no means no

I think it's wise to be careful. I have posted shots of me and hubby but never of the kids' faces. Any shots of them are with their head turned away or in a Halloween mask or something. Even their younger shots are too close for comfort to me.

Golds, you are right. I never post face pictures of my husband, or my daughter. I have of me though.....bad me....

Hello Golds I feel the same way. I don't post my picture due to problems before. Thanks for posting this I'm glad someone feels the same way.

Good advice, especially for people who live in a city or close to one

glad to see you agree now I'm waiting for those who will not agree lol!

I have never and will never post these to your groups as I respect your opinion. But I completely disagree with you. My doors are never locked nor my car. If someone wants in that bad they will get in. But we choose well in were we live. I doubt if people could find me, and if they do they will ruin there car getting to my home. I will not change my behavior because of fear. I freely post all my friends and family with their knowledge and permission and have done this since computers were first out in the 80's.

good advice. always better to be safe than sorry.

April thank you but I'm not suggesting living in fear I'm saying take precautions soo that you don't end up being the mother on the news. Just becuase something can happen doesn't mean you should give it easy access

Not posting innocent photos of kids in clothing because of "bad" people is like staying indoors for the rest of your life because there was a murder up the street. I refuse to be limited by the fact that evil exists. I can't do anything about evil, or evil people's use of what is essentially good. I will do what's good, wholesome, fun, and creative, and not worry about the outcome. How very paranoid the media has made us!!!!

keeping all pictures of your children out of public realm would be the same as keeping your kids off the streets, or any public area, because one of the persons that see your kids might be a creep with bad thoughts.

I'm not saying be paranoid I'm saying the difference between having some nut see your kids photo get interested and try to fins said kid I leave my house I lock the door I don't leave it open thats an invitation to a robbery

no theres a difference the interest gives access to million and billions of people taking your kid to the park is not the same

I've heard stories of people seeing a photo of someone online and then stalking them in real life. I'm sure you've heard the same stories as me.

Why put yourself at risk its the same as saying I'll cross the street when the cars are driving after all they'll see me and they'll stop but theres always the one who doesn't pay attention or the one who just doesn't care theres always the one dangerous creep

It saddens me that so many people have been duped by the media into thinking our world is saturated with people wanting to hurt our children, as if evil lurked around every corner.

I've worked with children all my life and have three boys and a girl of my own, and 5 lovely grandchildren. Few people ever want to bring harm to children. The mass media sensationalises, it creates paranoia and hysteria. Everyone has become a victim to that in the modern age. It hasn't gotten any worse, the media is simply more prevalent in its reporting.

Less than 5 children in our country were killed by a stranger last year, well over 100 were killed by parents or a relation. Most abuse happens in the home - fact. Perhaps this fear is also a comfort zone - that all the hurt & evil can only ever happen out *there* ... or because of the internet.

I might suggest that you look at those people through media-tinted glasses. Perhaps they are just appreciating your children? I'm sorry, but it's really getting paranoid when every stranger who you catch looking at your children is labelled a paedophile.

But back to the point of this article, I see no problem with posting pictures of my children, or others for that matter. It's not that I refuse to succomb to living in a prison, it's just that I think that prison is more imaginary than people think. Just apply common sense, that's all!

Just my two cents.

I understand completely Golds...I am sorry if I have accidentally posted a picture to your group. I see where you are coming from and I have even had a stalker (when I was much younger.) BUT I feel fine about posting my pictures....I live in a really rural area and yes I do still lock all my doors and windows. If you notice I avoid using names for the most part if they have the same last name as mine. Thank you and I still love ya~

you aren't defenseless. Here are some general safety guidelines that I use when posting photos of me and mine.



Don't give your userID(s) or password(s) to anyone. System administrators that need to access your account for maintenance, or to correct problems, will likely have your account information.


Be careful about who you give out personal information to - especially your social security number. Remember: Think before you post, and read the site's privacy statement.


