by Nancy N.
Member since:
October 6, 2007

Words of Healing, Words of Fun, The Joy of Words NWJC Writing Discussion #76

July 25, 2009 10:38 AM EDT (Updated: July 25, 2009 12:15 PM EDT)
views: 127 | comments: 99



Recently I found myself hunting for a Sympathy card for a dear friend of mine whose husband had passed away. They are both lifelong Agnostics and I scoured the stores for a card that went along with their beliefs.  Finally I found one by Hallmark. It was beautiful, it said so much in so few words:

“As time passes and the pain fades away, the memories and love will remain in your heart - especially the love. “

It got me thinking about words and how very healing they can be which led me to jingles and a memory of a trip I took years ago with a friend. I remember it was a very long and boring drive and we kept seeing the road sign: DO NOT PASS WHEN THE YELLOW LINE IS IN YOUR LANE. We started humming and then made up this jingle:

Do not pass when the yellow line's in your lane, baby

Do not pass when the yellow line's in your lane,

Do not pass, take your foot off the gas,

Take a little time and save your a**,

Do not pass when the yellow line's in your lane.

It’s funny, I don’t remember where we were going, but I remember singing that jingle in the car and laughing. It certainly helped to make a long boring ride fun and laughter always feels good.

I’ve also noticed how the words coming from the advertising industry also pick up on the different seasons. One of my new favorite ads this summer is for Home Depot, it begins: “Let’s take a spin around the color wheel….” That actually makes painting sound fun.

Anyway, I wanted to follow through with Pat’s theme of summertime, which to me is a time for doing projects, taking vacations, having cookouts and lighthearted easy living. I decided to throw this out to you in the hopes that you’ll share some of your favorite jingles, verses, word play, etc.

I’m looking forward to reading your “Fun Words”, or anything else you want to discuss. So, what are your writing concerns? What writing activities have you been involved with this week? Did you have any successes, breakthroughs, realizations? How have you replenished your creative wells? Did you treat your senses?

Let’s talk.

 

The group No Whine, Just Champagne will meet here at this article for a live discussion about **** on July 30, 2009 at 9:00pm ET. I hope you will stop by. At least this time you cannot use the excuse that we don't talk about what you want to talk about!

Here’s a site for some of the old advertising jingles:

www.tvparty.com/comjing.html

　

Here’s a link to selling your verses to Greeting Card Companies: http://www.howtoadvice.com/GreetingCards



Comments: 99

Pat Bertram Jul 29, 2009, 10:38pm EDT
I'm looking forward to seeing what everyone has to say tomorrow night!
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 8:59pm EDT
Welcome everyone. Since I posted this article I got to thinking how jingles are some times used in books. With the psychotic killer reciting a jingle in an ominous way to build suspense, to the victim having a jingle in their head to try to stave off fear. It could be the same jingle, yet representing opposite states of mind.
Or just the one liner's we're so familiar with (Heeeeere's Johnny) What are some of your favorite jingles from movies?
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:01pm EDT
From movies? I'll have to think about that for a minute. I didn't know it was going to be on the test, so I didn't study for it.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:03pm EDT
About the only movie I've seen recently was Mamma Mia, and I do not want to start thinking about it -- I finally got the dang songs out of my head!
Jill Lynn A. Jul 30, 2009, 9:05pm EDT
I didn't think of a jingle when I read your article, but I did think of the word "redrum" What a play on a word(s) that was!
Angela A. Jul 30, 2009, 9:07pm EDT
The one jingle from a movie that has stuck in my mind all these years, is the one from the Nightmare on Elm Street movies.
The one where they sing,
One, two Freddie's coming for you..
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:07pm EDT
I know a lot of characters in movies have tag lines -- something they repeat throughout the film, but I can't think of any off hand.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:07pm EDT
Okay, the same with rhymes and jingles. How about the Joker and Riddler in the Batman movies? Pretty interesting characters.
Angela A. Jul 30, 2009, 9:08pm EDT
How about, "I'll be back."? From the Terminator.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:09pm EDT
Angela must have been hi~jacked . . .
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:08pm EDT
I love Freddie, Angela, he "plays" while he's doimg all that evil stuff, singing jingles and being so crazy, insane happy.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:12pm EDT
One of my all-time favorite lines is from The Shining -- when Jack Nicholson is backing Shelley Duvall up the stairs. "Wendy? Darling? Light, of my life. I'm not gonna hurt ya. You didn't let me finish my sentence. I said, I'm not gonna hurt ya. I'm just going to bash your brains in."

