by John Philipp

Member since:
August 10, 2006

Thought~Byte No.178

November 04, 2009 12:16 AM EST

views: 142 | comments: 64

Thought~Byte No.178

Concept and words by John Philipp. Drawings by Phil Frank.

(The comments below are where the wisdom is found.)

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Comments: 64

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 12:17am EST

Mini Thought~Bytes (words without drawings) appear every day on my Twitter page. If you're on Tweeter please follow me and I'll follow you.

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John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 12:17am EST

Thought~Bytes are posted every Wednesday. To see all Thought~Bytes and get an email when new ones are posted, please join Thought~Bytes

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Jan S. Nov 4, 2009, 1:21am EST

This accounts for the countless, individual points of view and the amazing variety of people in the world.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 9:58am EST

Certainly a contributing factor, Jan.

It also explains a lot of arguments.

Jan S. Nov 4, 2009, 6:48pm EST

Indeed. Those arguments spring from our inability to see from another's point of view.

To understand another's life, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if you still don't agree, you'll be a mile away and will have his shoes.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:46pm EST

Great phrase, Jan. Thank you for that.

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~Sia McKye~ Nov 4, 2009, 1:42am EST

That's true. But really, how else can we do it without a reference point? Which happens to be our experience?

Robert - just a simple man - B. Nov 4, 2009, 5:00am EST

Good Point Sia, another reference point is our 'knowledge'. (For instance we have the knowledge that 'Gravity Sucks')

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 9:59am EST

Sia, I guess it's a question of a) how much editing we do and b) being aware that that editing is taking place.

~Sia McKye~ Nov 4, 2009, 10:54am EST

Yah, Robert, and applying the our knowledge of people in general.

John, C) keeping an open mind which plays back to your other thought byte.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:45pm EST

Nice connection, Sia.

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Vinod Sailes Nov 4, 2009, 4:59am EST

John Philipp : That is quite ok. But then the second edition is never released with appropriate alterations. Despite all the brain-storming done by the editor, the matter goes to print without the edited modifications.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:00am EST

Well said, Vinod.

Or it goes to print without the editor checking the edits with the author.

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JOHN BECK Nov 4, 2009, 5:14am EST

We tend especially to assign motive by conjecture based on our prejudices, then accept those conjectures as "truth".

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:03am EST

Very important aspect to this Byte, John.

We do assign motives to others (maybe out of our 'need to know') and given how complex humans are, what are the odds that we called that motive correctly or that our own motives might be suspect in how we came to that particular conclusion.

JOHN BECK Nov 4, 2009, 10:11am EST

And in that way we "edit".

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Larry M. Nov 4, 2009, 7:11am EST

That must be the "alter, adapt, or refine" meaning of the word "edit."

If we didn't "edit" others actions we could not understand them nor could we empathize with them. Editing is essential. But we can also completely distort their true feelings or situation by seeing what we expect to see and hearing what we expect to hear.

For example, Marilyn has a post about an Obama speech which she hears as being disrespectful to the Bible and I hear as something else entirely. One of us (or both) is completely wrong about what's going on there. We both are editing what we see and hear.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:04am EST

Right, Larry. We have to edit but we an overedit or be unaware that editing is going on - for us as well as others.

Not checking how someone else has edited/understood what you said is a prime cause of misunderstandings.

Larry M. Nov 4, 2009, 10:07am EST

It's also a good reason to present one's self consistently. Mixed signals (like dressing one way and talking another) are quite likely to be improperly edited.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:48pm EST

Excellent point. When people change their behavior people seem to need to come up with a reason why.

Of course, asking is rarely the option chosen.

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Linda T. Nov 4, 2009, 8:01am EST

When we see how someone has accomplished something we assume we can do it differently with better results.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:05am EST

Certainly a different slant on this, Linda. Something to ponder.

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MrsRoad Runner Nov 4, 2009, 8:16am EST

mmmm Why we clash so much with people who are like us......
Notice we see differences in people, but when someone has the same attributes as us, it can grind us to our last nerve. We do not understand why the other person irritates us like they do.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:07am EST

Maybe because we are so similar, Mrs R, we think they should be editing the same way we are, yet that doesn't happen.

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Kushal Poddar Nov 4, 2009, 8:23am EST

Editing has much to do with the spectacle editor wears. Right, sir John.

sun on the guard’s gun

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:07am EST

It does, Kushal, or "spectacles" is a metaphor for editing.

Dennis Gilman Nov 4, 2009, 12:03pm EST

Some of the rose coloured glasses come with wipers. Did you know that?

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 3:03pm EST

8 )

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Chas Andrews Nov 4, 2009, 11:18am EST

I can attest to both sides of this one. I've always claimed that we call out others on the things we don't like about ourselves.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 3:04pm EST

Definitely of item that drives the editing process, Chas. Thanks.

