The dark stair had scared her.
Mother's bosom used to be sought.
Solace, oh, deep solace!
A space to bury head
Like an Ostrich.
She finds floating message of memory
On a bottle from ancient age.
Her cold fingers grabs
The railings of long and magnificent stair.
Fear, oh fear don't return here
For she has to climb
To nowhere.
A distant sound of ringing cell
Rising very near from her hand bag
Head sings.
A bird of perplexity sits on her shoulder.
She has to climb.
To?
The dark stair had scared her.
She remembers this clearly.
Now in a world without a mother
Her call has taken her
To a floor above.
She has been there.
Then why now?
The dark stair....
A stair to an old floor, mossy.
She knows the wild fingers of her old boss
Creeping on the floor above.
Mother, oh mother
Open your mouth and sallow her.
recommend this
email
print
link to this page
Comments: 10
hand bag is one word.
It's OK. Just me, I don't think this is your best work. I like some of the images; others, not so much.
Allow me to note, my opinion is subjective.
Poddar, this part of your poem took me to a distant place . . .
She finds floating message of memory
On a bottle from ancient age.
Her cold fingers grabs
The railings of long and magnificent stair.
Fear, oh fear don't return here
For she has to climb
To nowhere.
[I just absolutely loved this part!]
. . . "bottle of ancient age" -- what a line!
Right at the right spot! LOVE IT!
Her climb to "nowhere" struck me as a climb to somewhere higher yet unknown.
And then you have . . .
"A bird of perplexity sits on her shoulder."
(great visual)
Then I carry on with your poetic work up to this point . . .
"The dark stair had scared her.
She remembers this clearly."
and then I STOP. [The remainder of the poem cannot enter my mind]
I LOVE this poem right up to "She remembers this clearly."
It is perfect ending right there for me.
Maybe you can do a "REMIX" on this poem, Poddar. Take the part from "She remembers clearly" -- climbing down from there with a REMIX.
I would like to hear more thoughts on this one from others.
I thought this one was your best poem right up the line ~
"She remembers this clearly."
Blessings Poddar, Cheryl, karl, Lyla and Everyone else viewing this ~
Rene A.
(did you mean SWALLOW?)
Thanks for posting it