It's not exactly a jingle, but I get a kick out of that.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:12pm EDT
I've noticed sometimes authors will run a line or two throughout a novel numerous times, like "The Lonely watch life pass by, and dream their dreams within the lie of life around them." Something like that, but it runs throughout the book.
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:13pm EDT
Hi, I'm new to the group.

I'm stuck on the Mom-brain syndrome. Can't think of any movie jingles but I am forever coming up with improve jingles with the four year old to help her remember rules and just because she has a sinister mind and likes to come up with interesting ideas. Like the one I use pretty much every day, "when I'm three I stay near Mommy, when I'm four I can go just a tiny bit more."
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:14pm EDT
I've tried the catch phrase thing in my writing. I don't think I came up with anything good because it just sounds corny to me.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:15pm EDT
Hi, L.V. Do you want us to call you L.V. or Lori?
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:15pm EDT
OH - I almost forgot, I might use this in a book some time: True story: A friend and I were at a very pricey gourmet restaurant, dressed to the nines. The waiter wore a tux and the room was crystal chandeliers, candles, china, etc. Very swanky. We ordered Duck and when the waiter brought it he commented:
"Finger lickin' good..." and cracked up.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:16pm EDT
I've tried using catch phrases, too, but the only ones I kept were for a humorous character, so the silliness fit. And I needed catch phrases to tell the characters apart. I had so many of them!
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:16pm EDT
Hi LV, I like that jingle, it's a good way to learn.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:19pm EDT
I like verses in a novel when they are romantic and it's thoughts one character is having about the other.
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:21pm EDT
Hi Pat, everybody.

You can call me Lori. The initials is just what I'm using for a pen name.

Thanks Nancy, it sure seems to help for the little one. I think she's actually better at coming up with them than I am.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:21pm EDT
Hi ALL ~ I'm here (a little late) and reading...
Beth H. Jul 30, 2009, 9:22pm EDT
One of my favorite commercial jingles is the Coke song, I'd like to Teach the World to Sing. Hearing it always makes me smile. Actually, most of the old Coke ads were great.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:25pm EDT
If I were a cat
I'd tiptoe through the house
and everynight I'd catch a rat
or scare away a mouse
The jingle played in the killer's head as he followed Joey LaBone, State's witness and King of the Rats... (Silly or could be made effective, what do you think?)
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:27pm EDT
Hi Rene, Hi Beth, I love that jingle too.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:30pm EDT
Hi Nancy. Nice to meet you. I'm all caught up now . . .
Beth H. Jul 30, 2009, 9:28pm EDT
Jingles, tag lines, pet phrases can all work for our stories and characters. But they can be overplayed too. Nothing worse than reading the same words out of a character's mouth.
James R. Jul 30, 2009, 9:29pm EDT
My reaction to catchphrases and greeting cards is, I can do that. I find many of the greeting cards are overly sentimental, so I like to personalize the greeting to the person and the occasion. I've been using a card making program for years and also include lots of my own digital photos.

In a novel or story, I'll sometimes deliberately repeat a motif. Usually it starts by accident, but can then be elaborated upon. For example, I once wrote a story here at Gather that made repeated use of a flower motif. One of the reviewers summed it up by saying: "A flower runs through it." Yep, that's about it.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:31pm EDT
James ~ That's rather UNIQUE . . . "A flower runs through it." ~ I like it.
Jill Lynn A. Jul 30, 2009, 9:45pm EDT
Hey, I think that was me who said that, James. Ha. It was the story that started in the train station, right?
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:08pm EDT
Hi Jill!
James R. Jul 30, 2009, 10:36pm EDT
Jill -- full disclosure -- that was your comment. And it did start at a train station. The story had a word limit, so lots of it got editing out -- but the flowers stayed in.
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:30pm EDT
It's those oldies that sometimes come back to haunt you. And yeah, "I'm stuck on band aides because Bandaide brand is stuck on me."
Deborah J Ledford Jul 30, 2009, 9:30pm EDT
Jingles sometimes get stuck in my head--but rarely do I remember the product they're advertising.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:32pm EDT
Hi Deb ~ Love the new ICON.
Deborah J Ledford Jul 30, 2009, 10:06pm EDT
Thanks Rene! This is cover of my upcoming thriller.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:12pm EDT
I love the COVER. It is now on my "MUST READ" List.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:33pm EDT
If you do use a tag phrase, it has to be at the appropriate time to make an impact. I just thought of something -- I wonder if a killer or a hero could have a tag line that means one thing at the beginning of the book, and at the end is used in a completely different way. Perhaps used inappropriately, so that it becomes humorous? Like "I'll be back." It wasn't humorous in the terminator, but in other movies it's used as a bit of humor. I wonder if you could do the same thing but in the context of a single book?
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:35pm EDT
Greeting cards seem to come in three types. 1. The overly mushy-gushy that fits almost no one I know, 2. The one liner I'm not really going to say anything because I don't want to, and 3. The I'm going to insult you because that's what I think is funny and I don't want to sent something mushy-gushy or the almost blank one liner.

