by Carol P.
Member since:
April 26, 2007

Responsibility or Not - Republished

July 17, 2007 11:42 AM EDT (Updated: August 08, 2007 04:55 PM EDT)
views: 79 | comments: 28

Responsibility:

I have a responsibility to those I love...
to be loving, patient, considerate, and kind;
to be loyal, respectful, and honest;
to be appreciative, encouraging, and comforting
to share myself and care for myself
To be the best possible "Me".

BUT

I am not responsible for them...
not for their achievements, successes, or triumphs;
Not for their joy, gratification, or fulfillment;
not for their defeats, failures, or disappointments;
not for their thoughts, choices, or mistakes.
And definitely not for their suicide.

For had I been responsible, my son's death would not have happened.
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Comments: 28

Janet "Jax" B. Jul 17, 2007, 11:43am EDT
So true! If someone is going to do it...there isn't really much one can do...

(Been there)
interesting.
Carol P. Jul 17, 2007, 12:14pm EDT
Unfortunately, that is correct..we cannot make anyone do anything.
Cynthia W. Jul 17, 2007, 12:22pm EDT
Really good poem and I think it really applies to all types of death not just suicide. I think survivor's guilt is common many times when someone loses someone they love and I know it is important to remember that we do not have control over these things. Thanks for sharing!
Jared G. Jul 17, 2007, 2:05pm EDT
Thank you so much for sharing. I will feature this at "For the Sake of Peace."
PEACE!
Carol P. Jul 17, 2007, 3:51pm EDT
I agree Cynthia.

Thanks Jared!
Connie C. Jul 17, 2007, 5:26pm EDT
That is the truth for sure.
Judith W. Jul 17, 2007, 8:41pm EDT
That is so true and it's an important distinction. I will keep a copy of this in my book of quotes that I admire and love. Thank you.
Carol P. Jul 17, 2007, 8:49pm EDT
You are all very welcome.
Trudy P. Jul 18, 2007, 3:50pm EDT
That is true, but it is so easy to put the blame on yourself, "if I had only....."
Carol P. Jul 18, 2007, 4:03pm EDT
I know Trudy. I know.
Elsie Duggan Jul 19, 2007, 1:40am EDT
I am glad when I got to the end, that you hadn't written it, but thanks for putting it up there, says a lot and means so much to many.
Carol P. Jul 19, 2007, 11:37am EDT
Elsie, I could have written this, I have said these words over and over so many times since I lost my son to suicide. Yes, these words have helped me and others as well.
Susan W. Jul 19, 2007, 10:27pm EDT
I agree with everyone above. If only you could make someone else pay attention to what you say. As a nurse I feel it every day. If only...If only you would stop drinking, stop taking drugs, stop beating your wife (or leave your abusive spouse), stop stop stop. Find something good and positive to do with your life.
But you can't make anyone do anything, you can only give advice. And people choose to take it or leave it. You can't force them to do anything.
I have a dream world, where everyone gets up in the morning, steps out on the front porch to watch the sun come up, and vows to spend the day doing good.
It's not reality, but I choose to continue hoping for the best every day.
Carol P. Jul 20, 2007, 3:05pm EDT
After all, without hope, what do we have?
Carol Lloyd Jul 21, 2007, 3:34am EDT
nice post ty :)
James C. Jul 22, 2007, 6:11pm EDT
Carolion,

Excellent thoughts!
pamela r. Jul 23, 2007, 12:32pm EDT
Excellent post--and so very very true. I'm saving this one for some people i love.
Kathy D. Jul 23, 2007, 10:46pm EDT
This is excellent
Carol P. Jul 24, 2007, 9:09am EDT
Thank you all.
Pina M. Aug 16, 2007, 6:57pm EDT
Oh my God. Carol, this is so moving, so profound and so true.

I am so sorry.
Carol P. Aug 17, 2007, 12:04pm EDT
Thank you Pina.
June b. Sep 26, 2007, 2:14pm EDT
Saying it and doing it are two different things
Helen D. Aug 15, 2008, 9:12am EDT
Wonderful. My husband's mother still holds me responsible for his accident. Thank you for reminding me that I was not responsible for his choices.
Carol P. Aug 15, 2008, 10:39am EDT
June, Are you referring to saying you are going to complete suicide? You are right, but when they start talking, you better start listening.
Carol P. Aug 15, 2008, 10:40am EDT
Helen, You are NOT responsible. Print this one out and put it on your frig! :) Hugs to you my friend.

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