by Mandi -Watch where the chalk-white arrows go. To the place where the sidewalk ends. S.S.
Member since:
January 24, 2006

QUESTION OF THE DAY(how did you know your "other" was the one?)

July 08, 2008 02:45 PM EDT
views: 130 | comments: 64

Today's guest questioneer is Carl W.  Carl is an author and new to our gather community. Here are some links for Carl:

http://www.WhyNeverMarried.com/


http://www.InsideTheWritersMindBlog.com

http://marriagetalk.gather.com


Purchase "So Why Have You Never Been Married" at
http://snipurl.com/28dg4

(I believe you can find his book on Amazon)

Feel free to visit and connect with him and tell him Mandi sent you!

 

QUESTION OF THE DAY:

How did you know your significant other was the "one?"

If you have not met that special someone, what are you looking for that will tell you they are the "one?"

 

 

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Comments: 64

Sarah (I want points) Jul 8, 2008, 2:47pm EDT
I don't know... I just knew I couldn't live without him.
Anne W. Jul 8, 2008, 2:48pm EDT
I'm looking for sparks!
Anne W. Jul 8, 2008, 2:48pm EDT
Thank you for posting to Point Whore! Wishing everyone many, many points!
Anne, sparks fizzle fast...trust me. ;-)

thanks Ladies!
♥Tabitha Cowan♥ Jul 8, 2008, 2:53pm EDT
I'm not quite sure I can pinpoint exactly when I knew, it's almost as if I knew as soon as I met him.
Laura C. Jul 8, 2008, 2:53pm EDT
I didn't. Sometimes I still don't. But he knew I was his "one" and that's enough for me.
John Doyle Jul 8, 2008, 2:57pm EDT
I have no idea. We met when we were 17 and stayed together and loved eachother for 53 years
Kathryn E. Jul 8, 2008, 2:58pm EDT
He and I both sneezed at the same time.
Anne W. Jul 8, 2008, 3:02pm EDT
smoke signals? Maybe this is why I'm still single... sigh...
Kimber L. Jul 8, 2008, 3:02pm EDT
He was my best friend for several years and one day I realized he was the only guy I wanted to spend time with. He was sweet and romantic and kind and when he finally asked me out it hit me that he was everything I had been complaining about NOT HAVING. He in fact was everything I had written down on my list of things I wanted in a boyfriend. EVEN DOWN TO the tiniest details. I think Looking back he may have been in my subconscious when I made the list and I may have based it on him not knowing it was him I wanted!! Everything feels so right too!! We compliment each other perfectly. Our friendship and respect for each other is deep and our passion and love is too!! We have fun together. Being a couple with him isn't work, it is fun!
Donald Hawley Jul 8, 2008, 3:06pm EDT
I relied entirely on God and He provided. That means more than anything else.
Laura C. Jul 8, 2008, 3:07pm EDT
i'm still single, but I'll know when I see how he is towards me when I need him most..when i've lost someone to death, i'm sick, or something good happens...how he reacts will show me what I need to know.
Rob Appell Jul 8, 2008, 3:07pm EDT
Being single and looking, I can't just meet someone and know they are the 'one'. I have to take time getting to know a person before I can determine whether I want to spend the rest of my life with them...in case the relationship is a mistake...like they were when I asked two gals to marry me in the past. Luckily, I found out what they really were like as time went on and ended things before it was too late.
CyberGwen ! Jul 8, 2008, 3:10pm EDT
You know, there were times that I thought that each new one was "the one". That is, until I got to know them a bit better.

I have finally met the real one and I know it because I still get butterflies three years later. For me, it feels like that honeymoon period that goes on in the beginning of a relationship has never ended.

Luckily, it was the same for him as well. Each day, we just get stronger, but it wasn't always easy.
thanks all!