Avoid opening email attachments from people you don't know.


Use good judgment about paying with credit cards on-line; if you aren't certain if the company is reputable, don't do it!


Never assume an email message is private, nor that they can be read by only yourself or the recipient - and never send something that you would not want to see on the evening news.


Always get written permission from a child's parent(s) before posting the child's name or photo on-line.


When posting a child's photo on-line, don't post the child's address, telephone number, school name, or last name.


When posting photos of kids on-line, be certain that the image is of small enough dimensions and low enough resolution/quality that it can't be used for anything else.


Get and use a free web-based email account to shunt unwanted or "iffy" email to.

I'm tired of mass media perpetuating a culture of fear under the scapegoat of informing the public. Nowhere is this more apparent than how they discuss youth culture and use scare tactics to warn parents of the safety risks about the Internet. The choice to perpetually report on the possibility or rare occurrence of kidnapping / stalking / violence because of Internet sociability is not a neutral position - it is a position of power that the media chooses to take because it's a story that sells. There's something innately human about rubbernecking, about looking for fears, about reveling in the possibilities of demise. Mainstream media capitalizes on this, manipulating the public and magnifying the culture of fear. It sells horror films and it sells newspapers.
Let's step back a few years. Remember Columbine? I was living in Amsterdam at the time and the coverage was brilliant - the Dutch press talked about how there was a school shooting by kids who felt alienated from their community. And then the US coverage started pouring in. Goths (or anyone wearing black, especially black trench coats) were marked as the devil incarnate. Video games were evil and were promoting killing. Everything was blamed except the root cause: alienation. There were exceptions though. I remember crying the first time i read Jon Katz's Voices from the Hellmouth where numerous youth poured out their souls about how they were treated in American education systems. Through his articles, he was able to capture the devastation of the culture of fear. My professor Henry Jenkins testified in Washington about how dangerous our culture has become, not because there are tools of rage, but an unchecked systematic creation of youth alienation. He pleaded with Congress: "Listen to our children. Don't fear them." And yet, we haven't. In response, youth went underground. Following one of his talks, a woman came up to him dressed in an array of chaotic pink. She explained to Henry that she was a goth, but had to go underground. What kind of world do we live in where a color symbolizes a violent act?

We fear our children. We fear what they might do in collectives. We ban them from public spaces (see "Mall won't allow teens without parents"). We think that we are protecting them, but we're really feeding the media industry and guaranteeing the need for uncountable psychiatrists. Imagine the weight that this places on youth culture. Imagine what it's like to grow up under media scrutiny, parental protectionism and formalist educational systems.
Protectionist actions tends to create hatred, resentment. It destroys families by failing to value trust and responsibility. Ageist rhetoric alienates the younger generation. And for what purpose?

The effects are devastating. Ever wonder why young people don't vote? Why should they? They've been told for so damn long that their voices don't matter, have been the victims of an oppressive regime. What is motivating about that? How do you learn to use your voice to change power when you've been surveilled and controlled for so long, when you've made an art out of subversive engagement with peers? When you've been put on drugs like Strattera that control your behavior to the point of utter obedience?
We need to break this culture of fear in order to have a healthy society. Please, please... whenever you interact with youth culture (whether you're a parent, a schoolteacher or a cafe owner), learn from them. Hear them from their perspectives and stop trying to project your own fears onto them. Allow them to flourish by giving them the freedom to make sense of their identity and culture. It doesn't mean that there aren't risks - there are. But they are not as grandiose as the press makes them out to be. And besides, youth need to do stupid things in order to learn from their own mistakes. Never get caught up in the "i told you so" commentary that comes after that "when i was your age" bullshit. People don't learn this way - they learn by putting their hand in the fire and realizing it really is hot and then stepping back.