Sorry Hallmark, there there are a lot of in-betweeners that want a nice card that isn't full of flowers and purfume, is humorous without insulting, and says more than "yeah it's your birthday".
Beth H. Jul 30, 2009, 9:37pm EDT
Pat, that would be a satisfying use of words, to twist them in that manner. I'm guessing it's been done, but I can't recall anything now.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:37pm EDT
Interesting ideas and I thought it might be fun to have a character who likes to talk in verse, or who answers with jingles. I think I read a novel like that one time, it was a street person named the Prophet and I think he's in Andrew Vachss novel, it was really good, really well done.
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:38pm EDT
I've tried the catch phrase in the first novel I tried writing. Going back and looking at it now it seems just as lame, but it's probably just a really bad catch phrase. It was also supposed to be the one thing that might help clue the reader in to who the real killer is before he gives himself away too much. I think I need my four year old to work on a better catch phrase than the one I came up with.

Then again, would the absurdity of how bad a catch phrase is be the very thing that makes it work?
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:38pm EDT
I might be taking a turn here in this conversation, but I wanted to touch on something that Nancy has in the INTRO to this Chat . . .

How have you replenished your creative wells? and "What writing activities have you been involved with this week?"

Usually writing poetics is the way that I replenish my creative well, and it is also a writing activity that I am involved with continually. How about everyone else?
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:41pm EDT
Okay ~ Going to make some coffee ...
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:46pm EDT
I'm not sure about replenishing the creative well, but replenishing the wine glass sometimes helps. Oops, sorry, did I bring wine to the "No Whine" group?

But really, when the well runs dry I try to turn to other things. Like some other things, ideas can come in strange places, like the pea gravel at the playground in the hands of a devious little four year old (and that is a book for another day).

While taking a small breather from hacking off the ending of my nearly finished novel with a large axe, I have been working on typing in the pages of a half finished novel I started years ago (by pen, then typewriter) complete with the antagonists catch phrase and eliminating one of the protagonists catch phrases (which was equally bad, if not worse).
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:48pm EDT
L.V. ~ Now that was a GOOD ONE! ~ wine in the "No Whine" group ~ l o l ~ cute.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:43pm EDT
It replenishes me too, Rene. When I start thinking in symbols it seems to relax my brain and open a creative pathway. Sometimes my words get too much in the way.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:49pm EDT
I was serious Nancy ~ It's Hazelnut Creme ~ and I needed to wake up . . .
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:44pm EDT
Nancy ~ I find "symbols" very interesting, but I never thought about using them to relax my brain ~ L O L. I'm going to try that!
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:45pm EDT
Lori I really think there is a place for silly and absurd in my novels. Aren't we all silly and absurd at times and things around us are like that occasionally.
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:48pm EDT
Life would just be too boring without a little absurdity and sillyness (and I admit I am guessing on the spelling here).

I find a little humor in a tight situation brings those macabre scenes a little closer to being believable. Who doesn't give a little nervous giggle on occassion?
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:52pm EDT
That is so TRUE Nancy. Silly and absurd is the order of the day as far as I can tell in the drama~filled world of ours. I'd say it is more like Twilight Zonish to be honest with you. [And, I made that "Zonish" word up just now...I like to do that from time to time...make up words].
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:58pm EDT
L V ~ I'm with you on the Life would be boring without a little absurdity and silliness (or is it sillyness?) ~ and TRUST ME, I run into it everyday ~ even when I'm trying my best to be SERIOUS ~ It never really works for long . . . it truly is not my nature to be rigid. ~ ahahah!
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:47pm EDT
Rene, mostly I walk. Try to see things in a different way. Listen. I've actually gotten a few ideas for scenes that way.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:53pm EDT
Pat I do that also...