Anne, smoke signals....hmmmm..perhaps if they are made by someone who looks really good in a loin cloth! LOL!
Ravichanthran P. Jul 8, 2008, 3:16pm EDT
I feel the union is a divine one! So I cannot explain who?
Anne W. Jul 8, 2008, 3:16pm EDT
I couldn't have said it better myself! That will be my new criteria for finding the "one"! Thanks for all your help Mandi!!!!
Dawn S. Jul 8, 2008, 3:17pm EDT
2 weeks after we met I just knew.
Anne, LOL!!! Just make sure under the loin cloth he is a good guy...wait that came out wrong!!!
Heather C. Jul 8, 2008, 3:21pm EDT
I knew he was the one when he was hit by a camaro that ran a stop sign while on his motorcycle. When I got the call, I drove so fast to the hospital I was at the accident scene in time to see them load him into the ambulance and see the demolished bike on the side of the road. He was on his way to help me. I had knew he was different from anyone I had ever dated and I felt a bond right away, but this was 6 months after we met and I knew there was no one else for me.
Anne W. Jul 8, 2008, 3:23pm EDT
Oh no, Mandi... that came out ALL RIGHT!!!
Wilma D. Jul 8, 2008, 3:25pm EDT
I was pretty sure for a coupleof years, but my longest ralationship til then was about two years, so I didn't really trust myself to pick the right guy. Then I got pregnant. I was worried, because my friends who had gone through it had gotten a lot of flack. My husband-to-be said, "Wow, a baby! That's fantastic!" That's when I knew.
Rfuaw D. Jul 8, 2008, 3:26pm EDT
Whenever we are apart my life is just not the same.
Katie R. Jul 8, 2008, 3:31pm EDT
Just something you feel ... You can't really explain it or put words to it ...
sheila ~the hapless housewife~ j. Jul 8, 2008, 3:39pm EDT
I just knew.
it happened....we just knew...........
Jennifer N. Jul 8, 2008, 4:08pm EDT
You just have that moment where you know.
that is a tough question to answer. Because though he is not perfect he is. Because even though he doesn't always say the right things, he always says "I love you". Because no matter how bad or how good I feel, he wants to hold me. Because when I look in his eyes, I see what he can't see, how much he loves me. And it amazes me that he does... that he can love me so much. I know that every time I see his face I thank God for allowing me this chance to have a true love. It's in his touch, in his voice, in his eyes, in his kiss. He truly had my heart and that make me so happy that it supercedes all other things.
Jean, just the teensiest bit odd, F. Jul 8, 2008, 4:14pm EDT
I "knew" when, after we'd just met and were dating, I would be outside doing yardwork or something and, for some unknown reason, I'd drop what I was doing and run into the house AND THEN the phone would start ringing... Of course it was him... I'd answer the phone (KNOWING it was him before he said a WORD) and he'd say "WHAT?!?!? What IS it? What do you want?" as though I'd called HIM first when I didn't!!! LOL!
Sharon P. Jul 8, 2008, 4:23pm EDT
Never been married, and only met one I came close with. He died from Agent Orange.
I just never met another.
Lynn R. Jul 8, 2008, 4:34pm EDT
We knew each other throughout high school. We dated each other's friends but never each other. THEN I went to a party at his house and we danced every dance not letting anyone else 'cut in'. Seven months later we were married, he was 19 and I was 18. He's adorable, my best friend, and I just knew he was the one. He still gives me butterflies when he walks in the room. AND we just celebrated our 35th anniversary. I think we did something right. :) I like him as much as I love him.
~*Jackie Ferrari*~ Jul 8, 2008, 4:37pm EDT
Wish I could help ya.

:-)
Marvel S. Jul 8, 2008, 4:43pm EDT
When I met the "One" I did not know it because I did not like him. I thought he was self absorbed but very cute. After a couple of years he asked me out and I gave him a chance. He touched my arm and I just knew. Corny but true. Now married for 12 years and I love him more today then I did when we first got married.
April M. Jul 8, 2008, 4:58pm EDT
I can't see an end in sight, and I can't find anything I don't like about him, we hardly fight and he's everything I wanted, even if I didn't know it at the time :)
Mary Ann S. Jul 8, 2008, 4:58pm EDT
I was just lucky. I fell in love with someone who si good to me and to the pets.
ELLEN B. Jul 8, 2008, 5:02pm EDT
I knew because he was all I thought about when we were apart. Sometimes just looking at him took my breath. And once, we I had a terrible toothache, he held me all nite long when I cried with pain. Got up the next day and called until he found a dentist who would take me in the new town we had moved to. He is passed away now, but I think of him often, and I will know that feeling again someday. That is what he would want. Ellen B
Rhetta A. Jul 8, 2008, 5:06pm EDT
It took a year of us both saying we couldn't possibly last. We loved being together, we really enjoyed each other's company, we made each other very happy, but I was a lot older than him and I couldn't have more children and we agreed he needed a younger woman and kids of his own. After a year, though, it became fairly obvious that we weren't going to leave each other. Nevertheless, it took a total of four years before we married. Now we've been together 12 years and married 8 years; he has grandkids instead of kids and he's not even 40 yet; and he's still the one and always wll be.
Kitty, you brought tears to my eyes...


ditto Lynn, Marvel, Ellen and Rhetta

thank you one and all!
Carl W. Jul 8, 2008, 5:28pm EDT
I think you know it's the right one because you don't only love them, you also like them. You know the stories: I fell in love with my best friend. Face it, love comes and goes and if your relationship is only based on love, good luck. But if you have friendship there to fall back on, then when the love wanes you're still hanging out with a friend.
Brittany H. Jul 8, 2008, 6:25pm EDT
we kept bumping into each other
Rocco R. Jul 8, 2008, 6:35pm EDT
It was love at first sight. We went to the same (small, liberal arts) college together. We kept bumping into each other. One day I got the nerve to ask her to go out on a date (Homecoming), and a week later I told her "I love you."
Ryan M. Jul 8, 2008, 6:47pm EDT
We just knew. Nothing in particular.
Well several reasons but a few stand out in my mind.

