Food Writing Sample

The Care and Feeding of your Latin Lover

First Let me warn you girls, you are competing against his MOTHER!  You always want her special recipes to win! With so many cross-cultural marriages I've written this guide with the Gringa in mind, and I'm going to assume that she has never prepared a traditional meal!

Mexico

I had the occasion to live in what was then a small picturesque pueblo, Santa Rosa Jauregi, Qto.

As with the rest of the world the population there has exploded and cobble stone streets have been replaced with paved roads ...  Unthinkable! But the Carnitas are still made in the traditional way! It's hard to halt tradition.  Santa Rosa's claim to fame is still the succulent CARNITAS sold in the Mercado on Sunday mornings. Literal translation, little bits of pork.

You will need a large crock pot or thick pot that can be simmered on top of the stove.

A sharp pointed paring knife.

A turkey baster

                                                      The ingredients are

Preferably the Butt Portion of a Pork Roast but a cheaper cut will do just as well... It can weigh from four to eight pounds depending on size of cooking vessel and how many people you're planning on serving. Four pounds is good for two meals for two people.  Leftovers freeze well.

Several Cloves of Garlic

One orange

Kosher salt (plain salt can be substituted)

A few sprigs of Cilantro

Two Bay Leaves (optional)

Begin by rubbing the roast with an ample amount of salt. Peel the garlic cloves and slice the "toes" into thin strips.

Insert the tip of the paring knife into the folds of the pork or hollow out small channels where you will be inserting the garlic spears.

Place roast into crock pot, set the heat setting on High and forget about it for an hour.

This will be an excellent time to study your Spanish Verbs. You know you can tell your man that you love him a hundred different ways in Spanish and never repeat yourself!

Amore (Ah more ey) .  = LOVER                   Accent always on next to the last syllable

Carino (Car reen yo)    = DEAR ONE

Osito (Oh see toe)      = LITTLE BEAR

The roast should now have begun to make it's own juice. Cut the orange in half and squeeze the juice over the top of the pork. Wash thoroughly and cut into half inch pieces the sprigs of Cilantro. Sprinkle them over the top of the Pork. Cover and allow it to cook for another hour.

Take this time to listen to a CD of the Romantic Trios of Mexico such as Tres Aces, Trio Los Panchos, Tecolinos. Knowing the words to old standards such as, Ceilito Lindo, will leave a lasting impressiom upon your Latin Lover.  More lasting if you can carry a tune! 

Ese Lunar que tienes junto a la Boca... that little birth mark you have next to your mouth

No se lo des a nadie ... don't give it to anyone

Cielito Lindo que a mi me toca ... Pretty Sky it belongs to me ...

(Kinda' loses something in translation!)

It's time to baste the roast with the turkey baster. Do this about every half hour. To keep it covered in as much liquid as you can is the idea! Flip it over if you chose... It's advisable to start with the fatty side down.

It's time to make the GREEN SALSA that you'll serve with the Carnitas. For the Salsa you will need;

A blender

A Comal

A Small Saucepan

Half pound of Tomatillos ....  funny looking green tomatoes covered with dry brown leaves

Four or five Jalapeno Peppers

Teaspoon of salt 

Two medium Onions chopped very fine

Handful of Cilantro chopped fine

Three or four cloves of garlic  

Quartered Limes.

Do you know what a COMAL is? A pancake grill silly! Leaving the stems on the Jalapenos heat the COMAL . Place peppers on grill and turn them frequently holding them by their stems! You want them to be blackened ... charred. Meanwhile, remove "leaves" from the Tomatillos and with your paring knife remove top part of core. Place them in Sauce Pan, along with the whole garlic cloves, cover with water and bring to a boil. A pinch of salt can't hurt! Lower heat and test to see if the Tomatillos  have softened.  

 Remove Garlic Cloves and with a small amount of water from the pan LIQUIFY the Garlic. Next remove the stems from the peppers and add them to the garlic in the blender. Hit the surge button until they've dissipated but not DISOLVED. Add the salt and the Tomatillos and hit surge again several times.  You should now have a thick liquid. Remove and place in attractive serving dish. A clay bowl is a nice touch. Stir in by hand HALF of the chopped Onion and HALF of the chopped Cilantro. You're done. 

Caution;

Do not rub your eyes or any other sensitive body parts after handling the Jalapenos. 

If you get careless the best thing to do is put a piece of white bread in your eye to take away the sting.

The roast is done when it's tender and falls apart. Let it stand for half an hour...heat off. Remove from liquid and you're ready to serve. Break meat into small pieces.

You serve the Carnitas with hot Corn Tortillas, heated on the Comal. On a very hot grill place two Tortillas.  When you see that the middles are  puffing up. Turn them over! Heat thoroughly.  Remove them and place them in a clean terry towel covering them immediately. Repeat this process.  You can Nuke them in the Microwave for a minute without unwrapping the towel just before serving!

Slip in the Trio Los Pancho's CD. Sing along if you dare. Scoop the Carnitas into the Tortillas or serve on the side.  Your Latin Lover will instinctively squeeze Lime juice on his "little bits of pork" followed by Salsa!  On the table have small bowls with remaining chopped Onion, chopped Cilantro, along with the quartered Limes, for additional garnish. 

Depending on the Jalapenos, the Salsa may bring tears to your Latin Lovers eyes. They just might  be Tears of JOY.  

Till next time ... Luis Miguel and Mexican Cocido   

.