by Steph-in-NE .....
Member since:
June 22, 2007

one open mouth too soon

July 25, 2009 12:51 AM EDT
views: 114 | comments: 31


OK now I see where your mouth open before you thinks comes in,,,,, In my case here it goes….

Today my niece called all upset, her so called friend stolen her aunt Gucci $500 purse, in my mind why would anyone pay that much for a purse,, not sure. Well she is all upset and didn’t know what to tell the aunt. She is the aunt on my brother in law side,…

I told her to be honest and explain that this person stolen it and you are sorry for it being gone. No, she comes up with another idea,, I got my child support yesterday, they serve child support in a credit card fashion, and she got back pay and all for 6 months worth,, over $800...

Here is where my mouth opens to fast,, I say “ don’t be a stupid idiot, you can’t do that. She got mad at me and tells me that I don’t understand. W T F.. I don’t understand,, my kid are fighting like hell to get a decent job to take care of her family along with her husband. I my self don’t get that extra child support, even though my ex owes me over $2800. Yet wont pay because my kids are grown,, I don’t understand,, FYI  I get his taxes when he files  so I do get something sometimes..

I said fine be the stupid brat, and do just that. She was in tears,, and called her step mom. Didn’t tell her about the purse,, just said she was upset I called her stupid, and a brat. About two hours later I get a call from the other mommy( I call her that ) she is sweet at first, then goes off on me, the niece is trying so hard to work and go to school and raise a kid alone,, We need to be more compassionate,,,, Wait on gosh darn minute, Did the great kid tell you about the purse “NO”,, did she tell you she got $800 this week “NO”, and how she was going to buy the aunt a new purse again “NO”!!! Man I can feel her face getting hotter and hotter,, She then said sorry to me, and will handle it on her end,,

WOW and I don’t understand,,,,,

Thanks for me letting of my steam,,,



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Comments: 31

Nora Davenport Jul 25, 2009, 1:16am EDT
Oh my gosh, $500 for one purse??? That's insane, in the first place! There was one time, long ago that I bought a purse online and paid around $100 for it, but that was it.....then, later on I regretted it! How awful, though, that a purse was stolen, with $800 in it. Something like that, well, I'd always be carrying it with me!!!!
Sounds like one difficult situation there!!!
Steph-in-NE ..... Jul 25, 2009, 1:23am EDT
no she had $800- in child support to pay for a new one for her aunt,,, it was not in the purse,,
Debbie W. Jul 25, 2009, 1:19am EDT
I don't think you said anything out of sorts. She needs to get her friends and priorities straight.
Shirley ♡ ☮ M. Jul 25, 2009, 1:25am EDT
It is a lie in my eyes when you don't tell the whole story. I'm glad you let the 'other mommy' know.
Heidi Cole Jul 25, 2009, 1:32am EDT
If the aunt is upset she can file a police report for the stolen property. I don't know why people don't use common sense very often. I mean, really people, it's not that hard.
Ava's Mom (formerly known as Robiyah) Jul 27, 2009, 12:43pm EDT
That's sort of what I was thinking.
April H. Jul 25, 2009, 2:08am EDT
I agree the police should be called and this be reported as stolen and the police just might get the purse back once they talk to the friend, can not believee she wanted to use her child support to pay her aunt back. If she does that she actually is breaking the laws of her child support, that money must be spent on her children and if it isws not she can get in legal trouble.
Linda T. Jul 25, 2009, 2:34am EDT
Some pieces of this puzzle are missing. Was she covering for the friend so the friend doesn't get in trouble? Did she see the friend taking it and do nothing to stop her? If she is wanting to replace the purse so that the Aunt does not find out and the friend does not get in trouble than her thinking is a bit warped. However if she is not sticking by this friend and willing to turn her in and confess to the Aunt then I can understand wanting to offer to replace the purse because she feels somewhat responsible. If she is feeling responsible she could try working something out with the Aunt to repay her. If a friend of mine stole something from my family member I would feel responsible and want to replace the purse. That friend would also be turned in to the police.
Steph-in-NE ..... Jul 25, 2009, 2:54am EDT
I am not sure of them pieces see I dont understand LOL...
Linda T. Jul 25, 2009, 2:55am EDT
Well if she only told you bits of the story than how can you not think she is being foolish.
Rob Appell Jul 25, 2009, 5:28am EDT
It's a noble move of her wanting to replace the purse...but not at the expense of the child. The money is called child support...because it's to go for supporting the child. It's not called buy-auntie-a-new-purse support. She's right in wanting to replace the purse if she can't get it back from her so-called friend (which she probably won't be able to do, let alone get her friend to admit she stole it), but it's not right of her to take away from her child to buy the replacement with. If she feels that responsible, I agree with her working out a way to pay for it, but not use her child support payment.
Rob Appell Jul 25, 2009, 5:31am EDT
And if her auntie has a $500 purse, it sounds like auntie has enough money to go out and buy her own replacement. Damn, that's a lot of money for a handbag. That $500 could buy me groceries for the next 4 or 5 months...or pay for a month's rent for me. It must be nice to be that rich.
Sophie S. Jul 25, 2009, 5:39am EDT
I disagree though. It is an expensive purse, but regardless of how much money the aunt has, she should be compensated for what was hers. I dont think the niece should have borrowed it to begin with if she could not afford to replace it if something happened.

And I know a lot of people who do not have the money to buy designer purses but spend their rent, car payments or pull out credit just to buy the one piece. Dumb, yes. I won't do it, but there are some people.

