Peeing in the Adult Pool

I'm not one to spread rumors or anything - no, not me.  Just because someone chooses to relieve themselves where others are paddling around on Styrofoam noodles does not mean I need to gossip about it.  Sometimes when you gotta go, you gotta go.  Where I do draw the line is when one I am lassoed up in the confessional.

Listen, just because you pee in the pool, don't go around spreading sass that I do as well.  I tend to consider the fact that the general pool going public might not want to swim in my urine.  Although I admit that I may be mistaken in that conclusion, I would prefer remaining in ignorance if that is the case. 

Just because it is the Westside pool party (an upscale gym in Kansas City) and there are more strippers present than say an average pool party at the Playboy Mansion (according to somebody who has been to the Playboy Mansion) that does not give anyone the excuse to lose all bodily control.  Yes, I know that the pool parties have grown from back in the day when I used to sit poolside reading a batch of trash mags; but times change and sometimes not for the best.  Of course, I was surprised to learn that the place had been overrun with local strippers.  I also confess that I didn't believe they had invaded the parties until I witnessed their hooker heels and bodies that were so thin that you could see the side views of their artificial boobs if their back was toward you.

I know that once the bar opens it is hard to not keep on drinking...and drinking...and drinking.  Yes, I too have been so drunk that I didn't know right from left, yet I always managed to make it to the restroom regardless.  Granted, there have been times when during a laughing fit or asthma attack I didn't quite have the lower abdominal capabilities I wish I had, but only a few drops escaped...so, don't even bring it up.

I'm glad that you finally owned up that you were the peeing marvel.  I'm sure it was hard when surrounded by friends who were shocked, YES SHOCKED, that people would swim in the adult pool and pee in it as well.  Of course, we all knew that swimming in pee was the fate for all who ventured in the large pool (the only place you could swim laps) because where there are children and a swimming pool it just factors in that there also has to be pee, BUT THE ADULT POOL! 

I agree, it would have been helpful if the adult pool had a restroom that was conveniently located, but it doesn't and I, nor probably anyone else currently tanning by the pool, designed it yet we are rewarded with the joy of swimming in the contents of your now empty bladder.

Yes, you do deserve some snaps for pointing out that the same people who are surprised to be swimming in pool piss are the same ones who freely urinate in the great outdoors.  Lakes, rivers, oceans, it makes little difference.  The problem that you have in arguing your case though is that in lakes, rivers, and oceans everything is swimming and peeing in the water so why not join the fun?  Back to nature sort of speak.

Of course the same cannot be said for pool peeing primarily because there is so much of it that apparently the filters (according to sources who would know) can no longer filter it out thus that stinging feeling one may get when they open their eyes in the Westside Pool might not be only from the chlorine.  All one can do is to make sure not to drink the water and if you do realize that yes, it does taste like piss...the person to blame is the one who is looking back at you in the mirror.

© 2007 Westerfield