When changes happen in society leading to unexpected results, culture fires up an immune system in the form of urban legends and cautionary tales. I'm sitting on my hands waiting for the first real "MySpace murder" urban legend to spread like wildfire as a way of teaching the dangers of public social networks.Somewhere out there an urban legend is slowly swirling and gaining momentum about the unexpected dangers around sharing yourself on MySpace or Facebook. My guess is that the story will be inspired by some real life "psychotic" individual or rebuffed lover who will use publicly-available information to track, stalk and ultimately kill an innocent young woman. This will mutate and be retold by email forwards until it is a well known story to every internet user and is told at slumber parties, around campfires, and over games on Xbox Live. Whether the recipients believe it or take it to be true, they will slightly alter the way they think about the world and begin exploring their privacy settings de rigueur.
The main point here is that society is self-regulating and has means to deal with new threats. Initially, many chicken-littles will cry the sky is falling and demonize each change in our world but eventually the public will normalize around a "best set" of privacy options and those will become the default. Each generation will internalize the story of the poor stalked girl and users will come to expect that any network they join will be built by those who also know the story and fear the same things. As the "default" becomes assumed, the story will fade from relevance and eventually be forgotten as what it is transmitting is no longer useful. Also, companies which violate the default will now be demonized themselves as it will be "well known" about what happens when you deviate from what people expect.

This fear of a pedophile finding your child?s picture online, and then stalking your child for evil purposes, is nothing more than an urban legend

I have to agree with Golds further. I met my ex-husband online at 19, when the internet was first becoming a household thing. It was new and exciting and I was vulnerable. Turned out he was a sexual offender who later abused me and the kids that kept on coming due to rape. I could not get away -- my parents were angry with me, all the "friends" we had told me I was the crazy one, that I should submit to my husband, etc. If I post pics of my kids' faces, how can I tell them not to share personal info online? It would be a double standard. We monitor our kids closely online. They have to ask before logging on, and we always peek in and see what sites they are using. It's an open conversation sort of thing and the kids ask about ads they see or if it's ok to try something like a poll or game. Anyone who needs to see a facial shot of my kids is family or friends, and I can email them privately with the photos rather than share them with the wide world. No I'm not paranoid, just careful, and with good reason from past experience. I wish the media had been more vocal when the internet was relatively new in the American home! So I guess that addresses April's advice to learn by putting your hand in the fire and realizing it is really hot . . . . I didn't get to step back -- I had to run for my life and for those of my children.

WOW...great discussion here! I agree with both of you. Golds, I can see your point but I also agree with April. I am careful what pictures I post . I don't know if I am a member of any of your groups, but I don't do videos...and I am careful as to what groups I post my material to.

Even this from a site that works with Pedophiles to keep children safe has this to say


It seems more and more parents are becoming concerned about the dangerous unknown we call the World Wide Web. There has been recent concern about posting normal, family related pictures. Is posting a family picture online for others to see really putting your child at danger?

Our organization works online with pedophiles every day. Real ones. Our abuse prevention programs are based on the information we gathered by infiltrating internet circles of them to learn how they act. Such first hand research gives us a unique perspective to answer this question that nobody else can.

First you must ask yourself:..how likely is this? In reality, the fear that a pedophile is somehow going to see your child's picture, then become obsessed, go through the nearly impossible feat to identify your child in the first place, then develop an elaborate plan to somehow abduct your child, is about as likely as your child being hit with a small asteroid, twice in the same day.

Pedophiles are opportunists. While they may have preferences as to the way a child looks, the children they molest are based on the ones they have an opportunity to be around. And yes, nearly every pedophile is around children every day. We catch less than one percent of them, and they exist in a population well into the millions, likely into the tens of millions in the United States alone. Our organization has recently come up with mathematical equations based on the most widely accepted numbers, indicating that around one in every 20-30 adults has active pedophile tendencies.

This fear of a pedophile finding your child's picture online, and then stalking your child for evil purposes, is nothing more than an urban legend. It has never happened, nor is it likely to in the future. It is simply not how they work. They do not need to go through elaborate heists to get children. Most are around kids every day. Even the ones who aren't and might consider an abduction, are going to search for the easiest victim. They will pick one out based on their geographic location, not go through great lengths to try and find and stalk a child's picture they saw on the internet.

