Letter to My 16-Year-Old Self

I heard a song on the radio tonight about a man writing a letter to his 17-year-old self and it got me to thinking about what I would write.  That got me to thinking about what others would write.  So, I'm going to try to start something here.  I'm going to write a letter to my teen self and then pick three folks I'd like to see do the same.  If you folks would write a letter and pick 3 others, I bet we would see a lot of interesting letters.  So....here goes:

Dearest young lady,

I was thinking about what I would tell you if I could talk to you today.  You are at the beginning of your life and because of my unique position, being your 52-year-old self, I thought I'd write and pass on a bit of information that might make your life more fun, safer, and happier.  I know you won't take all of my advice, because you tend to hate it when someone tells you what to do, but please at least consider what I say.

First of all, I love you.  You are so awesome!  It amazes me, now, that you don't see your many talents and gifts.  Your body, though you are a gymnast, is not the best it will ever be.  You will continue to stay active, you'll dance, play volleyball, and continue to do gymnastics and as you finish growing, your body will continue to develop and become even more efficient.  But, I know that when you look in the mirror, you don't even see it as good.  You see yourself as fat because of that feminine pooch in your tummy.  If I could give you a gift, I'd give you my vision of your bod.  I'd love to have your strength and control.  I'd love to have your shape and size.  You don't see the strength or the shape.  Do you recognize how sharp your mind is??  How often have you been told by teachers that you are way above average in intelligence.  Yet you don't believe them.  You think they are being kind.  They aren't.  They are telling you the truth.   You don't really hear the compliments you receive.  Is part of that because of the missed opportunities in the past?  Have you begun to believe those who would keep you down?  Please don't.  If you missed an opportunity because your folks didn't hold up their end of the deal or because you sacrificed an opportunity to care for an abandoned niece, that doesn't mean you don't deserve opportunities now and in the future.  Reach out and take what you deserve. 

Admire your body and realize what a gift it is.  You might also loosen up a bit.  I know you are afraid of being like your mom and sisters and having guys use you purely for "a good time."  But, you know what????  There are some good guys out there and opening your heart to one doesn't mean you have to sleep with him.  A little kissing now and then doesn't mean you are a whore.  Do you realize that the folks who are telling you that are the ones who sleep with any guy that comes along???  Stop listening to the critics and start listening to your heart.  Have a little fun along the way.  All those evenings you spend in your room, crying from loneliness are your emotions way of telling you that you need to make contact.  Set some standards, of course, but then get out and reach out.  Open your heart to love, even if it is puppy love.

Now, when it comes to finding the guy, stop worrying about finding a guy the family will cherish and find guys who will cherish you.  I know your heart and I know that you will cherish a guy who finds you fascinating.  So, stop worrying about how they will look when you bring them home and start worrying about what they see in you that tells them you are incredible.  When you find someone like that, let him tell you.  Then, reach out, take his hand, and learn about the mysteries of the physical when it is mixed with the emotional. 

Lastly, trust your heart.  You have spent 16 years worrying about "doing it right."  But, soon, there will be some opportunities in your life that others will tell you are not meant for you because you have to be good.  You have to be better than others who would take those opportunities.  Guess what...You know those folks you know who are following their heart and you think you will end up better off than them?  I'm here to tell you that you all end up pretty much the same.  You are going to meet someone and recognize in him "the one."  And, you are going to lose him.  Don't drown in the loss and don't be afraid to go after him.  Don't worry about "what's right" at that point.  This loss will be like being on a cruise ship as it approaches your destination.  You can see your destiny from far off, but if you jump ship because you feel you have loss your destination when it's covered by a cloud bank, you will drown.  Hang in there.  Believe with all your heart that you deserve the best now and in the future.  Because you deserve the best, if you tell the universe what you want and then go after it, it will be yours.  Sure, you have to feel the initial loss.  We all have pain.  But, don't lose sight of what you want.  And, believe that you will get what you really want.  If you do this, you will know love and pleasure in life.  You will know some hardship and sadness too, but it will be buffered by the love you have known. 

Have fun with your life when you can.  I can tell you that you will be a good mom, so don't stress too much about that.  You will bring happiness to many friends.  Demand respect from your family and take a good hard look at who they really are before you feel too bad about their negative judgments.  Instead, listen to your heart.  You know yourself best, so trust your own judgment.  You won't always be right, but you'll regret the bad decisions you make less and enjoy the good decisions more. 

Remember, kiddo, the scripture says "Love your neighbor as yourself."  That means you have to start by loving you. 

I know I do.

See you in 36 years!

Now, for the 3 I would like to hand off to:

Bunnicula Board

Vincent di fondi

Berf