.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 10:01pm EST

Thank you John

reply to this comment

(Jasper,(Disciple for Christ. w. Nov 3, 2009, 10:02pm EST

Thanks Kushal this is great.

Kushal Poddar Nov 3, 2009, 10:07pm EST

Thanks Jasper.

reply to this comment

Georgiana S. Nov 3, 2009, 10:10pm EST

I keep seeing that famous life Magasine pic from the 60s of a flower in a gun barrel!

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 5:59am EST

Thank you Georgiana

reply to this comment

Cheryl W. Nov 3, 2009, 10:18pm EST

Brilliant as always, Kushal!

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:20am EST

Thank you cheryl.

reply to this comment

Annmarie B. Nov 3, 2009, 10:28pm EST

Thank you Kushal for your wonderful writings.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:33am EST

Thank you

reply to this comment

Ruthi C. Nov 3, 2009, 11:11pm EST

Criticism, constructively lent, is a breath of life.

I thought of blood, sweat, and tears with the heat of the sun shining on your guard and his gun.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:34am EST

Thank you ruthi.

reply to this comment

sandi p. Nov 3, 2009, 11:27pm EST

I do not know what a snippet is but good post.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:34am EST

Thank you Sandi

reply to this comment

Allen H. Nov 4, 2009, 1:12am EST

On ANZAC Day my son
carries the guard's gun
dewdrops evaporate from his shoes
He stands proud in the sun at attention
He will not Faint. He will not lose.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:21am EST

I just read your post. Beautiful. Thanks.

reply to this comment

Vinod Sailes Nov 4, 2009, 1:42am EST

Very excellent poems Kushal. Simple and cute but pointed, in fact like the rifle. Thanks.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:33am EST

Thanks Vinod

reply to this comment

Mark N. Nov 4, 2009, 1:50am EST

Kushal I have yet to understand one of your poems, my wife tells me their great.
Featured on Grass Roots Writing
with many thanks Kushal
Mark

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 5:58am EST

Thank you to you and your wife.

reply to this comment

Purrrrrrrrrrr~Genki dashite~Nantoka naru-yo! S. Nov 4, 2009, 8:34am EST

melancholy grays in rain~

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:41pm EST

Interestingly said Purr

reply to this comment

Purrrrrrrrrrr~Genki dashite~Nantoka naru-yo! S. Nov 4, 2009, 8:34am EST

Thank you for posting to GutterGirls~

reply to this comment

Kathryn E. Nov 4, 2009, 10:04am EST

i love the image of the sun on the guard's shoes.......

Featured in the Triple Name Club.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:42pm EST

Thank you kathy.

postman revisited

reply to this comment

Chas Andrews Nov 4, 2009, 11:10am EST

okay...

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:42pm EST

Thanks

reply to this comment

Chris Brockman Nov 4, 2009, 11:22am EST

Re "To one who hates criticism": that's why every piece of writing is a work in progress, just as life is.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:43pm EST

True.

postman revisited

reply to this comment

Holly C. Nov 4, 2009, 11:27am EST

You capture so much beauty and emotion is so few words. Excellent pieces.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:43pm EST

Thank you Holly.

postman revisited

reply to this comment

Richard B. Nov 4, 2009, 1:26pm EST

nice

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:46pm EST

thanks Richard

reply to this comment

Sharon P. Nov 4, 2009, 2:15pm EST

When the gun fires
Time stands still
Pauses as the sound
and recoil shake loose the dew drops.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:46pm EST

beautiful Sharon

Sharon P. Nov 5, 2009, 11:01am EST

Thank you Kushal.

reply to this comment

amy r. Nov 4, 2009, 2:43pm EST

I love it, sometimes few words are stated best, better than many words. Great material!

Robert - just a simple man - B. Nov 4, 2009, 4:40pm EST

In A Few Words: Veteran's Day

Remember Our Troops & Veterans

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:47pm EST

Thank you Amy.

postman revisited

amy r. Nov 5, 2009, 11:23pm EST

Your welcome!

reply to this comment

blaine d. Nov 4, 2009, 4:37pm EST

great one's!

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:48pm EST

thanks blaine

reply to this comment

Robert - just a simple man - B. Nov 4, 2009, 4:38pm EST

First one's best; both are cool. I want to steal your title. Going to let me?

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:50pm EST

I am glad that you are stealing it.

postman revisited

Robert - just a simple man - B. Nov 4, 2009, 9:38pm EST

I take that as a yes, and I'm thinking a Guatanamo connection. Stay tuned.

reply to this comment

Granny Janny H. Nov 4, 2009, 7:17pm EST

I love them all, Kushal.

Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:50pm EST

Thank you Janny.

reply to this comment

Adrian Eve Revenaugh Nov 4, 2009, 11:54pm EST

Look at the turn out Poet Ku!
You have created a fine following. These were interesting. The two about the sunlight, dewdrop and the guards gun and shoes took on such different meanings by the rearranged order of words.
The commentary on criticism is especially pertinent for those of us wanting to hone whichever creative craft we pursue. But, I must confess, I'm not sure I got the message that you intended. Would peace represent being alright with the extended offer of how one might better a work? What of quiet dead?