While the fear parents have about this may be real, it is unfounded. A thief is not going to spend days fumbling on a solid steel lock with a thousand tumblers, when the door 3 feet away is already open and swinging in the wind. Likewise, a pedophile will not take the most difficult, complex route to a victim.

The only real justification to such a claim, is that pedophiles are picture collectors. Sometimes they do peruse through photo sites for pictures of children. However, the reality is this: The most common internet pictures of random kids used by pedophiles are taken with a telescopic lens, and without you even knowing about it. Beach pictures, in the mall, walking down the street. The family pictures you take and distribute to relatives without the help of the internet are much more likely to end up in the hands of a pedophile, and still may end up online anyway. While it is a discomforting thought for parents to think that pictures of their child may ever be viewed by a pedophile,short of locking your child in the basement, it is a reality of the age. Picture sharing over the web is a convenience. It is something loved by family and friends. When we breed a society where innocent pictures are too dangerous to be shared, then all we've done is added another atrocity.

Society would be much better off, if we could stop wasting time on these misguided fears, and instead apply the same effort to abuse prevention. Lost in all this is the fact that nearly every incident of sexual abuse is preventable, with simple steps that parents can take. The media has done a great disservice to the public, by focusing on the problem of sexual abuse from the extreme fraction of a percent, and reinforcing traditional views of pedophiles which are far from accurate. If parents don't understand the way they work and act, you can't protect your children. The ploys pedophiles use can be stopped, if parents simply take the time to address the things that make their children vulnerable to begin with. With simple steps that nearly every parent can take, just about every molester can be kept at bay.

We understand that it can be hard to find ways to address this topic with your kids, which is why we offer safety programs that teach kids how to defeat abuse simply by reading them a children's book. Each book addresses a different concept in abuse prevention, and over the series your children will learn the skills they need to stop just about any attack. Instead of creating new things to fear as parents, let's go on the attack to ensure that our kids are protected.

Mary, unfortunately your contacting your ex online was the problem not not posting family photos. MY above statment is taken from a site to keep kids safe and even they say it is a myth perpuated by the media

I can understand where you're coming from here golds, but I'm going to agree with April on this one. I am not going to let fear dictate how I live my life.

I regularly put up photos of my family. However, I do use common sense as I do not have our full names here, nor our addresses. I can't even find MYSELF on the internet, so I'm not really worried about someone finding me.

Okay, I somewhat agreed with April, but then the comments just got a bit long winded. But I did read the first few.

If I have photos of my kids online, how is that really any different than taking them to the store? Or the park? To be honest, too many times it is those that we should trust that are the most harmful... doctors, police officers, bus drivers and teachers. At least that has been the case in our neck of the woods more often than not in the last 10 years.

Just my opinion.

This fear of a pedophile finding your child's picture online, and then stalking your child for evil purposes, is nothing more than an urban legend. It has never happened, nor is it likely to in the future. It is simply not how they work. They do not need to go through elaborate heists to get children. Most are around kids every day. Even the ones who aren't and might consider an abduction, are going to search for the easiest victim. They will pick one out based on their geographic location, not go through great lengths to try and find and stalk a child's picture they saw on the internet.

I totally agree with April H.'s intelligent and well-written ,both in form and content, comment. I think that fear is ignorance and sometimes the dog doing the loudest barking is the same one digging the holes. Salud.

I would say it's more important that your personal info. isn't given out. I dont ever put my last name out on here or birth-date for that matter. I dont see a problem with kids pics. as long as they are kept anonymous as much as possible.

It saddens me that so many people have been duped by the media into thinking our world is saturated with people wanting to hurt our children, as if evil lurked around every corner.
I agree, April H. I think you state succinctly how many folks feel. Good job. Salud.

