by kendra s.
Member since:
July 31, 2008

Old Poem I wrote

August 01, 2008 01:13 AM EDT (Updated: August 01, 2008 01:15 AM EDT)
views: 79 | rating: 10/10 (7 votes) | comments: 14

Isn't it funny how fast blue eyes turn grey....                          

Don't you think its crazy how one second your life is perfect and you think you really know a guy and then the second he has you.....its over....you barely talk he's in love with her and your in love with him....until some perfect creature comes along....he's beautiful...you can't help but stare and then hes gone so you try and try to find him again hoping he feels the same and then you do...and lifes perfect.....and your just waiting for something to go wrong now.....

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Comments: 14

William Dotani Aug 1, 2008, 7:14am EDT
You express your feeling well. You should write a new poem and let your voice come out on the page.
I'd prefer to see this in stanza form.
Donna S. Aug 1, 2008, 1:24pm EDT
sounds like you have been hurt before.
kendra s. Aug 2, 2008, 2:43pm EDT
this is a rough draft
Rony J. Aug 6, 2008, 10:09pm EDT
Sounds painful
M & M. Nov 16, 2008, 2:46pm EST
You write so well. Thank you for sharing this lovely lesson of life. It's so true.
Angela A. Nov 17, 2008, 2:42pm EST
You have a very great beginning here.
And, with some polish, this can be a truly amazing piece of work.
If you need any help, I have some experience with poems, and have some ideas.
Rosa See Ya Nov 18, 2008, 1:02pm EST
Yes, put it in stanza form. It's good poetry. Keep writing.
Donna S. Nov 26, 2008, 4:38pm EST
Keep writing baby!
Tracy Fabre Dec 9, 2008, 1:47pm EST
Yeah.... things can change in an instant. My explanation for one such event in my life is that the guy HAS to have been abducted by an alien and replaced by an inferior clone one night. It's the only thing that makes sense. :-)
kendra s. Dec 26, 2008, 1:57am EST
Thanks for the comments.

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