Are YOU a nutjob? Here's a test to find out:
- When someone on Gather.com is critical of an article, comment, or image that you have posted, do you
- Respond in kind
- Launch a personal attack on that person
- Use whatever personal information they have innocently revealed on Gather to track them down, call them at home, and read them the riot act?
- How often have you tried to find out another Gatherer's home phone number, address, or other personal information based on their user name, namespace ID, or what they have posted previously?
- Never
- Once, but she said my momma wears combat boots
- If they are dumb enough to leave me a trail of identifying tidbits of information, I would be remiss in not using it for diabolical purposes.
- How many articles have you published about the afterlife, immorality, the tortures of hell, your personal conversations with God, or why your lifestyle is morally superior to anyone else's?
- None
- One
- What other kinds of articles are there, devil-worshipper?
- How often do you find yourself actually screaming at other Gatherers through your computer screen?
- Never
- Sometimes
- My voice is perpetually hoarse from doing so.
Calculating your Score:
For every a) answer, subtract a point.
For every b) answer, add a point.
For every c), add 4 points.
Results:
-4 to 0 points: You are not a nutjob. Proceed as usual.
0 to 4 points: You are living on the border of Nuttyville. Take a yoga class, or read some Thich Nhat Hanh books for good measure.
More than 4 points: You're a nutjob! Please get psychiatric help. Immediately, if not sooner.


Comments: 39
5. How often do you make it a practice to rate-and-run?
a) Never
b) Once, but only because my ISP crashed before I could get my comment posted
c) You can rate an article AND comment on it?
I see no reason to believe that it's necessary to post a comment to every article I find totally insipid, or contrived for the sole purpose of gathering Gather points. If you put up an "article" that consists entirely of something like this:"How many angels do YOU think can sit on the head of a pin?", stand by for a 1, and no brownie points for getting me to waste my time composing a comment. 'nuff said.
When someone actually puts forth a modicum of effort, however, and is sincere in their purpose (whether that purpose is to publish a short story, a recipe, a movie review, or a piece of satire), a "1" rating appears to be a personal attack, and in my opinion, personal attacks are nutjob-esque behavior.
In closing, I do not deem you to be a nutjob for rating and running when the author of the article you're hitting with a "1" took no time or effort to put forth an idea, concept, or at least share THEIR take on the subject matter before hitting the comments section.
Thanks for commenting - and thanks too, AG, Kate, and Angela.
2) B, but the information was useless, as anyone could leave a trail of crumbs leading to an innocent third party.
3) A, though I did publish an article on my belief in the here an now.
4) C (sort of). I couldn't drive, work or carry on a conversation until I got back to a computer to let him know what I thought.
Actually, I am a bit delusional in that I behave as though I know what's going on. We all do, and in honor of that human tendency I follow the motto "If you're not confused, odds are you haven't been paying attention."
And Marsha, as for you... well, what the hell. Sure. We can all be nutjobs. The first one to call my house, however, will find him- or herself to be the recipient of one serious World of Hurt. I know that won't be you, however, Marsha, Marsha, MARSHA! [stomping my foot for effect]
I did not find this post insipid, and rating without commenting is frowned on big time in the community. This was humorous and spoke directly to some of the poor behavior that goes on here.
(Parke, you can breathe easily today. I can't find my phone book.)
2. a) because I'm lazy
3. c) (you have seen my articles, right?)
4. d) spewing coffee and/or prime time beverage at humor and/or stupidity of comments
5. c) definitely
This should be the required entrance exam to gather.
My boring score: -4
As for lowballing me, I think it's only fair. I gave a couple of bzz agent articles a low rating today just for giggles. I feel bad about it, and I promise not to do it again. Today.
Sandy, everything I do, I do it for you. And so I'm blue. Achoo.
Also, anyone scoring a -4 gets a free hug. ((((((((AUNTIE)))))))))
I scream, rant and rave at our President when he makes speeches on TV; I throw the snuggle bear at Sean Hannity and yell out at his idiocy. I download pictures of O'Reilly to make dart boards out of them (after I blackout his eyes, draw horns, and add drool & a loofah), and yell at his idiotic misstatements, and off the wall debates. I'd never understood the word apoplectic, until I watched Ann Coulter pretend to be a journalist....then I experienced an apoplectic fit.
I enjoy debating the stray cat from across the street, after a rousing hour or two of Fox faux news talking points. I truly believe he is a disaffected Republican (he lives under the car bumper with a Bush/Cheney 04 sticker). I explain the facts of life and how they impact his well being; the high price of kibble, why his owners had to toss him to the street when their kids college tuition costs skyrocketed, and they lost their health insurance. He was just the sad remains of a middle class family having to tighten the belt straps, and get rid of any unnecessary expenses.
My progressive cat is really trying to lead him towards the light (our porch light), explain how the new Congress will make it better for all middle class pets, and give him a paw up, so the illegal Chihuahua next door won't get all the attention and scraps. But other than that, I'm completely normal.
He pointed out that when one needs to learn more about another Gatherer, one can go to their namespace and make a fairly accurate determination of their nutjob status by reviewing their articles. To remove any doubt from anyone's minds, I published "I am not a nutjob." Within mere hours of that, however, I bore witness to some really zany nutjob behavior on Gather, and thus, this less-than-brilliant piece was born.
And St. Joan, if I am being tracked down, I feel fairly secure that my labrador retrievers can make short work of anyone who darkens my door by viciously licking their faces, smothering them in shed hair, and finally bludgeoning them to death with their enthusiastically wagging tails.
Terry, you kill me. And once again, dear Gatherers... I am instinctively cupping myself.
Which is exactly why I connected to you. It works!
Sandy, if I knew my article was going to have such an effect on you, I surely would have titled it "Sandy Knauer is my secret Gather Stalker."
And terry, I've relinquished the crown. Go crazy, my liege.
Wait a second. I called a fellow Gatherer at work, in another country far far away....but I knew her BEFORE I joined Gather. Does that still make me a nut-job? I also recently got off the phone with a Gatherer in AZ, and one from Florida called me a couple of nights ago....but I knew those two before Gather too. Does all this still count?
Oh, Donna, you're asking the wrong person about digging delicious things. I haven't the slightest. Tom Gerace wrote an article about it, though (click here for more).
The comment you made about your son on another article was all I needed to know about you to affirm in my mind that you were someone I wanted to connect with. Thank you for accepting and I am humbled and happy to call you my friend.