by Peter Joseph Swanson
Member since:
April 13, 2007

What are you going to do this Great Depression for laughs ???

October 01, 2008 04:50 PM EDT
views: 122 | comments: 53

Or are you just going to be a droopy drawers over your hobo beans eaten right out of the can, warmed up on a burning phone book.  You could go to Hollywood and try and be a star.  Or you could just read about it.  That's what my incredibly cheap paperback novel Hollywood Sinners is about.  Or if you don't like to read about inept Italian pimps, a lesbian madam, nylon hose, a fake horse at the bottom of the screenwriter's swimming pool, a cactus juice party, kidnapping a Nazi, meeting Francis Farmer, a Catholic wedding, a cheap Republic Studios western, casting couch quickies, a Bible salesman hotel quickie, the story of Sodom and Gomorrah, and a mysterious nun who is only seen on the streetcars, well, you could just watch Annie again.

 

 

Order it today -
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Comments: 53

Quinn (aka Entwife) Blackburn Oct 1, 2008, 4:51pm EDT
I was going to jump from the top floor... but this depression is just too great to miss!
Bebe S. Oct 1, 2008, 4:51pm EDT
I LOVE Italian pimps... They really dress the best!
Quinn (aka Entwife) Blackburn Oct 1, 2008, 4:51pm EDT
Think I'll start my own shanty town instead.
..
U wishing you laughter
Kimberly Ripley Oct 1, 2008, 4:51pm EDT
I wouldn't care if I EVER sat through Annie again! I saw that so many times when my older kids were small I could scream!
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 4:53pm EDT
You can bring it with you to shantytown and read aloud after the sing along -

" ... Brother can you spare a dime ... "
♠~Dnbuster~♠ ~. Oct 1, 2008, 4:57pm EDT
ha:)
thanks 4 sharing
Monica H. Oct 1, 2008, 4:57pm EDT
We have Annie on DVD and I want to destroy it now with a bomb. It's a great musical, but I don't think it's meant to be seen by the human eye 400 times.
Wanda H. Oct 1, 2008, 4:58pm EDT
I am looking for my hobo bean recipe. Will be NOT watching Annie ever again.
Phyllis R. Oct 1, 2008, 5:00pm EDT
Annie who???????
Phyllis R. Oct 1, 2008, 5:01pm EDT
During this Great Depression I will have to read "Hollywood Sinners" AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!! :O)
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 5:06pm EDT
Hollywood Sinners can be read again and again. For sure. It's the one book to take with you when you hop the train (to ride free on the top).
Tracy Fabre Oct 1, 2008, 5:07pm EDT
No Annie here... already read Hollywood Sinners... not keen on beans as a stand-alone meal... can you post a Hobo Bean Recipe? Make it *exciting*?
Heidianna "Coriander" T. Oct 1, 2008, 5:08pm EDT
Annie!!!!

Oh wait, that's probably not the choice you were aiming for. ;) Heehee.

The sun will come out tomorrow!
Curt L. Oct 1, 2008, 5:15pm EDT
When I'm stuck with a day that's grey and dreary, I just stick up my chin and grin and say;
"Hollywood Sinners!".
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 5:16pm EDT
I adore Carol Burnett so there is no wrong answer. I just wish the story was all about Carol Burnett and the little girls only got about ten minutes, max. And more Tim Curry, too !!!
kelldogg ! Oct 1, 2008, 5:17pm EDT
hysterical! i'm thinking about becoming a lesbian madam personally!!!
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 5:17pm EDT
Yay Hollywood Sinners !!!!

(sing it out)
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 5:18pm EDT
There's nothing like a lesbian madam during a Great Depression !!!
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 5:19pm EDT
MY lesbian madam has a samovar !!!!
kara t Oct 1, 2008, 5:28pm EDT
Lesbian Madam sounds like fun, and I already have some experience in that field, but I'm really considering for THIS Great Depression, buying up all those cheap forclosures and becoming a Slum Lord. I haven't tried Slum Lord yet, and I hear it's almost as exciting.
Dorothy H. Oct 1, 2008, 5:52pm EDT
I'm gonna be hunting, trapping and fishing out here on the ranch, for this great depression.

I wonder how long it will take them to start rationing?

