This is just sick !

rated 10, worthy of comment.
i have some misgivings about this article. those are "pro-life" writers. i don't know if there is something that has been misinterpreted.

our society is viewing the burden of the underperforming in a negative light. that's evident by the way people treat me and i would think that would be evident by others on this list, who have aspergers.

do i feel respected and happy. no, i don't. should i have been born? that was never a question put to me before. i have contributed to many people in my life and if i wasn't there, my influence on their lives wouldn't be there either. i think i have made positive contributions to others.

but this hasn't been an easy life. it's not one i would recommend to others.

aspergers strongly runs in my family. it's heartbreaking from one view. and it's surprising that we have made the strides that we have made, collectively.

Hi Wendy, thankyou for bringing this to my attention.

I had a read of the article and I think you'll find the British researchers referred to there were talking 'pre-implantation' technology. (not that the commentator wanted to focus on that, being more concerned with drawing outrageous conclusions. i share troublemkr's misgivings about the article's bias.)

This technology is used to help families pre-select at the in-vitro stage to avoid genetic abnormalities that affect only one gender (for example), or to ensure certain characteristics to help with future transplant opportunities for existing children.. ick, yeah i know it's all a bit queezy-making, but what I'm saying is I personally can draw a distinction between pre-implantation selection when the embryo is still a cluster of cells in a petri dish, and the aborting of a healthy foetus from a uterus.

My seven year old son has Down Syndrome and Autism. At 21 weeks gestation we learned of his DS and whereas it was overtly legally and medically not an option to terminate at that stage (because there were no aspects to his health that were incompatible with life) there was enough winking and nudging going on for me to realise that had I wanted to, they could have fudged the paperwork to make me suddenly appear to be at 19 weeks gestation. Now, what if at that point they could have told me he'd be autistic as well? If they could have told me I'd never have another decent night's sleep for the rest of my life? That he'd never share the potential of most people with Down Syndrome? Well, I just the hell don't know. Same as I don't know what I would have done if they had been able to tell me before twelve weeks gestation or before i got drunk enough to have sex with his father. None of us knows what we'd do in a set of circumstances until we are in them; what social imperatives may influence our decisions, what different pressures can do to what we thought our ethics were. Which is why I'm a pro-choice gal. (Even though I may not agree with the 'lifestyle' reasons people may have for their choices and even though I bitterly resent the soul-crushing burden placed on women to have to make these choices following ante-natal testing.) For me though, there was no decision to make. I'd carried the lad for five months, he was a kicking, nauseating reality and nobody was getting their dirty hands on him till he was ready to come out.

Thankyou for your perspective troublemkr. I am sure you have made positive contributions to those around you, despite the challenges you face, or perhaps even because of them. Your question 'should i have been born?' is one i consider often now that i live in the world of special children. I see these kids (most far more disabled than my little bloke) their families, the daily struggles, and despite all the hardships they face, i still can't find any possible way that i could justify making that decision on anybody's behalf.

ps.. and whereas i don't sleep much, i do get compensated with some world class cuddles ;)

I have to say I have nothing but respect for Chuck Colson and I don't think he is misconstruing the facts or going off on a tangent at all . He is a firm believer in the sanctity of life.

well, wendy, i find the "pro-life" stance just a little hypocritical.

the fact is that i was born. while i didn't receive any special education stuff in school, it was more because they had no idea about aspergers then.

however, it's been a big battle for me as a grownup. part of it is that the resources aren't there for adults. (why not? we grew up.) and part of it is that people do discriminate against others who are different. i don't feel so dang different. i am a people too. but society doesn't judge a bully but judges the victim of that bullying. i don't ask whether some of the people who get downright nasty are "pro-life" but i have to assume that some of them could well be, given the % that say they are in surveys.

i have a fairly thick skin and i am making my way, so i'm not complaining. just making an observation.

i was talking to my counselor (she refers me to other resources, so it's required i see the counselor), she said "you know when someone asks how are you and you ask how they are and nobody cares?" i was horrified. i'd always answered the question. what do you mean nobody cares? when i ask how are you, i care. you mean people aren't telling me the truth? what do you say "fine" and just lie? how do i know if someone asks me how are you and they want to know? it was the end of the hour and i never did get an answer to these questions.

i flunked social conversation 101.

Right on Lisa , well said . Oh troublemkr s. , I don't appreciate being called hyprocitical .I have a daughter with Asperger's Syndrome .We have had many many struggles , our life has been difficult and her's more so . About the "how are you " and no body really wants to know - people say that to each other all the time. It seems to be another form of "Hello " . Sometimes if they slow down long enough, I ask " do you really want to know ? " Sadly most don't , but I have friends that do .

wendy, i didn't call you hypocritical.

i'm saying that if people say they are "pro-life", they often only care what happens to a fetus but they don't seem to care what happens after the child is born. society shuns or bullies those with a difference. they don't care for the disabled.

that's what i find hypocritical.

i didn't say that you do that.

Yeah , gosh my friend had 7 children and then at 45 she had her 8th child. He was born with a hole in his heart and Down's Syndrome. Do they love that child any less ? Certainly not ! Is he valued any less. Certainly not ! They view this child just like all the other children that they have - a defininate gift from God. If I had a friend that chose to abort their baby for having Downs or any such condition, I would be spitting nails !!

My nephew has autism. This is horrible.

This will be a hotly debated item in the future as technology to detect birth defects or certain genes early is realized on a large scale. I am glad that I won't have to worry about any of that. We didn't even want to know what sex our kids were going to be before they were born. Old fashioned I guess, because everybody else we know thought we were nuts, ha ha.
Thanks for the article.

i think this is an individual decision.
but i'm still stuck on whether i would want to be born. haven't resolved that one, lol.

If I got pregnant right now and found out the kid would have something like Down's Syndrome, I would probably abort it. I am certainly in no position to properly care for a child with that sort of issue, nor would I trust an adoptive family with a kid who needed that level of care. There are far too many foster homes where kids are neglected and abused.

My cousin is retarded. They could not have predicted it beforehand since it happened during birth (umbilical cord wrapped around the head).

My aunt and uncle are successful people who have good jobs and also have some family money (on my aunt's side) so they are able to support my cousin in an adult home where she gets care 24/7.

I love my cousin...but I also know first-hand the type of emotional and financial burden such a child places on a family.

No, I would not have a child with Down's. Autism is possibly caused by candida and other environmental toxins, so that might be different, since it's curable...but I can't tell you now what I'd ultimately choose.

Gee , I wish I had not read the above comment , now I am feeling just ill !!