Sarah Palin's Moose heads

Many years ago when I lived in Alaska, I came to a startling conclusion about the people who thought they lived on another planet.

They had a strong sense of protecting women. They were also inundated with the curious notion that God was on their side, but not on the side of the Indian. That oil would make everyone rich. That large guns were better than small guns. That whiskey was far, far, far, far better than milk.

Of course, these were just surface impressions, but I think they point out a budding mindset that skews reason until it's twisted enough to squawk.

Then there's something else. Something arcane, and malevolent (as if the above notes weren't malevolent enough), and leaves us to pause in reflection. How can people like these congregate without destroying something?

The answer to that, I am glad to report, as I know the answer, is they can't. They think that Alaska is so vast, so populated by caribou, bears, fish and ice that they can get away with anything. This includes destroying a delicate ecological balance, because truths to tell, for the most part, Alaskans are a deadly stupid bunch of people. I can say this because of my background. Naturally, I would resent anyone else saying it.

Of course, this brings us to Alaskan politics. As you may have noted, the unmistakable impression offered, is that when you deal with Alaskans, for the most part (please note that there are some who are ecologically conscious, and a few who are downright brilliant), they feel that the political realm should reflect their righteous sense of greed. That's where Alaskan republicanism comes into effect.

It's also, why, in my opinion, Alaskan republicans are one of the most villainous bunch of corrupt scoundrels you are ever likely to meet, outside a closed, smoky room in a Washington, D.C. basement.

They can't help it. Their environment perpetuates the myth that they know-it-all, when the numerous disasters they have initiated prove all too often otherwise.

This brings us to Sarah Palin. Governor Palin. Governor of a state with the population of most towns in the lower forty-eight, and with the sort of responsibilities that prepare her to take on the world, because as a prior mayor of Wasilla, Alaska she has proven herself to be a nut.

I wish I could say otherwise, but what else can you call it when someone's ego peaks at the thought of sitting on a throne in Olympus, when one's true capabilities render him or her just able to squat on a freezing toilet in Alaska?

Yes, yes, I know. Harsh words. Nevertheless, they are justified, especially when you once lived there. Therefore, the ego-socked, religiously drenched, hockey mom, as she proudly brands herself, is ready to take on the world, because there's more than an even chance John McCain won't last another couple of years.

In that scenario, though, where would we be? Simple. A female Sarah McCain Bush,   with the same bunch of corporate robber barons they're all used to hearing tell them what to do, raising the Christian flag of dopistry, and vetoing a stupefied democratic Congress at every turn.

Sarah Palin is the sort of person you wouldn't want to be a nanny to your children, because the only thing she's prepared to do is be an Alaskan control freak, looking to mount more moose heads.