I could still watch Annie!
Amanda C. Oct 1, 2008, 6:04pm EDT
I'm going out to Californie to dig for gold. Wait, is gold worth anything anymore? I don't remember...
Sy g. Oct 1, 2008, 6:21pm EDT
Peter, you are a marketing genius.

Long live Hollywood Sinners. In fact I raise my glass to sinners everywhere, and I say "screw the Depression, read!!!"
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 6:22pm EDT
hee hee

" ... Pennies From Heaven ... "
I'm going to go back to playing music in the street.
Robin"Buffy's Stunt Double" D. Oct 1, 2008, 6:37pm EDT
Think I'll just send the kids out to beg for odd jobs or else read Hollywood sinners, while eating beans from a can
Kate M. Oct 1, 2008, 6:46pm EDT
I'm going to hide my legs in baggy pants and sit on a flat cart and beg for quarters for the homeless, legless old hag for this depression.
Peter,

YOU . . . are a MESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
ROFL!
Tee hee heeeeeee.
Why are they all looking at US???
They look at though . . .as though . . .as though . . .they want . . .to . . .get us!!!
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 6:55pm EDT
HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAA
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 1, 2008, 6:56pm EDT
they want my beans
donna h. Oct 1, 2008, 7:23pm EDT
Peter you are a hoot!
Karen G. Oct 1, 2008, 9:21pm EDT
They're coming to take you away ha,ha ho,ho hey,hey.
Beth G. Oct 1, 2008, 9:29pm EDT
Why not create a Swansonville Peter;-)
~Lady Neeetah of California~Obama #44 W. Oct 1, 2008, 10:24pm EDT
Excellent idea. Do it, Peter. Create your own town. Any questions, see Wanda H.
www.aries18.gather.com and her maunaville!

Those people look homeless, Man, and they need a city of their OWN!

I do NOT want them in my city!!!!
Heather ~of the Whippets~ M. Oct 1, 2008, 10:52pm EDT
Are there pool boys in Swansonville? Can't let this Depression thing get too depressing....
Kay & Snowy Cat Oct 2, 2008, 9:48am EDT
OMG! Leave it to Peter to take lemons and make Hollywood Sinner lemonade!
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 2, 2008, 9:52am EDT
I'll drink it with you - it's in the bathtub sloshing around with the bathtub gin !!!

(Now - if we can just get Auntie Mame out of it)
Zahid Perwez Oct 2, 2008, 2:58pm EDT
Selling apple on the Bay Street (Toronto)........
Marge H. Oct 3, 2008, 5:49pm EDT
I'll definitely be reading "Hollywood Sinners" as soon as it gets here because reading Peter Joseph Swanson's novels will make me a better person and I so want to be a better person even if I'm homeless.
*Carol ~Bronx Southern Belle D. Oct 4, 2008, 5:26pm EDT
You goofy guy. You should know what I'm planning on doing is picking lice from the people's hair as they come to tour my palace where you used to live.
*Carol ~Bronx Southern Belle D. Oct 4, 2008, 5:26pm EDT
By the way, I'm buying your book, too. I think you're awesome.
*Carol ~Bronx Southern Belle D. Oct 4, 2008, 5:27pm EDT
Will you autograph it for me?
*Carol ~Bronx Southern Belle D. Oct 4, 2008, 5:27pm EDT
Okay, I'm done! Stick a fork in me.
Bounder .. Oct 4, 2008, 5:51pm EDT
Well the novel would make a nice replacement for the phone book. Gee, that would almost qualify for a book burning?
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 4, 2008, 8:11pm EDT
Don't burn my book !!! Burn the phone book !!! My book can be passed on as a Christmas present !!!
Peter Joseph Swanson Oct 4, 2008, 8:12pm EDT
Give somebody a phone book for Christmas and see what kind of a look you get !!!
William Dotani Oct 5, 2008, 7:54am EDT
I will burn junk mail in my fireplace to stay warm.
Jeana B. Oct 22, 2008, 8:16am EDT
I was thinking of starting a nudist casino in Atlantic City with part of the beach closed off so I can charge for streaking. There's gonna be money there. I'll be rich. RICH I TELL YA!
Francesca V. Dec 9, 2008, 1:11pm EST
I was thinking I'd ride it out and not be an alarmist.

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