Adversity

Originally published in The Trials of Life Gather group. 

Carla G. asked me to re-publish this article in this group with pagination.  

     … I agree that trials are God given.  We must look to these trials as the gift that God meant them to be.  I have a disease very similar to MS.  I won’t tell you the name (AMN) because it's very rare and no one would know what it was.  What's important is that my disease has the exact same outcome as MS; demyelination of my nerves. Besides being painful 24 hours a day, this disease is stealing my ability to walk.  When I was diagnoses 17 years ago, my doctor told me that I would be in a wheelchair within 5 years.  I did not allow that to happen.  I do however walk with a cane.  I just have to take it slowly and I am fine. 

     This trial has greatly affected my life.  Not until recently have I actually thanked God for giving me this disease but now I can almost dailly.  Does that sound crazy to be thankful for a disease?  I am that crazy person.    Because of my disease I have been able to do many things that I wouldn't have been able to do if I was a normal healthy individual.  Of course I can't list every blessing I've received in connection with my disease but I'd like to list a few. 

     First, unfortunately I was forced to retire from a very promising retail management career.  I had worked in retail sales for over 20 years, of which 11 were in management.  I thought I could never be sadder than the day I had to say good bye to productive work and retire.  I was only 35 years old.  Talk about a low point in my life.  It's only through hindsight that I now realize how much of a blessing those sad days were.  Because I was forced to retire I was able to stay home with my son as he was growing up.  I was a Mr. Mom since he was 2 years old.  He is now almost 12.  What man is given that blessing.  Most men have to work 40-60 hours a week and only see their children on weekends or rarely.  I was able to take him to the first day of kindergarten.  I have been at every school activity.  I even was part of the PTA for his elementary school.   

     Another hindsight blessing happened after another low point in my life.  I tried everything but unfortunately my 10 year marriage ended in divorce several years ago.  I'm sure my disease played a part.  I was at home 24 hours a day.  There are very few relationships that can withstand that much time together.  Oh, my wife worked from home too so we were together constantly.  Whatever the reason my ex-wife found someone else she'd prefer to be with and we divorced.  Since I was disabled I could prove to the courts that I could be with my son much more time than my ex-wife so I was awarded day to day custody of my son.  It is wonderful.  Just the two of us; two men making our way in this world.  I love living with my son.  I get to spend all the growing years with him.  I look forward to the future with him too.   

     In addition to being with my son full time, I also had a lot of time on my hands because I had to retire and I was no longer married.  So, I decided to go back to school and finish my degree.  When I originally started college, I was pre-med.  Well, that didn't last long and I chose to pursue a computer science degree.  Again, unfortunately my family needed me and I dropped out after only 60 credit hours.  Now it was 20 years later and I decided I would give this another try.  Since I was not working fulltime, anything I do would make more money than I currently made.  Understanding that fact I was able to pursue a dream I didn't let many people know about me.  I always wanted to be a teacher but they didn't make enough money to raise a family.  They did now that I only had my son and myself to support.  So that's what I did, I was able to get a teaching degree.  I took me about 2 more years but I did it.   

If God had not given me this disease, I would never have been able to experience the blessings I listed.  I also want to make sure everyone knows these are just a few of the blessings I've received.  There are many more that even I am not yet aware of.  Remember hindsight is 20/20 and I believe that.  We can never see the blessings immediately.  Normally we need a little time.    I guess the main point is that we truly grow through adversity.  By the way, I am now finishing my master’s degree because I want to teach high school math.  I should be able to finish in 2 years.  Talk about blessings?  My life will take a completely new turn when I graduate.  Just image all the blessings I will experience when I am able to return to work and become productive again.  I can't wait to see what God has in store for me.