Code Orange College Calm

Staying proactive and positive has helped me cope with the college quest.  Loving is launching.  Viewing this process as an adventure in incremental steps, rather than a series of deadlines, has given me a sense of calm.  Ultimately, my daughter, Christina, is responsible for her own success, working for good grades and juggling extracurricular activities.  I’ve partnered with her in researching colleges and supporting her search.

Throughout high school, I’ve offered Christina $50 each quarter she achieved high honor roll, which requires a 3.75 average. I’ve had to pay out more often than not.  Incentives matter.

Summer programs on college campuses allowed Christina to try out academic disciplines. We researched programs on the internet, picked affordable favorites and applied for financial aid.  We didn’t over schedule. She needed a few weeks to play.

We started visiting colleges in Christina’s tenth grade year.  We ate in cafeterias and looked at bulletin boards. We recorded impressions while still fresh, in columns of pros and cons.

College recruitment mail came with ever-increasing frequency.  Thousands of colleges posed overwhelming choice.  We developed criteria for consideration or discard and alphabetically filed the “keepers.”

We looked at SAT scores for a good fit.  If Christina will be surrounded by peers of comparable or slightly less ability, she will shine more than stress.  By her junior year, we had a list of schools, ready to designate the least selective ones as the recipients of her first SAT scores, which reduced the stress of the test.

Experienced parents relieved our trepidation when broaching sticker prices of private colleges.  While public schools are more affordable, private institutions offer more aid.  We found several schools that will work for Christina. We remain flexible, awaiting financial aid offers that will factor in our decision.

While we will contribute to Christina’s education, we expect her to take ownership of this investment.  A dorm and meal plan will meet her basic needs; but she will have to work on campus for extras.  We will allow her to take out loans in her own name up to $10,000 annually and will pay off half when she graduates.

We have equipped Christina with the skills to find her own way.   This is her life, not ours.  As her coach, I delight in the journey and am excited to see where her adventure will lead.