Now Listening is easier for me to do in silence. With other people around I "attempt" to listen, but my mind is continually working on another thought.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:48pm EDT
Yes, Rene, when I write poetry I see symbols or sybolism, here's a line from one of my poems about a road: It's paved with a laugh and next to a star and glowing in yellow moon beams. (Are those symbols? Not sure, LOL)
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 9:55pm EDT
Sure Nancy ~ The STAR, the YELLOW MOON BEAMS ~ and even LAUGHTER is a symbol if you can visualize it in your mind.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 9:49pm EDT
Silly and absurd sometimes turns to profound. Probably because when we're playful we tap most easily into our creative side. The opposite works, too -- when I try to be profound, it usually does become silly and aburd! So out it goes.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:00pm EDT
Oh that's deep Pat. I really like the movement of your mind . . . "Silly and absurd sometimes turns to PROFOUND." ~ Pat Bertram

I'm going to use that line in a poetic as a quote from you with your Release signed to give me permission.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 9:54pm EDT
That's exactly right, Pat. I thought I was the only one that happened to. I find when I'm stuck with dialogue if I let the characters get silly sooner or later as they talk they get some decent dialogue going.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:05pm EDT
Good point Nancy. I usually do the same, but I insert some sort of unexpected DRAMA, then the dialogue flows well! ~ As you can tell, I'm fairly comfortable with DRAMA. {smiles}.

I'm loving this reply to this comment option!
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 9:54pm EDT
Sometimes I see symbolism when I write. Unfortunately it's not always something others would understand and I find myself having to consciously make the effort to translate it. The symbolism comes, then I have to turn it into a picture the reader might understand. Not surprising, the first flash fiction story I wrote with the intent of submitting to an e-zine was so dripping in symbolism the editor automatically rejected it as being too out there. (He liked the rewrite though).
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:06pm EDT
L V. ~ I sure would love to hear a line from you as an example.
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 10:15pm EDT
Rene, feel free to read the whole thing if you want. Both versions are on my blog.

1st version
Snow

2nd version
Behind a White Curtain
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:25pm EDT
Oh Thanks L V ~ I will. This will be great weekend reading for me.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 10:28pm EDT
Lori, I want to read your stories, too. Thanks I'll go on over after the chat.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:28pm EDT
Ha! I like the beginning of "Snow" already . . . just clicked on the link. I'm all into this one!
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 10:01pm EDT
That's great, Lori. My main character in my PI novels does not get into symbolism much, but the supporting character does and she also likes verses and has her own little arsenal of sayings. She's kind of strange and I think the two together make for some fun dialogue.
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 10:03pm EDT
Even more fun if the main character makes light of her strangeness with a few soft jabs.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:07pm EDT
Nancy ~ I'm going to have to read some of your Novels.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 10:07pm EDT
Yes, and the supporting character begins to spook the main chjaracter. In fact, she spooks a really rude guy at a deli when he overhears her saying she is a High Priestess in Santoria and the guy says: "Isn't that the sweet wine they drink at Bar Mitvah's and it makes you gag?" She replies he's lucky she's not so fast to throw a curse anymore. Then the lights blink and she grins a bit Cheshire cat smile
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 10:19pm EDT
I love that, especially if it is the wine he mentions (I'm not wine saavy enough to know, and know very little about Bar Mitvah's).

