I have been sitting here at starbucks for only a few minutes when a good looking couple walked in for coffee. I could tell there was already friction because she had some attitude walking in the door. She would not even turn to look at him when she ordered her drink and then he ordered his. The credit card must have been declined because she had to reach into her purse to pay for the drinks in cash. That just added gas to the fire and before long they were both screaming at each other about her wasting his money. I thought for sure he was going to hit her and instead he grabbed his coffee cup and smashed it against the wall in the place and walked out. She sat at the table looking down and one of the starbucks employees came out to try and clean up the horrendous mess he made.
How is it that men can grow up and get away with this sort of behavior? I would be afraid of I was living with that maniac and reminds me if the girl I read about on myspace yesterday. She had to have 75 staples to close a wound on her head from when her boyfriend attacked her. She did not press charges and when he came back from drug rehab he beat her to death! I think all the signs of an abuser start too early for women not to be able to see them clearly! A man like the one that was just in here, that could not control his temper like this, is only a hop/skip away from taking out his anger on her. I think she was provoking him to it as well, I think some women honestly believe that men won't hit girls regardless of their attitudes.
Speaking of which, OJ Simpson is back in jail on charges of armed robbery? Geez does that guy know he is not going to keep getting "get out of jail free cards". What do you think, should he get the chair now?
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Comments: 31
Men don't act like this. Little boys throwing a temper tantrum do how ever.
Must second Lisa's comment. Though in some cases violence may be provoke, again no reason for it. On either side of the situation.
It's all about karma in my opinion, what comes around, goes around, he will eventually get 'his'.
My dad was abusive and the first few years of my dating history, I dated abusive men. It took a bit to learn that this was not normal, nor did I have to accept it.
Seeing incidents like you described always brings up the old feelings and it is so hard to watch another woman go through it. I have a lot of anger about it and have to stop myself from going over and socking the guy and getting the girl away. My anger causes me to forget that I am not quite as strong as I think I am and would probably get hurt too!
Look back to the young women that you saw fighting at the mall. What is coming to this world when women are beating up on each other?? As if there aren't enough men standing in line already!
I hope the girl can get up the courage to leave the scum because from what you related she is not safe in that relationship!
I completely understand the idea that there are low self esteem or even some fear issues that keep a woman in an abusive relationship BUT: If the the abuse is physical, it's illegal and the abuser WILL be locked up if you press charges. Please, if this is you, the victim, it ALWAYS escalates. You are NOT responsible for someone else's happiness or their actions. The choice is theirs and theirs alone. He could always walk away if he's angry. He chooses to intimidate, threaten, and hit you. Tough day at work? Tough shit. That's not your problem. The house a mess when he gets home? Kids being noisy? Too damn bad. There are other ways to communicate with the woman you "love".
Nan, I am shocked. What could you possibly do to a guy that would give him the green light for that? I'm sure whatever happened in Starbucks was just a glimpse of what happens at home. Even if she's pushing his buttons, he has the option of removing himself from the situation and or the relationship. Period.
http://www.dvstats.com
http://www.law.fsu.edu/journals/lawreview/downloads/304/kelly.pdf
http://pn.psychiatryonline.org/cgi/content/full/42/15/31-a
http://www.ajph.org/cgi/content/abstract/97/5/941
http://www.csulb.edu/%7Emfiebert/assault.htm
While both genders are equally violent to the point of blood, stitches, knife wounds and gun shots, men inflict fatal damage more often than women.
VAWA ignores the fact that men are victims of DV. Last time VAWA came up for a vote, the Senate comittee purposely heard no differing viewpoints from sources other than feminist groups. There is NO money to protect men and their children from violent intimate partners. I'm sure many here will say men are big enough to protect themselves? If they do, they are classified as the agressor and hauled off to jail. There are two sides to this DV thing, and men and their children are left out in the cold. Beth, it's good that you don't want a man using you for a punching bag. I hope you can see things the other way also. There's one other way that women commit violence against men. It's by proxy, where a woman can act any whay she wants, raising the ire of any male present, then uses other males, or the police, to protect her when things get out of control.
The girl on myspace should have pressed charges .. or the cops should have done so themselves.
I know in michigan woman no longer have a choice. The police will press charges .. even if the woman begs them not to.