Why Nature Has It in for ME!

I  go out for a walk in the woods: An old man follows me into the woods and says, "Get out of here lady, there's a reason we call it,"Copperhead mountain."

I go for a walk in the woods:  I meet an old woman who is looking for herbs.  (Near Salem, Massachusetts) The only thing that separates our two houses is a stone wall about 12 inches high.  I step over and introduce myself.   I say hello. 

 She says, "This aint' your land, lady"  I reply, "I'm new here, and just wanted to say hi, to my neighbor."

"Well I don't want to say hi to you or any of your neighbors.  Do you know I heard the tries scream when they built your house?" 

I answered: "Did the trees not scream when they built yours?"

She hissed and said. " Look, look, do you see it?"

What?

"The window.  His window."

I peered through the trees but couldn't see anything.  She pulled me and pointed again at my neighbor's upstairs window.

"If I can see his window, he can see me. I don't like you people.  Don't be comin' round me again."

She screamed at my daughter, 'What are you stupid?  Don't you know a nest of yellow jackets when you see them?"

I picked my daughter up and headed home.  I turned one more time and said, "Maybe you can come over for coffee sometime."

"Never, I hate you people, and keep that kid off my property.  Understand?  Don't talk to me again. 'm not friendly."

My daughter called me shortly after the incident and after telling her the story. 

She prayed, "Oh Lord, please teach my mother not to go into the woods with a witch.  I thought she would know better."

There have been other incidents, but I won't bore you with them.  Suffice it to say, I like indoors.  Indoors likes me.  I don't like witches, and I don't like Massachusetts.  That woman was not the first witch I met there.  I moved back to Oklahoma, and my next door neighbor is a youth minister's wife and my closest friend.