Clean jokes to perk people up

I laughed at these when I read them in my email.

A young man was strolling down a street behind an assisted living center. As he passed the large building with a fence around it, he heard a group of people chanting "Thirteen, thirteen, thirteen, thirteen" over and over again. Curious, he tried to see over the fence, but couldn't.

Then he spotted a hole in one of the boards and leaned over to take a look.He had just managed to see some old people sitting in deckchairs chanting, when a finger came out of nowhere and poked him in the eye.

As he staggered back, the old people started chanting, "Fourteen, fourteen, fourteen, fourteen..."    

Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate. 

Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A: A fsh.   

Negotiations between union members and their employer were at an impasse. The union denied that their workers were flagrantly abusing their contract's sick-leave provisions.

One morning at the bargaining table, the company's chief negotiator held aloft the morning edition of the newspaper, "This man," he announced, "Called in Sick yesterday!"

There on the sports page, was a photo of the supposedly ill employee, who had just won a local golf tournament with an excellent score.

The silence in the room was broken by a union negotiator. "Wow," he said. "Think of what kind of score he could have had if he hadn't been sick!"