And what some readers, but not all, might catch is that many wines (especially ones used for something as important as that) are often named for the region the grapes are grown in. If that is the case for that wine, then that opens more possibilities of what her comment can mean.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 10:07pm EDT
Lori, I like characters that don't take themselves too seriously. Especially when the story is serious. It makes the story more real.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 10:09pm EDT
Thanks Rene, will be searching for a publisher soon. Still working on a re write and then an edit. My goal is to have Vendetta ready by the end of August. We'll see...The Muse Willing
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:21pm EDT
Is "Vendetta" the name of your Novel? Isn't there a Novel already out named "Vendetta"?
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:22pm EDT
Nancy ~ I'm sure I have the Novel Vendetta ~ forget who it is by, but I've had it for years.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 10:24pm EDT
Yes, there are many novels named Vendetta, I changed mine to Vendetta: A Deadly Win. To separate it from the others.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:29pm EDT
Oh Great! Because I bought the Novel "Vendetta" originally because I was going to write a Novel called "Vendetta", and then tossed it out of my mind ~ but I do have the Outline.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 10:15pm EDT
Nancy, that sounds great! Then the fun begins -- querying.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 10:18pm EDT
Actually Pat, I think the hardest part has been writing a three page double spaced synopsis. I have a publisher in mind, will send to them first.
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 10:21pm EDT
Why does that make me think of that other dreaded word ... Resume? Another thing you spend hours agonizing over, perfecting, hoping some day someone will actually read it.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 10:28pm EDT
I don't like doing synopses or descriptions. A one or two sentence description of a book that took years to write? Talk about absurdity! I never have figured out good ones. I keep hoping that someone who writes a review will come up with a good one, and then I can use that!
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 10:37pm EDT
I think a good synopsis writer could make lot of money, all the writer's I've talked to would gladly hire that job out. Then they'd rewrite it because the guy left out "all the good stuff". LOL
James R. Jul 30, 2009, 10:41pm EDT
Pat, I'm with you on that. It is truly tortuous to attempt to turn 100,000 words into a catchphrase or two. We're writing about catchphrases here, but it truly is hard work to create a few words that both entice the potential reader and do justice to the actual longer work.
Deborah J Ledford Jul 30, 2009, 10:41pm EDT
Synopsis' are the most difficult to write. There are so many restrictions--and many agents/editors only want a one-page synopsis. Nearly impossible.
Deborah J Ledford Jul 30, 2009, 10:42pm EDT
Right, Nancy--sometimes having someone else provide a wrap up of your work is beneficial.
Deborah J Ledford Jul 30, 2009, 10:44pm EDT
Even more difficult is coming up with a tagline--a phrase suitable for a movie poster.
For Staccato, I came up with: Retribution played double-time.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 10:49pm EDT
I'd forgotten about the different lengths of synopses. Some agents wanted one page, some wanted three, some wanted five. And some wanted a one paragraph description.
Nancy N. Jul 30, 2009, 10:49pm EDT
That's cool, Deborah. I'm going to bug out now, I have a very early appointment in the morning. Thanks for coming and for all your input, keep the chat going I'll come back tomorrow and read the comments. See everyone later.
Angela A. Jul 30, 2009, 10:49pm EDT
Tonight, my mind went blank on what to say..
So, I've been reading what everyone wrote instead, to maybe get some ideas.

The synopsis is one of the most difficult things to write. But, if you get it down pat, it can be one of the best tools to sell your novel.

Most of the things I write are about friends who turn into so much more. That's my favorite subject.

But, each relationship is different in its own way. They have their own quirks and personalities.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:52pm EDT
Glad you are okay Angela ~ I thought you had been hi-jacked.

I'm signing out now too. I was reading all the comments.
René Allen Jul 30, 2009, 10:54pm EDT
This was a WONDERFUL CHAT, and I really enjoyed everyone.

SEE you next CHAT!
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 10:51pm EDT
I never did come up with any tag lines. I like yours, Deborah -- Retribution played double-time. I have a great one for Light Bringer, but it gives the story away, so I can't use it. I'll have to think of something.
Deborah J Ledford Jul 30, 2009, 10:55pm EDT
Thanks so much, Nancy. Great conversation!
James R. Jul 30, 2009, 10:55pm EDT
Deborah, I like your tagline. Having read the first two chapters -- at least of the version you posted here -- it seems to fit the novel well.
Deborah J Ledford Jul 30, 2009, 11:07pm EDT
Thanks, James. I'll be uploading the "final" version of the chapters soon.
Pat Bertram Jul 30, 2009, 11:00pm EDT
Thanks for the interesting discussion topic, Nancy, and thank you everyone for participating. I'm glad you came, Lori! It was great having you here.
Angela A. Jul 30, 2009, 11:01pm EDT
Aw, it's over already huh?
L V Gaudet Jul 30, 2009, 11:12pm EDT
Sorry to just vanish off into the deep dark recesses of the internet ... I think my internet provider, or my little internet box thing (whatever it is) put me for a timeout. Got kicked off and couldn't get back on. That's the wonders of having rural phone line (they claim its high speed, but I've seen snails move faster) internet service.

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