A few clean jokes

I thought these were cute when I found them in my email.

Our minister announced that admission to a church social event would be six dollars per person. "However, if you're over 65," he said, "the price will be only $5.50."

From the back of the congregation, a woman's voice rang out, "Do you really think I'd give you that information for only 50 cents?"   

Animal, mostly cat, questions

Q. Why does a tiger have stripes?

A. So he won't be spotted.

Q. What do you call a cat who does tricks?

A. A magic kit.

Q. What kind of work does a weak cat do?

A. Light mouse work.

Q. Why did the mother cat put stamps on her kittens?

A. Because she wanted to mail a litter.

Q. Which state has a lot of dogs and cats?

A. Petsylvania.

Q. Which game did the cat want to play with the mouse?

A. Catch.

Q. What do English cats drink in the afternoon?

A. Kit-tea.

Q. Where did the kittens go on their class trip?

A. To a mewseum.

Q. How do you call a barber cat?

A. Yell . . . "Hair Kitty!"   

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A cute oldie.

A wealthy contractor liked to know something about all the employees who worked for him. One day he came upon a young man who was expertly counting out a large wad of the firm's cash.

The contractor asked the man, "Where did you get your financial training, young man?"

"Yale," the man answered.

"That's good," said the contractor, who was an advocate of higher learning."What's your name?" he asked.

And the man answered, "Yohn Yackson."