When it comes to kids, parents need to be careful up to what their discretion is. But mostly I lean towards April H. here. Gaedith posted her picture, I posted mine. I went to meet her and her daughter over the holidays and now we are in love and looking to marry. We've both been looking a long time, we're both Christians and we believe ours is a success story. Where would we be without sharing our photos. I appreciate the concerns you speak of and obviously, I will re-check my groups and if you're the owner to any I sent an image to (I don't do videos) I apologize and will only send articles. But right now I do not know of any of your groups I belong to.

April honey, you voiced your opinion, some, like me, will agree some won't. Respect is a mutual two-way road.

God Bless

you can not live in fear - you have to face it and beat it

I can understand the concern on both sides. I'm glad we can agree to disagree on this topic. It's good to practice common sense caution, and it's also good that we aren't to live in fear. Golds has had a bad experience and is understandably cautious. She is passing on the wisdom learned from her experience on to us and her loved ones. I appreciate that very much.


Book Review: The Morcai Battalion
Slow Cooker Mexican Beef Stew

I have to say I am also with April on this.. I dont feel posting pictures is going to cause me and my family to get hit by something.. I think the "nuts" on the computer have it a bit easy with all the lil dingy bat girls flaunting themselves everywhere.. I really think a "bad person" will try to get something thats easy like all the girls showing themselves all over the interent..

And I also think it would be much easier for a person to see me out in public and try something rather then on here and try to search me down.. I have faith in God that he will protect my family from evil and watch over us as we sleep and I honestly pray this all the time and I feel God is with me and watching over my family at all times so I try not to worry to much!

I have always lived in the public eye with actor parents and friends and spouse of International fame, and yes, you do get the nut jobs sometimes, but it is hard to really find someone and most people that stalk really never leave thier computers! Just be careful of everyone! I use my P.o. Box address when communicating with strangers.

Robert that sounds like a great story! Congrats!

That's why I post so m any nature shots. I have tons of beautiful family shots, but that's just it they are for FAMILY.

If I post a photo of my son it's because his face is covered or it is shot from behind. Nothing that can ID us has or will be posted. (There were a few photos up for a contest and they've long ago been removed.)

I commend everyone on how respectful we all have been; even though we disagree with each others opinions on a very relavant topic.
But I would not knowingly publish an image or video to your groups knowing how you feel on this matter.

Gold I do have to ask.. on your main page there is pics of a baby.. im guessing this must be a fake baby since your totally against putting pics of people and babies on the ent.. and a few even has the baby half naked.. couldnt that attract a predator.. I hope this comment dont make ya mad but IM trying to understand exactly how your feeling..

"And if its not a baby of your or something shouldnt it have copy right thing saying whos pictures it really is so they are credited with their work"

I would love to hear from you Golds

did you see the pictures im talking about Jerri..

Sure, I'm mindful of what I post here on Gather. But, I figure that I have just as much risk of someone casing out my housing by driving down the block.

For me it boils down to have the in-home protections that make theft difficult. Protections include 1) secure home Internet access, 2) security systems on the car and home, 3) special storage for my identification documents, and 4) omission of my real birthdate from any online viewable personal information.

Hope this helps you right now golds, as you're working through your fear.

OMG I just realized that most your images are not yours. And you never even said when we commented that your baby was adorable as you never said that they were not your photos. This is one of your posted images taken from photobucket that you did not give credit too.

I refuse to live my life in fear.