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Dennis Gilman Nov 4, 2009, 11:59am EST

It is supposed to have the benefit of letting us learn from the errors of others. Trouble is it also makes us learn from our own mistake of not immitating a good example.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 3:04pm EST

Good point, Dennis.

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Gina Robinson Nov 4, 2009, 12:08pm EST

Just echoing Sia's point. We don't have any other perspective than our own experiences.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 3:05pm EST

I'd like to think we do, Gina. The metaphor that works for me is looking through the eyes of experience.

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Jennifer K. Nov 4, 2009, 12:28pm EST

This is very true John. We tend to edit what others think or do by seeing it through our own experiences.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 3:06pm EST

Yes, Jennifer, and by what we'd like them to be thinking or doing.

Jennifer K. Nov 4, 2009, 3:26pm EST

Exactly!!!

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LaRue B. Nov 4, 2009, 2:47pm EST

When some one does something, we want to do it better.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 3:06pm EST

There is also that comparative facet, LaRue. Thanks.

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blaine d. Nov 4, 2009, 4:52pm EST

always will!

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 5:48pm EST

Guess so, Blaine.

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Vivian A. Nov 4, 2009, 6:19pm EST

This is precisely why I never try to figure out another's motivations, utter waste of time. Tell me or forget about it, 'cause I'm not going to wander through the thousands of possibilities.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:50pm EST

Many people I know don't wander through all those options, Vivian. They settle immediately upon an answer.

Almost always wrong when they check it out.

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Glome . . . Nov 4, 2009, 10:20pm EST

Mirroring is a big part of growth. Mirroring various agenda's on to others; their experiences into our own memory banks so that we have a head start when we get there :) But being observant and keeping the truth out front is what makes it work.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:51pm EST

Good points, Glome.

I had forgotten about "mirroring." Thanks for reminding us.

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Beth G. Nov 4, 2009, 10:22pm EST

This is so very true! I try to keep an open mind about people and things,but undoubtably I can be judgemental at times.I guess the key thing to do is aim for balance, and do the best you can.

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 10:53pm EST

That's always the answer, Beth, to most anything.

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Georgiana S. Nov 4, 2009, 11:00pm EST

Inotherwords, 'relate before you relate"!

John Philipp Nov 4, 2009, 11:59pm EST

Very clever, Georgiana. Yup, that's it.

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Sheila Deeth Nov 5, 2009, 1:43am EST

Nice. Certainly thought-provoking.

John Philipp Nov 5, 2009, 5:29pm EST

Thanks, Sheila.

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Sandre M. Nov 5, 2009, 3:23pm EST

I noticed this in myself when my children would tell me something a classmate said or did during the day that my child didn't care for. I would point out that the person might have had an argument with their parents before leaving home, or that they might not have gotten sleep the night before or any number of things that might explain why they had said or done what they did. Then I realized how handy it was to apply the same ideas to experiences I had and just wondering about what had happened to the other person that day before they said or did what I found disagreeable allowed me to take that mental "step back" that let me examine what they might have been thinking.

John Philipp Nov 5, 2009, 5:31pm EST

Good example, Sandre. Also when people say something that hurts your feelings. It is rare that that was their reason for doing that. They are working on another issue of their own and you happen to be there.

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Beaker (just Beaker) Nov 5, 2009, 4:31pm EST

This is why the actions of certain folks are utterly incomprehensible. With age and experience, things begin to seem less "crazy"--except to those who choose to become fossils, of course.

John Philipp Nov 5, 2009, 5:32pm EST

I have found that to be true as well, Beaker. Thanks.

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Angela A. Nov 5, 2009, 6:43pm EST

Sort of an excuse?

John Philipp Nov 7, 2009, 10:18am EST

I think it's how the brain works, Angela. If we are aware of that we can turn it to our advantage.

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Sandi S. Nov 6, 2009, 12:43pm EST

YES... that is so true!

John Philipp Nov 7, 2009, 10:18am EST

Thanks, Sandi.

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Bill W. Nov 7, 2009, 10:11am EST

I might of said "interpret", but you're the writer. I was trying to work with the actions of a serial killer (there was one on TV last night) and I could neither edit nor interpret so I digressed to watching my bride reading recipes, sipping wine and watching CSI all at once. I couldn't edit that either. I'll report back after golf, see if I edit a better score from watching the dudes I tee off with.

Rest easy

John Philipp Nov 7, 2009, 10:22am EST

:) Good luck on the links.

I can see "interpret." The Byte is yours to do with whatever you want. Each difference in wording leads us down a different path and all paths have value.

(Don't tell anyone but I wrote some of these before I was a "writer," so I welcome any suggestions if you limit them one per customer per Byte :)

Now each Thought~Byte is an image file so changing anything is a hassle.