It's not too early to start thinking...and it's never too late to make plans. Can you remember back to when you were younger and this time of year came rolling along? There were so many reasons to revel in the coming of the end of May. We knew it meant summer was pretty much here with sunshine and warm weather to enjoy in the months ahead. It also meant school would soon be letting out so we could kick up our heels and have fun for quite a few weeks. Family gatherings, parties and picnics were on tap; festive occassions for all. There was also tradition.
As a youngster myself, though I didn't have a lot to look forward to, even I would excitedly anticipate the arrival of Memorial Day for all those reasons...and more. Growing up in a small town meant, many times, you'd have to find your own fun. Being raised in a community that gave the entire country a national holiday; there were activities held that all worked into their busy schedules. Life here would grind to a halt, so that we could remember those whose lives came to an abrupt end in the past while serving in the military. For you who don't know by now, I hail from Waterloo, New York; the official birthplace of Memorial Day.
While we did, and continue to do, many of the same things the rest of you participate in on this Monday holiday, there was so much more to include into our celebration. Observing Memorial Day in our own unique way, when I was little, I used to think everyone else across America was doing the same thing at the same time we did here. As I grew older, I learned the commemoration was different elsewhere around our land; my little village was quite special in the way we paid hommage to our fallen heroes.
It was a time for baseball, apple pie and the red, white and blue...a time for relaxation and reflection. My first memory of Memorial Day wasn't the events of the day. It was a question I posed to my parents...why do we have two of them? We had a three day weekend with Monday marked on the calendar as the holiday. How come we got to celebrate a second time on another date? This is where it all started; where Memorial Day was "invented". I would have rather it been where Christmas or Halloween was created, but I was happy with the explaination. Not too many places were special enough to have bragging rights about being the birthplace of a holiday. That made me feel special, too, being from a town as important as mine.
Our Monday observation was somewhat uneventful; dad would have the day off from work and school was closed. It kind of felt like a repeat of Sunday. We'd rest around the house, sit a spell on the front porch and watch people go by and have a small cook-out later in the day. Mom would busy herself in the kitchen preparing salads and a dessert. My father was in charge of grilling steaks for himself and mom while flipping a couple hamburgers and hot dogs for my sister and me. We'd have a midday meal with leftovers later on; then some television before bedtime to get ready for a return to normal life the next day. I didn't quite understand what it was all about, but I took the day off.
Later in the week, on whatever day May 30th fell, was quite different. We'd awaken early, have a quick breakfast and get ready to leave the house. Most in town would do the same. The citizens of the community would join together in "Veteran's Plot" at Maplegrove Cemetary for opening ceremonies. There would be speakers and patriotic music by the high school band. The flag would be raised to the top of a pole; then lowered halfway; while a bugler played a song I'd learn was called "Taps". When I asked why that was done, I was told to remember the men who were buried in the graves before us marked by small headstones and adorned with flags and flowers. When the services were over, the residents returned home or went to work. School would be closed, again, but the adults already had their day off.
The day was spent playing and watching TV and when dad arrived home from his job, we'd rush through dinner to get ready to go downtown. We needed to show up early to get a good spot to watch the large parade that marched through the middle of town to the village park. The street was packed with people and all traffic was stopped so the lengthy procession could pass through. There were bands and soldiers, police cars and fire trucks, boy and girl scouts...lots of people with lots of flags. We paid attention intensely not being distracted by vendors hawking balloons, cotton candy and the likes. This was a solemn and somber time; not a big party, no "carnival" atmosphere. As the last unit passed, the spectators would fall in line and follow the parade to LaFayette Park, where it seemed the whole town had assembled.
The mayor would greet everyone and thank those from out of town for visiting. Speaker after speaker would take to the podium to deliver their addresses...General Logan's orders marking the date to celebrate, the Gettysburg Address, speeches on heroism and those who gave their lives for freedom, politicians praising the military and townspeople alike. The high school bands would join in performing various patriotic songs. All those gathered would join in singing our national anthem; thousands of voices accompanying as the bands played on. At the conclusion of the ceremonies, an honor guard would fire off a 21-gun salute and "Taps" would echo from the corners of the park while the flag was raised to full staff once again. The parade would re-form and march a couple blocks to the V.F.W. post home for refreshments and comradery with all in attendance invited to join. After, a stoic crowd would head back home with a sense of peacefulness overtaking this tiny town.
That was when I was young. Now that I've grown older; nothing has changed on Memorial Day here, except my age. We still have our early morning graveside services to mark the beginning of observation and reflection; no matter what day of the week May 30th may fall on. We still hold Memorial Day on its original date. There's a big parade in the early evening through downtown to our village park, followed by readings, song and ceremony. Our V.F.W. holds their reception after to thank those who participated and for friends and neighbors to socialize. And plans for the next year's celebration begin immediately with many who took part signing up for the following May's commemorative event.
Do you remember how you spent Memorial Day when you were young? Do you even recall what you did last year? How do you observe this patriotic holiday? I'd really like to know being from the birthplace of this commemoration. What does Memorial Day mean to you? Many don't observe its true intentions. It's just a day off from work or away from classes. Many treat it just as one big party; family get-togethers, picnics, an afternoon of baseball; just a day to rest and forget about everything else. It's sad to say, but lots of people don't even get the concept behind this special time; they don't even know what Memorial Day is all about. Are you one of them? Some think it's a day to salute the fighting men and women of our armed forces. It is, in a way, but not exactly. We have Armed Forces Day for that. It's really a time of remembrance; honoring those in the military who lost their lives over the past 141 years; those who made the ultimate sacrifice by dying during wartime in the name of liberty and justice for all...so freedom may continue to ring across our great nation.
