Parents and Online Dating

Hi guys, this article is really just me seeking some help/opinions/suggestions! I really appreciate any words from you guys!

Okay...so I've been talking to this guy online for a few months now. I didn't meet him over the internet, I wasn't searching dating sites or anything. He actually plays the same game I do. And we just started talking...

He's 24, i'm 19. Not a bad age difference right? And we've talked a lot too, over 300 messages! lol. But we have a lot of common interests, the biggest one being our love for animals, especially dogs. He has a little yorky(who I can tell he really cares about), and my family has a golden retriever and pitbull mix. This month he is going to be taking a test to become a border control agent, if he passes it he'll be going to training in Mexico for 15 months!

Anyways, here's the problem....

He lives in New York, and he wants to meet. I want to take it just one step at a time though. I want to start sending eachother stuff in the mail first, just one step above the internet. But I am sooooo worried about telling my parents about him. I don't know how happy they would be with me talking with a guy on the computer.

I made the mistake of trying to talk to my older sister about him, I thought she would be the person I could go to. She was less than happy that I was talking to someone over the internet. And now I'm even more worried that my parents will be just as upset.

But I really do like him, and if he's even half as good as he seems right now I'd be lucky.

Comments: 11

j - Frugal Mom - r. Jun 10, 2008, 9:18am EDT

Uhh this is a tough one. If you were my child I too would be worried, and if you were my sister I probably would too. Needless to say you are an adult, and although there are so many horror stories out there there are also so many stories about people, who did find their love online. If it was me, I would continue online, and then as you suggest start mailing....this way it is more of a pen pal relationship, which your parents might be more relaxed about.

I'm actually in a different situation, as my dad is the one dating online:)

reply to this comment

Breanna E. Jun 10, 2008, 9:33am EDT

I'd love to move it to more of a pen pal thing first too. Of course we would probably still message eachother because we wouldn't want to have to keep waiting 3 days to get the letters! lol. But in order to go up to that step, I'd have to let my parents know about him-otherwise they'll ask why I'm getting letters from a guy in New York lol. Uh oh! How's the online thing going for your dad!? hehe

reply to this comment

Larry H. Jun 10, 2008, 11:17am EDT

thanks for sharing..

reply to this comment

Marty S. Jun 10, 2008, 6:25pm EDT

try sending him e-mail composing your thoughts, and saying how you want to take it slow and whatnot. If he can take some time to express his thoughts in an email letter, maybe this would be a good step.

reply to this comment

Breanna E. Jun 10, 2008, 6:57pm EDT

That's what we've beeen doing for a few months now, email. He knows that I want to take it slow, he's okay with it. But he also lets me know that he'd like to meet, but he doesn't get pushy about it.

reply to this comment

Marty S. Jun 11, 2008, 7:56pm EDT

OK, he is in New York, where are you?

I'd say you probably should not put your life on hold for 15 months, if he wants to meet you after he's finished his training for Immigration and Customs Enforcement, then you might be okay with that, but for now, maybe it's best that you two have your separate lives.

reply to this comment

Marty S. Jun 11, 2008, 7:58pm EDT

Duh, Arizona! Definately, New York is too far for a 19 y/o to travel to. Maybe at the end of his training, he can try getting ahold of you.

reply to this comment

Breanna E. Jun 12, 2008, 6:50pm EDT

Yeah that's what I was thinking...to wait until after the training, if he goes. But he bought a laptop and we are going to keep emailing eachother, so it'll be good to keep in touch :D

reply to this comment