So Long Again

In October of 2008 I wrote an account of the difficulty in saying so long in a post called It’s Not Goodbye It’s So Long. I ended my account with "So Long...until we meet again my little girl so grown up. "It's not goodbye, it's till we meet again."

My little girl so grown up came back home in June for nine days.

At the start of her first day home, when the excitement of welcoming her home had subsided, the echoes of laughter reverberated and the crescendo of sibling rivalry had begun to increase. My daughter made the following proclamation “Nothing has changed. I left home for eight months and nothing has changed. It’s as if I had never left.”

I looked at her and thought she’s wrong. So much has changed. Even the car that picked her up in June was different than the one that she rode in to airport in October. Though her family missed her terribly when she left, they had gone on with their lives independently of her having different memories than she did. Her bedroom that she shared with her sister before she left had become her sister’s room exclusively . At the same time she had created exciting memories of her own in Washington State. She was wrong everything had changed.

When she left home she left a town in Georgia that time had forgotten, where change comes slowly. Even this town had changed because of her new memories and experiences changed the way she looked at the town. In turn her observations on the town changed the way her family looked at the town. When she left she did not have a drivers license. When she came back she drove like a big city driver in a small town. Her driving even changed the usual calm expressions on the southern faces of any who came near to the car she was driving.

My daughter had a big project to do in the few days that she was home. She had to go through clothes, photos, collectables and memorabilia that she had left behind. She had to determine what was important enough to keep and what was good enough to be just memories.

As she sorted through keep and throw away she came face to face with someone she was familiar with, the little girl all grown up. She got a chance to review her life and was not unhappy with what she saw. She finished her project just before we all climbed in to the car to take her to the airport. She didn’t say goodbye to herself and her memories. She said “so long until we meet again.” I could tell by her eyes that she looked forward to the future that looked to be so sparkling. I knew that she looked forward to the time when she would be seeing herself again sometime down the road. She would be saying so long until we meet again.

I began this account to share my joy of spending time with my daughter and my sadness in knowing that I would be saying so long until we meet again but this was not my story to tell this time.

The story that needed to be told this time is a story about making choices so that when we review our lives we are not unhappy with what we see, but know the best is yet ahead. It’s about looking forward to reviewing our lives again and proudly saying, “I’m good now but I am getting better.” It’s about review and release. It’s about happily saying “So long until we meet again.”