They paid with their lives so you may gather with loved ones, enjoy a festive meal, take in one of America's favorite pasttimes. They died so the United States can remain the envy of the world. Enjoy your day; have fun at whatever you do. Will they be a part of your observance? They fought for you; people they didn't even know; for a future bright with hope and expectations. Did they die in vain? Have they fought for naught? They didn't plan on laying down their lives, but were filled with pride when they passed because they made a difference. We may not have known most. That doesn't mean we shouldn't be proud of their efforts. You don't have to attend services or even take in a parade to participate in the true meaning of Memorial Day. It takes but a moment of your time; a small portion of your day. Simply remember them so they'll never be forgotten...say a short prayer so they may continue to rest in peace...salute our flag to show your appeciation for the freedoms we have; the reasons they died. Can you pause to include our brave fighting men and women in your celenration? I'd really like to know...how will you mark the memories of Memorial Day this year?
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Comments: 32
my daughter works every memorial day weekend so it is just me and the dogs ;-)
We generally had a picnic on this day, and there was always a parade in town.
Thanks for the article, Rob.
Thanks.
Thank you for this article.
Every Memorial day the whole school (K-12) and various groups such as the volunteer fire department and the veterans groups would march in a big parade. The parade would make 3 stops at which the whole community gathered. The first stop was at the harbor (the town was on Lake Ontario). There one of the local clergy would give a short talk about the bravery of our military at sea and several color guards would fire blanks in a salute (out over the water) to honor those who sacrificed their lives at sea. The 2nd stop was at the military cemetery (about a half mile away) where another clergyman would give a short talk and the guard would again fire a military salute in honor of the fallen. The final stop was at the civilian cemetary (across the street from the military cemetary) where there would be another short talk (but I don't remember a military salute being fired there) honoring those veterans who were buried there.
The parade was very exciting for the smaller school children - we were each given flags to wave as we marched. It was a very nice way to give honor and respect to those who fought for our country.
brothers, cousins and friends who were buried in the veterans area. Even as a small child I realized how important these individuals were and how proud we all were of them.
My Father would spend what seem like an hour there -- he would say a prayer, touch there stone and leave an American flag & my mother a red rose. MY FATHER, WOULD ALSO LEAVE WITH A TEAR IN HIS EYES. As, a Marine who served 43 years in the South Pacific during World War II...My father very really, talk about his time in the service...it was too painful for him. He only would say how proud he was to serve his country. I know now he was one of the fortunate it ones that came home alive -- feeling grateful for being alive -- yet, wondering and feeling a bit guilty that he was survived. My father, loved his wife, his children and his country. No one, who has proudly, served our country should have to ever feel that way...but, they did.
MY mother & father have passed away. We, now have a Memorial Service for them...The family will all gather & all go to the cemetery to honor all who they did and now my parents. God bless all our brave men & women who are now serving our country, have served our country and let's all pray they will be home soon and safely back where they belong with their families and love ones.
Thank you, for a great article.
As bad as it MAY seem to some, old habits are hard to break. I still usually go to the cemetaries that are near that have any of our family members in them. This year will be extremely hard but it'll be done.
I do understand what this day was actually started for and I will be honoring the fallen servicemean/women... we just remember our loved ones period on this day.
This year there will be no cookout or celebration as a dear cousin of mines, that died unexpectedly 5 months ago, widow was killed last night in a car accident. The family will be getting together but to decide on the who will be raising their children. Sorry for the rant, lol... I'm beat and am going to bed now!
Of course, the dock wasn't good enough. First we would take our shoes off to dip our toes. They had lost battle when they let us do that. Soon we were at the end of the dock trying to dip our toes into the lake. That's the "natural jumping off, falling into the lake, I can't be in trouble cause it is an accident" position. Sixty degrees, sixty degrees and raining...it was all good. I was in the lake and loving it.
All family picnics (and other gatherings as well) were hotdogs and grape soda for the kids. I still hate hot dogs and grape soda...grape flavor in all its many forms. I always felt "less than" when adults announced that kids would be eating this cause they weren't old enough to appreciate hamburgers, or steak or seafood or whatever else. It seemed condescending to say the least. It was always better to be in the company of my cousins than to have to hang out with the adults. But, that's what holidays were for...having a bunch of kids to hang with, to get into trouble with, to bounce ideas about life off of, to just be a kid without adult supervision.
Childhood was a more innocent time, a time before war and its tragic consequences were real in any sense. It was a time for battle of the wills between children and adults. Bloodshed was rare and minimal and easily set right by the mandatory apology to a sibling or a friend. Our biggest disputes centered around whether the ball was fair or foul.
To take the leap from that place to a place where we vote for officials who send citizens off to war to put there lives on the line for the principals they believe in is a big step. For some of who volunteer to put lives on the line and for those of us who stay behind and honor the dead soldier and the returning hero know that that is in itself is an difficult accomplishment. But, then again, no one every said growing up was any small feat.
On Memorial Day, I honor those fallen in battle for their valiant efforts for my sake. But I also honor those whose battle with living has ended. I silently grieve for those no longer with us, for those taken too early and those finally at rest. When I remember I give life and respect to a memory.
I have now also finally accepted this to my "Everything" group, sorry for any delays...
Sorry it took so long to get back here but I have a thought for you. The local community college I just graduated from had a chapter of a group called "Soldier's Angels." They did many wonderful things: drives to send phone cards & needed supplies to soldiers, dinners for spouses back home, Easter Egg hunt for the children of soldiers. They did many, many things from a grassroots level. While I have not been involved in the group, it is my understanding that Soldier's Angels of Northeast CT was part of a larger movement called Soldier's Angels. Perhaps that is a place to start looking for answer to how to get involved.