April Much of that was cut off!! BUT I GET THE POINT AND I THINK ITS A BUNCH OF BS

And look at all the LOVELY comment that was given to some work thats not hers!!!

uhh you're one to talk sending random articles to my groups Aiden's Catnip Cafe, Take a Walk with Me and Urban Exploration, even though I've sent out content specific notices several times.
I suggest you pay attention to what YOU send to groups before you throw stones. .
just a thought

Sad soooo sad

Heather I hope you have read the last few comments.. the work she has posted "picture wise" is not hers anyways!! But she took the comments very well!!!

and as april pointed out I just noticed you have no problem with posting images that are not your own. . .

first off, as a group owner myself i fully understand how aggravating it is to have to delete content from group membs who will not take the time,as i do when publish,to select the appropriate groups....i even read a comment which said member just selects all groups leaving it up to group owners to accept/decline since that is their job!...LOL...some people don't have a clue about being considerate and others are just lazy...

regarding the privacy issue of posting people pics,etc., i agree with most of what April writes....i live in a semi-rural area near a busy road at the back side of property,so i do lock my home doors,but usually not my car doors.....having an amazing hearing pitbully who is my alarm alerts me to even wild animals on the property...i know she is a toddler acting pup with a fierce bark,but strangers see her as a threat due to her dark,firm muscular body and mighty jaws n' teeth....

as far as the internet goes, you are seen by strangers anywhere you go and not sure what makes you think there are more harmful people online than around your town,or even your neighborhood....common sense and being aware of your surroundings when out n' about is key to safety to at least some degree....

also, i want to mention a tip that many may not think about > if you are driving alone,especially at night,and suddenly a cop signals you over, drive to nearest police precinct,or some other highly visible public place before stopping your vehicle....there are many reports of not only those posing as cops,but actual officers pulling over women,raping them and then dumping their bodies .....you will not get an extra ticket for not pulling over asap once you explain why you didn't....

cheers,gayle

Yeah Tiffany I just saw that! Just another person to add to my list of uncredited work posters *Sigh*
I've removed myself from all your groups by the way Golds since you have a thing against original work but work that isnt yours is fine to post?

This is almost funny to read. I moderate a group that's on a particular subject and most of the group content I have to decline is YOURS. You post every single thing you put on gather to ALL the groups you belong to whether the content is appropriate or not. And then have the nerve to ask others to only post certain content to the groups you own. What gives?

lol Oh what a great article NO MEANS NO!!!

just read some new coms after i posted mine....golds G > copyright violation is a Federal offense in the USA....if the original owners find out that you are posting their work without paying fees,or having their permission,you can be sued at great cost to you including court costs.....it is also against Gather TOS to post work not CR to you without proof of permission.....if the photos in question are not PUBLIC DOMAIN, which you still include owner's name and CR info if available, then you need to remove them to avoid any possible legal actions from the original owners....

i hope you posted these photos out of ignorance of the laws/site policy and not just thinking it was an easy way to points....stealing is stealing no matter what it is...

~gayle a working photog with integrity

we are grown adults here, and i for one want to post thing to make people happy and smile,,,,I dont mention names, or anything such as address, so come ranchat the house of thousand who got married.. On Gather there is on very few who know where I live, and I know onely one exactly who has my address, which I trust him with my heart.. so dont tell em what to post or where to post it,, You are not the big brother, let us decide to be carefull and how to do what we want...

sorry for my rant...

I've never posted a video on gather. takes too damn much time. I am impatient in that way you see.

As to pics, I won't be intimidated. At the moment, I do have a moritorium on posting any pics on gather and the only pic I have on facebook is of me but no one but friends can see it.

Better safe than sorry, no matter who's article it is.

golds, you are more than just bad about sending stuff to the wrong groups, when you were in some of my moderated groups all I did was delete stuff you sent. Id send you and email you would not reply and so i removed you from the group. you really should practice what you preach when it comes to posting to groups properly.


my groups also have a no net photo policy and you posted net photos to them constantly. If anyone joins a group they should know what is and isn't allowed. If you have a problem then send a group email reminder. If that does not work remove the member.


And please go back and edit this article you have so many words ran together its hard to read

Gayle IM glad you noticed that! IM here to make sure everyone does!

Tiffany my "wall of shame" list keeps getting bigger this week. I just can't believe it. I even removed her from one of my groups, she rejoined and started sending everything.
can some one tell me what the heck a article on selling books has to do with CATS?