She should talk to her aunt and work out payments or something.
Sophie S. Jul 25, 2009, 5:36am EDT
There is a lot that is wrong with that scenario. But, what I don't get is why she would borrow out a purse worth that much if she cannot afford to replace it. And yes, Gucci is that much, but people buy them as pieces that they will keep for years. If you cannot afford to replace a piece that you borrowed, regardless of what happened to it, then you should not be borrowing it at all.

I hope it all works out for her, but I feel bad for only the aunt who is the one getting stiffed in the end.
Steph-in-NE ..... Jul 25, 2009, 1:59pm EDT
I also think it was dumb of the aunt to give it to her,, no I am not giddy over the aunt, we do have our difference,, yet if I had a $500 purse, I would not give it out to anyone,,,,
Fran S. Jul 25, 2009, 6:48am EDT
i guess she just wanted to say it out loud, she didn't really want any advice..... I have learned to try as hard as I can NOT to give advice even when asked!
fancy c. Jul 25, 2009, 8:03am EDT
oh my
K D Lovett Jul 25, 2009, 8:20am EDT
If someone tells me something that I feel they would be making a mistake if they did it, then I have two options. One, I can keep my mouth shut and let them speak their mind and learn from their own mistakes. That doesn't usually work for me. I tend to feel too guilty for not stopping them from making an idiot of themselves. Option two is the one I normally choose. That is why several of my family members take spells not talking to me. I tell them what I think. Sometimes they get mad because they know it is a stupid idea or something they shouldn't be doing. Then they stay away and don't talk to me for awhile. Problem is they don't realize that they are actually doing me a favor when they stay away. Then, I don't have to worry about their crazy plans for awhile.
d d. Jul 25, 2009, 8:38am EDT
1) the aunt doesn't know the purse was stolen? both girls at one time were somewhere they shouldn't have been (ie.aunts closet? bedroom?)
2) if the aunt knew, she would try to get it back by going to the police or going to the girls mother. so apparently, she still doesn't know.. buying a new pocketbook..the aunt wouldn't figure it out? Hey, this purse isn't mine.
3) Never use money earmarked for children on materialistic things.

You were right to tell the mother and try to teach the daughter to walk the good life.
What a mess!
Kim B. Jul 25, 2009, 12:58pm EDT
Really, big mess. And very stupid spending child support on a purse that cost that much. Beyond belief
APE 131313 Jul 25, 2009, 1:28pm EDT
Anyone with a handbag that expensive should have Insurance on their home that would cover a loss............... as long as a police report was made.
Donna Besso Jul 25, 2009, 4:33pm EDT
The most I spend on a purse is $20.00-and I use it for years. Child support-what the heck is THAT? I'm owed tons of money, and will never see any of it. I'd be telling on the "friend" in a heartbeat, and keeping my child support for just what it's meant to be-CHILD support-not spending $500. on a purse. Why is she so eager to replace the purse??
Lori A Jul 25, 2009, 5:33pm EDT
I could never figure out the expensive purse thing either I have 1 purse that I got at the flea market and it works fine anyone paying that much for a purse has got way to much money to burn and I also agree that the child support should be for the child not buying a new expensive purse . I use to buy those high end purses at church rummage sales and sell them on ebay ,I made quite a living doing that - even used those things have value maybe she could find one like it on ebay and not have to spend to much if she is determined to replace it . Sorry you had such a bunch of drama going on its all just crazy
M & M. Jul 25, 2009, 7:16pm EDT
Oh dear, well, I'm on your side dear. And, you said what you felt, and you were honest. If she cannot take it, too bad for her. I don't get her side at all.
Deloris Wright Jul 26, 2009, 5:03pm EDT
This sounds like some thing my grandaughter would do. $500. for a purse is crazy.
Marilyn M. Jul 26, 2009, 7:00pm EDT
I don't understand anyone - even rich people - buying purses that expensive. I have one relative who makes about twice what President Obama thinks is rich and she wouldn't even think of buying something expensive. (She also uses coupons to shop.)
Elsie Duggan Jul 26, 2009, 10:01pm EDT
Stephanie, I think as someone else said up there, the Aunt should be told and she probably does have home owners insurance or renters, I do, and it would cover something like a very expensive purse if you lost it or it was stolen. Otherwise you are right about
not spending the child support money to replace the purse, she should arrange to pay it off or have the friend that lost it pay it off at a rate the Aunt would accept, but I think it should be reported to the police too, that is an expensive piece of property to be stolen or lost. take care, love you Stephanie
Wow, Steph,
First, you didn't do anything wrong. You're so right and something's not right here though, even if she replaced the purse (who on earth would buy one that expensive in the first place and they *have* them that expensive? LOL), what about whatever was in her old one? Wouldn't she notice that things were....umm, missing? Like the contents of the purse and the fact that the one she got back was brand-new?
CHILD SUPPORT, for those of us who ever got it, (which didn't happen to usually be me, but I never said anything about it), is for THE CHILD, not for an expensive purse. What you said, was/is exactly right. And yes, a police report ought to be filled out.

Marilyn
*Hugs*
Quirky Jessi Jul 27, 2009, 11:50am EDT
I will never understand why people pay that much for purses either. :(
Pamela O. Jul 27, 2009, 1:33pm EDT
Wow Steph. You did the right thing. It was her responsibility to tell her aunt or mom (I can't figure it out lol) about the purse. $500 is way too much for one, but some people must have money to burn lol. I am glad that you got it straightened out. I don't think you did anything wrong!

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