Why do so few people RSVP to house parties in advance? (And what can you do about it?)

OK. You've set up your party for a cause or candidate, you've emailed invitations, you're excited and starting to make plans and then... nothing. No RSVPs, or only a few. Even your best friends don't answer your email.

What do you do? Cancel the party? NO! House party hosts across the country consistently tell us that the vast majority of RSVPs arrive in the last 48 hours. Why? We can't answer that completely, although Miss Manners might say that RSVPing has gone out of fashion -- especially since the trend seems to be the same regardless of age, region, or type of event. From observation, the Party2Win community has realized that:

Some people decide to RSVP after they talk to their partner or check their schedule, and then forget.

Others are so overwhelmed by the number of emails they get, that they just don't read them all.

Some people may not want to hurt your feelings by saying no, so they put off responding

And, still others assume that you know they will be there.

[More ideas about why RSVPs arrive so late? Add to the comments!]

Of course, none of these explanations help you plan your party. Are you planning for 6 or 20? I have personally hosted house parties that ranged from 5 attendees all the way up to 160! And, in virtually every case, I didn't have a good sense of how many people would be there until the last days. (In fact, the RSVP issue can catch you by surprise when you think you have a good turnout -- my 160-person backyard party only had 50 RSVPs 48 hours before the event. Fortunately, most people RSVPed last minute, but we still ended up with more people than expected and.)

Then, of course, there is the equally frustrating problem of people who RSVP "Yes", but then don't show up. Some call that day and others (most often people who signed up online and don't know you well) simply don't show.

HERE ARE SOME OF THE WAYS PARTY2WIN HOSTS REPORT DEALING WITH THESE PROBLEMS:

Ways to increase RSVPs

1) Announce, invite, remind, send directions. Repetition really helps -- especially with those folks who meant to answer but didn't get around to it. Plan to start with a save the date email, follow up with an invitation, send a reminder with more party details about a week before your event, and then send directions to all "Yes" "Maybe" and "No Response" invitees the day before the party or event.

2) How many people would you like at your party? You need to quadruple that number when you send invitations. Quadruple? Yes. Parties for causes, candidates, and charities have a lower response rate than personal parties for birthdays or weddings. That means you need to invite more people. Don't worry about ending up with too many people -- programs such as Party2Win allow you to put a maximum number of attendees. (And be sure to increase the maximum to allow for the no-shows.)

3) Consider making your party public. If you are hosting for a group and they give you the option to post your party on their website, do it. I always make my parties public and I've met some fascinating people as a result. (And, most programs hide your email so you won't be hit with spam.) You can also consider a "semi-private" party, where your event is listed but people need to request an invitation.

4) Ask your friends to invite their friends. If you'd like to have a big party, enlist your friends to help! Give them an email invitation and a flyer they can pass along to their friends. And, be sure to encourage everyone who RSVPs "Yes" or "Maybe" to invite friends to come along.

5) Pick up the phone. I love email, but some people don't. Pick up the phone and call friends who you would really like to attend. You're more likely to get an RSVP, it's more likely to be "Yes", and they are more likely to show up. (A mix of calls, emails, and flyers is best.)

How to plan when you don't know how many people are coming

Here's a sampling of ideas from Party2Win members:

Plan a potluck. The more people who come, the more food you'll have. Don't worry about assigning types of food -- it almost always works out ok. Just be sure that you (or a close friend) provide one appetizer and one main dish. (And, remember: potato chips count as an appetizer!)

Think about a dessert party. People LOVE desserts, and the same principle applies... the more people who come, the more food you'll have.

Stick to chips and dip. People come to house parties to meet people who share their interests... not for the food.

Use paper plates and plastic forks. Or, if you strongly prefer to use regular plates and silverware, start by putting half the number you think you'll need out. Then, bring more out as people arrive. It's always better to look as if extra people have turned up! (You can also have plastic ware as a backup.)

Share your ideas and experiences in the comments or join the group and post an article! Have you had a party where too many people showed up? Too few? Do people tell you they didn't get the email even though you know you sent it? Any good ideas for increasing attendance or getting a good head count earlier?