From others comments I decided to look at your images. Most are copyrighted and don't belong to you. Further, you don't give credit or have permission to post them.

Garfield is copyrighted by a big time syndicate. They can sue your butt off. You should get busy and take all those images that you didn't personally take, off.

Of course, Gather doesn't care so leave them up until told otherwise. :-(

lol I know!!! Its crazy! I am glad you found this I seen your article the other day about people posting work that is not theirs and when I seen this I tried so hard to remember who it was that had that article!! Glad you found this!

I guess I can agree with April's comments.
My concerns are more inline with teens and the info that they willingly give out, or are tricked into giving out. That is were some true danger comes into play~!

Oh yeah definitly and them guys know how to lye to a teen girl!

I would not want others to use my photos as you have done, I have contacted the owners of the photos you posted. Hopefully they will contact gather and then the gather staff will ask you to remove them. Sorry, Golds but most all connections that I know do not approve of anyone taking credit for photos that are not yours. And every photo of yours except maybe the cake appear to be long to someone else. And sadly many of those who helped you get points for posting them believed errounously that they were of you & yours.

the cake isn't hers either April, I saw someone's comment about seeing it before in an email.

Thats ridiculous.. I wonder where golds is now.. probably spending the money she made from everyone elses work!

" Someone else posted this too--LOL!
Bundy (Colbert '08) P, Nov 13, 2007, 6:28pm EST "

Someone else apparently posted the cake picture too. . . Tiffany like most people, when caught with egg on their face, probably off to sulk.

Yeah probably! Well I guess IM off I bet tomorrow this is probably all going to be deleted ;)

Okay I dont knwo what has been said.. but if you have issuses with people posting pictures of themselves and want to be the martar to save them.. whatever deal with it...

But gather is a place to flaunt your familues and loved ones.. simple as that... so BLAH...

If you really have an issue stop owning your groups and get off gather...

I guess so.. sounds like it... I tried to read all the comments and I was awww too manty...

yeh there is alot!

Golds, I'd have to say that you are right in forewarning people of possible dangers out there but will have to say that I would have to go with April on this one as I refuse to live my life in fear. I live in a large city and feel like more than likely, if someone wants to find me they will as I am out there and recognizeable. I don't hide from the public but use my discretion when giving out my address to anyone which when you are in business for yourself as I am and the head of a corporation, your life is practically public domain and you can and will be found if wanted. So, I thank you for the premise of your editorial but must beg to differ with you and go with what April has stated in all of her comments.

wow, this is uh interesting...??? i'm lost... good nite...

I have to agree with April on this one. With the foundation James is in media just as any other child of abuse. That includes the internet. He is more in dangerous by his egg donor then he some person off the internet.

I'm sorry I did not read your article so I cannot comment on its content. The font was too small and the punctuation made it very hard to read.

I assume you're ranting about something being posted in your groups that you don't like.

I don't like spam mail in my mail room that appears to be trying to draw me into some argument or another.

Good night.

BTW, it wasn't you who place the spam mail in my mail room, but that will be remedied soon, too.

April H - I just wanted to let you know that somehow, someway, something lead me to this article. I think it may be to let you know that you are as wrong as one can be. Live the life of a cop or even a cops wife and you will know that you are wrong. How about living the life as a cops child.
They are out there and they are looking!

