Stupid $&()@#%*! Aggravating Cat!!!

Absurd little teacup poodle woke me this morning, yammering at the end of the bed, fairly bouncing with the need to attack whatever went “THUD, BAM, BANG!” I didn’t really HEAR “THUD, BAM, BANG!” I mostly remembered it once Ridiculous Dog woke me up.

Arianna, AKA Ridiculous Dog

“THUD, BAM,BANG!” Memory of the sound, plus the yapping of the dog, bailed me out of bed on the run. Whutinell could that have BEEN? Memory said it sounded like someone pounding on the door… or maybe someone in the house? In the house? Pounding on WHAT? I headed down the stairs, heart hammering, breath ragged. All was dark, and there was no sound.

I threw on the porch light as I opened the door. No one was there. I closed the door, turned and headed for the kitchen and turned on the lights, just as the coffeemaker fired up. I about jumped through the ceiling.

Swearing under my breath, I headed back upstairs. As I hit the upper hallway and turned toward the bedroom… “THUD, BAM, BANG!” The same three sounds in rapid order I’d not quite heard before. The yapping on the other side of the door stopped the noise as it had before… by scaring Aggravating Cat back under the hallway table, her attempt to scratch her ear with her clawless rear foot, heel banging on the bare hardwood floor, forgotten.

Brianna, AKA Aggravating Cat

Although three times larger than Arianna (aka Ridiculous Dog), Brianna (aka Aggravating Cat) is terrified of her, and Arianna knows it. So every time Brianna does ANYthing that irritates her, yappy little Arianna begins yapping at the top of her lungs, sending Brianna scurrying.

As I entered the bedroom and began disrobing for my shower, Arianna gave one last yap, turned around several times, and lay back down with a satisfied snort. I, heart rate calming and breathing returning to normal, headed for the bathroom. It was 4:35, and I was ten minutes late already.  TERRIBLE way to start a Monday.