by Selene N.
Member since:
July 26, 2006

No, I am Not Ready to See My Baby Yet

November 29, 2006 04:15 PM EST
views: 26 | comments: 12

These days, people keep asking me, "Are you ready for the new baby?" And other pregnant women would say, "I can't wait to unload this!" But, no, I don't feel that way. I can't believe it has been 8 months. I wish my baby would stay inside for another few more months.

I think one major reason that I am resenting her coming is because this is my first baby, and I am a little (or very much) freaked out about it. I just don't think I am ready. Another reason is that my husband has just recently come home from a deployment, and he just hasn't been part of it. How can my pregnancy be over before he even gets a chance to participate?

But I know it is irrelevant what I wish for. She will come whenever nature decides.

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Comments: 12

Cindy Green (Romance Author) Nov 29, 2006, 4:24pm EST
I know what you mean. When I was pregnant with the first one I enjoyed it. I felt a loss when I was no longer pregnant. With the second though, I just wanted him out!!
Wendy F. Nov 29, 2006, 4:38pm EST
Selena , it sound like you might be experiencing some post-partum depression , even before the baby comes. I would let your doctor know about this .Sometimes we need help to get us through our conflicting emotions during our pregnancies and after. It happens a lot and it is OKAY to speak with a therapist if you need to.
Selene N. Nov 29, 2006, 4:41pm EST
Wendy, thanks for your concern.... I didn't think it's that serious. I mean, I don't think I am really depressed.... I hope not! But I have an appointment coming, and I will definitely talk to my doctor about it. Thanks.
Mary H. Nov 29, 2006, 4:47pm EST
You are right now to rush it. She will be born soon enough and that carries challenges all its own. Enjoy your pregnancy; you will miss it once she's born. I know I did!
♯ ♪ Nov 29, 2006, 6:18pm EST
As soon as you see your baby's sweet little face, you'll wonder why you thought this way! Trust me, you will do fine.
Susan *. Nov 29, 2006, 6:55pm EST
I was nervous about my son coming too...and wasn't sure I was ready to be a mom although I was much older than most first time moms. I think it's natural to be a little resentful of the baby changing your life. Mom's lives DO change...dad's not quite as much but Mom's are never really the same after having a child. Does that make sense to you?
Jody Says Nov 29, 2006, 7:32pm EST
I felt compelled to offer a male view, as our lives change immensely also. I was so afraid when our first was due, and filled with dread, it was the most profound event in my life and I wanted it over, but I was also dreading the day at the same time. I did feel helpless as she grew, ached, and suffered morning sickness, other than try and offer comfort I did sometimes feel left out. But all of my fears and angst were laid to rest the moment I laid eyes on my child, and it was like the last nine months did not exist- my life started that day and it continues to amaze me each day. It will get better trust me- we are pros now with two wonder children.
Jody Says Nov 29, 2006, 7:34pm EST
make that "wonderfull" sorry I think faster than I type
Teara, Mrs. PSofG, P. Nov 29, 2006, 9:09pm EST
I think those types of feelings are completely normal, and are really nothing to worry too much about. In my opinion no matter how much you prepare for a baby you are never "ready" for everything that comes along with it, whether it be your first or 5th child. Each one is new and brings new challenges. Inspite of all the changes, good and bad, you won't be able to imagine life without them once they arrive though. Just try to relax and get as much sleep as possible now while you still can!
Selene N. Nov 29, 2006, 9:37pm EST
Nicole - She's due on 12/31.

Susan - Yes, it makes total sense. I know my life will never be the same.... I just don't know how different!

Jody - Thank you so much for sharing! You sound really tender and loving. Your wife is so lucky. I wish my husband could have been around. I am sure he would have pampered me if he could.

Thanks everyone!
Suzi :Two sides to every story Dec 3, 2006, 3:25pm EST
My husband, a care provider, suggests you discuss your feelings in detail with your obstetrician, and that you should take your husband along with you.
capeach -. Dec 6, 2006, 3:04am EST
I felt very much like this before I gave birth (and even up to in the delivery room I didn't feel totally ready for my daughter's debut). I kept feeling like I needed more time and that I wasn't ready for it. Thank goodness for feeling like a fat cow so you're happy to finally give birth just to have the baby out!

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