Thank you April ;o) I was a bit worried when I posted the video of my son tooting his arm after bath (with just a diaper on), but yet it is so stinkin' cute that I had to post it. I have found Gather to be a great place to be social & I always say, "I will continue to post until I have a stalker." So I don't worry too much. I am pretty careful to to give out my location & also share my birth year. I don't give out my last name etc. I did have a friend recently tell me that he had the hardest time looking up my phone # on the net & he even tried my family & still didn't get my phone # LOL! I credit that to moving every year & having to change our # each time LOL! So he had to email me ;o).
From what April was saying about how the media has made it all a HUGE hype about how stalkers can get you from the internet is the reason I don't watch the news or read the paper anymore. It all seems so dooms day & I just couldn't take it. I can't even watch some shows (like ER) because they show how kids get hurt all the time & after I had my kids I couldn't take it LOL. So I live a ignorant life & I love it ;o) The internet at time does sometimes scare the crap out of me, but for the most part it doesn't.
On the copyright thing I had to delete a video I made for the troops because I had a Green Day song on it & it was a copyright violation...I was so MAD, but in the long run could see how that is a violation ;o). I just didn't think about it. I am not one to really go around searching for who isn't doing their own stuff...I find Gather to be a place to share what things make us happy & if it's cute stuff we find on the net then whatever ;o). I think if it's on the net without the word copyright stamped to it then well it's free game. Is that wrong? I try to be careful, but I am sure that I have used a few photos for articles (Domino's Logo, etc) that could possibly be copyright? I think it is more advertisement for that person. Just a thought.
And Gold's I try to be careful when I post my stuff, and if I notice that the owner of the group has a cow with what I post I delete myself from that group. Hope everyone is having a good night ;o) I have been on this thread TOO long & I need to hang some curtains LOL!
Oh & also haha (I guess I am not done LOL) I have noticed through my studies of Gather is that people will generally post to negative threads than to positive ones...just a thought ;o)) NIGHT!

Oh & someone on Gather did tell me that someone else on Gather called them & it scared the crap out of them! So people don't give out your last name or even your significant other's last name ;o)

Birdee
I know there is alot to read here but I did give these guidlines in an comment here.
"you aren't defenseless. Here are some general safety guidelines that I use when posting photos of me and mine.



Don't give your userID(s) or password(s) to anyone. System administrators that need to access your account for maintenance, or to correct problems, will likely have your account information.


Be careful about who you give out personal information to - especially your social security number. Remember: Think before you post, and read the site's privacy statement.


Avoid opening email attachments from people you don't know.


Use good judgment about paying with credit cards on-line; if you aren't certain if the company is reputable, don't do it!


Never assume an email message is private, nor that they can be read by only yourself or the recipient - and never send something that you would not want to see on the evening news.


Always get written permission from a child's parent(s) before posting the child's name or photo on-line.


When posting a child's photo on-line, don't post the child's address, telephone number, school name, or last name.


When posting photos of kids on-line, be certain that the image is of small enough dimensions and low enough resolution/quality that it can't be used for anything else.


Get and use a free web-based email account to shunt unwanted or "iffy" email to.

I agree with you April. And I'm glad Tiffany gave a heads up about this one.

I see both points of view, but I personally don't worry...I make sure there isn't any personal info about me out there!

I don't know what you do now, Golds, but you used to send everything you posted to every group you belonged to. Yes, it was annoying, and why I stopped inviting you to groups. It IS annoying, isn't it?

So all you are saying, is give fear a chance? No thanks.

I understand caution, but I also understand that you and kids are more at risk at daycare, and the store, which is where these happen. The internet is a bigger risk to teenagers than anyone, because they are too willing to believe that somebody is who they say they are. That is why we teach our children caution, in person and online! We have to take steps to protect our families, but I refuse to live in fear. I live in faith.

I have to agree with April H. that we can be too concerned about the effects of crime. I know far more people whose lives are frozen by fear of crime than I know actual victims of it.

Bad things happen, but one cannot prevent them and cannot refrain from living in order to try and minimize the possibility of them. Be safe, be prudent, be careful but don't be paranoid.

why has this article been flagged?

all the photos I published were e-mail fwds and I believe I mentioned that when people asked me

the reason I wasn't here last night was I had things to do so why am I being attacked?

I never said anyone has to agree with me I'm just stating my own opinion you don't have to agree

April you are wrong in that saying we shouldn't scare our children about seeing certain colors have you forgotten about gangs and thier rivalry colors? Just recently there was a shooting in NJ becuase of a mistaken identity some kid was wearing the other gangs colors and was shot for it