Why “The One-Life Solution?”

This book was a little bit of a surprise for me. It began with the idea of writing “Boundaries At Work,” as it is such a needed topic. Think for a moment how many times you have wished you had set better boundaries with a difficult co-worker, boss, client, or direct report. “Why did I let that happen?” or “How can I stop this?” are questions with which many people can identify. Setting limits can be very difficult at work when your livelihood depends on not blowing it up. In my consulting practice, I had seen this issue be so important in so many situations, so it seemed like a big need.

Then, as I began to talk to my editors and really flesh out the topic, I realized that our boundary issues go much deeper and broader than just setting boundaries in the work context. There was also the issue of setting boundaries not just “at work,” but also “on work.” The problem began with the pager, then the cell phone, then e mail, and now the ever-present Blackberry or PDA. Technology has enabled your boss, clients, co-workers and pretty much whoever wants to, to find you and send you all the work they want. All they have to do is hit Send. Work can now follow you anywhere (the space boundaries on work are gone), and work can find you anytime (the time boundaries on work are gone).

What this has done has left people without the space and time boundaries to do two things: focus on what is most important to their real goals and objectives, and have time, space and energy to have a real life. So, without space and time boundaries to protect us, what is left to guard our time, energy and focus?  Only our own boundaries. Our own abilities to stay in control of ourselves and what is important and to not allow other people’s agendas, dysfunction, irresponsibility, or even good intentions to take control of us is all we have. The problem is how to do that.

So, I wrote to One-Life Solution to show that in this age of work and life being so merged together, that the concept of balancing work and life no longer applies. They are not as separate as they used to be, but much more integrated. That requires us to be integrated. The One-Life Solution is about having an integrated life that works, so that you are no longer torn apart, feeling fragmented and scattered. Instead of “balancing work and life,” the book will help you to “integrate yourself,” and develop a life that comes from your core passions and values, and delivers the results that you desire.

But, as it is a book about both work and life, it does talk a lot about work, in two ways. First, it gets to the real issues that create successful performance. I show how success cannot occur without healthy boundaries and how to develop them. And, the second way is that you will only enjoy your work to the degree that you are fully engaged, and in control of what you deem important. The book will show you how to do that. I will share with you many stories from my consulting practice that show how successful people have both….good results and a lot of joy in what they do. And, as you shall see, you can too.

Henry Cloud, Ph.D.

Los Angeles, CA 2008

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