There was this really old guy who clearly had senility issues. Kevin picked him up on the highway not once, but twice and took him home. Kevin did not know this guy.

There was this girl who went to our church who had serious hygiene issues. Most of the guys made fun of her. Kevin was polite to her and treated her just like any of the other girls in the church.

Kevin didn't know my mother from Adam. Yet, when she broke her leg he went to her house daily making sure she was okay. He helped her set up her house (she'd been moving) and all sorts of stuff. He just did it because it was the right thing to do.

Don't fall in love just because of how they treat you. The true measure of a person is how they treat those who are most often mistreated.
I should note on the thing with my mom - I was away at college at the time.
Shelley, now that IS a keeper!!!!!!!!!!!

thanks all!
Lilith Dorsey Jul 8, 2008, 7:57pm EDT
Could have been the closet full of kilts... the bottle of single malt... the 3 hour hand massage....
Miz Lynn aka/BooBoo Jul 8, 2008, 8:14pm EDT
I realized I loved my lil cajun standing on a mountaintop at Inspiration Point. He was open, honest and wore his heart on his sleeve...still is.
Jan S. Jul 8, 2008, 9:15pm EDT
My husband and I "recognized" each other at our first meeting. It was more of a reunion than meeting for the first time. It was impossible to ignore, even if we'd wanted to. It would have been like trying to ignore an avalance. We are soul mates.
We were like two halves, finally joined.
Vicky P. Jul 8, 2008, 9:39pm EDT
It was love at first sight.
Debbie B. Jul 8, 2008, 11:45pm EDT
We couldn't stand each other at first (he thought I had ruined his "big plans" and I thought he was a big jerk). But he kept coming back, more likeable each time. We became great friends, and he made me laugh (something that had been lacking in my first marriage). Then we became great lovers. We're now married, still great friends, still laughing, and still great lovers.
Sorry to get on so late. Don't have much time for the computer during the day. Thanks for the email.
Heidianna "Coriander" T. Jul 9, 2008, 3:38am EDT
I admit to being a romantic optimistic soul, but I had pretty much decided that I was destined to be alone for my life. And then in hopped Scott, quite literally. The first moment I saw him, I knew he was a kindred spirit. With him, I have always felt at home. Comfortable, happy, and in tune. That was it for me!
Jaime R. Jul 9, 2008, 9:20am EDT
It was a lot of things but I had never been in love before & when I realised that I was in love with him - that gave me a pretty good idea!
Susan K. Jul 9, 2008, 9:21am EDT
GREAT question!

Let's see ... the balance in his savings account? (lol)

No, honestly now, he was and still is the best friend I ever had and I trust him with everything.
Bebe S. Jul 9, 2008, 9:33am EDT
The sex! LOL

Actually I just realized that I didn't want to live my life without him in it. We get along great and have a blast together. We are complete opposites but agree on the important things.

Thanks for asking the question and helping me remind myself of why I love him so!
Sharon B. Jul 9, 2008, 3:11pm EDT
I thought I knew, but I guess I was wrong. Now I live with my mistakes.
Chas Andrews Jul 9, 2008, 3:55pm EDT
I met the one person I truly loved and she's with someone else. I've never met anyone like her and probably never will.
Douglas Eden Jul 10, 2008, 5:26am EDT
I had her and then lost her.

My current " love " ( ahem, cough cough ) was NEVER the right one, but issues of convenience, fear and stupidity lead me to marry her anyway.

WHEN I find the REAL soulmate, it will be overwhelmingly clear that her best interests and benefits will be more important to me than my own. ( second, though, to my son's ) and hopefully my needs and such will be formost in her heart.
Philip B. Jul 10, 2008, 7:46am EDT
Mandi,

After all these years the loss is still felt!
Beth G. Jul 13, 2008, 10:01pm EDT
He was there for me in a way that very few people, if any, have been there. That's how I knew. Great question!
Gretchen Lee Bourquin Dec 7, 2008, 1:40pm EST
You see my right shoe is perfectly symmetrical to my left shoe. It's really cool. It keeps me balanced and warm. Or did you mean a person? If I ever find him, I would hope he would do the same thing. Keep me warm and balanced, and more. There's a lot of great stories here. It warms the heart.

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