Gather Friend Application - So you want to be my 300th friend

I noticed when I signed on today that I have 299 connections. I have no idea how I got this many connections, I wasn't trying. I've decided to become a little more picky about my friends and so I have a friend application. Of course I'm cheating a bit since everyone knows I eliminated about 50 connections last week. This is because most had not signed on since before Christmas.

I've slightly modified the questioning from my 200th friend contest. It seems just like yesterday I only had 20 friends. Now here I am with almost 300. Of course I love every one of you - but don't expect me to send you birthday cards. I have learned alot since I made out my 200th friend application. I've learned how to use Articles for me to try and post to my friends. I've learned that it's a good thing to check people who post to my articles and be sure and return the favor. And, I've learned that my chances of keeping on the top 10 rated list are about nonexistance. Yet, because I am stubborn I continue to try.

I should warn you that for some reason my 200th friend is no longer on my list. Wherever she is, I wish her well. I don't know if the demands of being my friend were too tough or what. But anyway, here is the applicatioin to be my 300th friend (If I go on another purge you could be my 250th friend).

1.  Why do you want to be my friend?

a. We have soooo much in common.

b. Bather point whores should stick together.

c. Because I look 10 in that picture and you are a 12 year old looking for a girlfriend.

d. Your mother told you to be nice to the less fortunate.

e. Your goal in life is to establish a social connection so complete that you never have to sign off of Gather.

2. What do you do with your free time ?

a. Think of ways to please me and make me read your posts.

b. Reply to every other gather member reminding them they suck and I don’t.

c. Stalk other gather members who will never be as cool as I am

d. Create multiple i.d.’s so that you can be my double and triple friend.

e. Join every one of my groups and post at least 30 times a day to them.

3. What are you willing to do to be my three hundredth friend?

a. Cartwheels (picture required)

b. Start an elitist group of people who worship me and only me.

c. Read and comment on every one of my article including those about hamster eulogies and frightening birds and then send annoying spam mail and comments to everyone else on Gather about how wonderfully well written they are.

d. Post 500 freebies that all start with the letter K in the comment section of all of my articles

e. Serve as my personal spell checker by correcting my articles and if necc. Swearing at other people who attempt to correct my grammar.

4. How do you feel about politics?

a. Only democrats know how fix anything.

b. Only republicans know how fix anything.

c. Obviously no one has a clue how to fix anything.

d. It isn't the government's job to fix your stupid messes.

e. Government? We have a government?

5. Why are you still reading this?

a. You really had nothing to live for anyway.

b. You want to find out how to respond to actually become number 300.

c. Travis forced you to come here.

d. You've never won anything and finally, now your life can have meaning.

e. It’s not like there is anything else on gather worth reading is there.

From the applicants, I'll choose my 300th friend. Those of you who were already my friend can feel free to suck up and answer this post as many times as you like. I can't choose you again, but in my heart you'll always be my favorite. Well you and everyone else who replied.