The things I've learned...

living in a city with several million residents.

1. Now matter how bad you think you've got it, there is a bum there to remind you otherwise.

2. Now matter how much you think you've learned, there is always some other way to educate yourself.

3.  If you see a mysterious puddle on the sidewalk and it hasn't rained in days, its probably urine.

4. Even if there are many garbage cans along the street, people will still use the street as the garbage can.

5. Mice aren't scary, rats are.

6. Eventhough smokers think "the world is their ashtray", gum chewers are much worse. Cigarette buts don't stick to your nice shoes.

7. Never wear a short skirt or shorts on the subway. You are never quite sure what the back of your thighs might stick to. (See #3)

8. If it smells like urine, it probably is.

9. Garbage day is the worst day to go for a walk during the summer months.

10. When in Chinatown or the meatpacking district,  and you see a mysterious liquidy red puddle, step over it. It is probably blood or bloody urine.

11. The stains on the sidewalk that have a dark outline, a long "run off", and a circular center, they are probably old urine stains.

12. No matter how many bathrooms may be available at local bars, restaurants, coffee shops, malls, boutiques, stores, etc. men will still piss on the sidewalk if they want to.

13. If you look like you really need a cab, and try to hail one, they won't stop for you. If you don't need one, they will creep up along side you and honk.

14. Public parks are not only for recreation, they are for sleeping and peeing.

15. If you get "holler'd at", don't think of it as offensive, think of it as a compliment. Oh wait a second it could have been the 30 other women walking around you on the sidewalk.