SITUATION and SOLUTION

I would speak nicely to the man and tell him he's not in the open country now and that some people are surprised and embarrassed seeing him answer nature's call outdoors in view of others. Ask for him to cooperate and use the indoor facilities.

(If that doesn't work, lock him in his room or put diapers on him--ha!)

I'd start by asking him why he does it, since he has all his mentality. Then see if I could come up with a solution he would agree to--again, since he has all his mentality. Could be there was something in the bathroom that irritated him, like a product being used that was too perfume-y, or he had difficulty reaching or handling things inside. But since he could answer, I'd talk first.

He sounds like he needs his own private spot out side somewhere .

Well, let me tell you.... my husband and my son always enjoyed going outside and peeing on the grapevine that we planted the year we moved in the house. That grapevine took over the whole wall, so it must have been good for it. Sometimes, guys just nee a place outside to do their thing...it makes them feel like a man, I guess.

How do you change the spots on a leopard? I actually know someone who is alive and healthy(well, maybe not mentally healthy) and he does that. It's as if they are pissing on the universe! Why not ask him why?

It may be his aim and he is embarrassed about it. Talk to him. You may have to get a men's urinal installed in your bathroom, might be easier for him to manage.

If he was a rodeo man, he was probably used to doing this outside and may honestly not realize the problem.
I understood you to state that he has his right mind. Assuming this, could someone who is compassionate and loving, explain that it is a problem and politely ask if he can refrain from doing it as much as possible. It may just work.

Is there anyway you can 'provide' a sheltered outdoor area for this 'cowboy' since he doesn't seem to catch the drift that it is not a 'proper' thing to do in civilized public areas?

Seriously ... although then you would have to monitor the 'health' situation of the area as well. Hopefully he does not do this in other situation other than the Foster Home area?

But reality calls for the cowboy to come up to some homogenized standard of living now too ... if he is really mentally okay ...

Then the mother of persuasion needs to be used. Adult Foster Care sounds like he is an out of luck cowboy who can't provide for himself ... and therefore needs to bend to the rules of living in a public home.

Is he communicating? Is he just old & set in his ways? What have you communicated so far to Cowboy Joe?

This will be an interesting follow up. Keep us posted. Good luck too & my prayers are with you and the whole situation.

cl

Let him go outside and revieve himself.
Talk with him and together decide on a tree or two where he might do his duty.
then either put up a privacy curtain or plant something that will give the world a sheild from him going.
Look he deserves the respect of age. Let this good old boy help in deciding the solution.
If by chance he is doing this to be nonconformist then you might have a long day in front of you. Keep me posted on what happens.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Sorry, that cracks me up, he is an old man for heavens sake, I agree that a place should be set aside for him outside where no one can peek. Everyone else can just get over it.

hi , i would say to him, that he has left his mark his territory is marked, you dont have to do this any more, be glad you have marked your turf, but it is stating to smell and people are noticing, so be so kind and take others to your mind, we have a toilet and it belongs inside, your not on a ranch and this aint raw hide, the police are watching so go inside, else you will encourge others with less in the mind to crap because they think out of time set an exsample your one of a kind would you like to find shit walked in ,ware you home is ware your it...or something along them lines

A fence people can't see through? Don't let him out the front door, and have a place out back where he can pee?

If he is fully mentally stable I would talk to him and let him know how others feel about his actions and that you are already in trouble with the neighbors and the other residents visitors due to his actions. He can go pee inside just like everybody else does or he can find another place to live.

Good luck with this one, I know old men can be funny on this subject. It sounds like it is something he has probally always done.

The Rolling Stones used to do that too (hmm..maybe still do?!). I think you have a lot of possible approaches. You could get one of those target-aim lights for the toilet that projects a target right on the water. Or get a whole bunch of people assembled to mass-embarass him, if that would work. Or like Patrick suggested, give him some kind of provision outside. Get one of those little camping toilets and let him enjoy the great outdoors -- he can pretend he's back on the horse and riding the wild range!

If there is an element of exhibitionism involved, you could be looking at at sexual dysfunction or deviancy. You would need to consult a psychologist, as the specifics are difficult to assess in the context of a blog. Clues would include use of time, socialization and interactions with clients and staff. This sort of thing is probably treatable.

Going along with Dave, I'd say a comprehensive medical and psychiatric evaluation needs to be done before treatment can be implemented.

I don't know what's more intertaining--the "situation" or all of the solutions above. Well, I will go ahead and add my two cents. Maybe he needs to be given rewards for doing things the "right" way--sort of like you do with a child. A chart in the bathroom that he places a star each time he pees in the toilet. When he fills up the chart, he gets a reward! Hmmm...

Good grief! I'm really glad I'm not stuck with this one. I'm with the folks who say to give him a private place outdoors. Men for some reason seem to enjoy peeing outside. It may be one of the few small pleasures left to him.

I'd plant a nice healthy bush. Or show him a nice area with lots of undergrowth.

My husband and son always pee out in the wide open on golf courses. There could be a nice little bathroom nearby, but they always pick a tree. Why is that?

Thank You everyone for all the responses.
This is a past SITUATION I faced when I had my care home so here is how I handled it.
!st. I plainly spoke to him about what he was doing and that I did not have a problem with it but neighbors did. So he then began going around the house to the side where there were trees to cover him from the public. But I guess it must not of covered him all the way because some how the state got hold that he was doing this and well they made a visit to the home. They told me I could not allow this to continue. I told them you tell him that then. So they talked to him and we agreed on a urinal in his room. I never found out why he did not want to use the toilet to urinate and I just figured it was the cowboy thing.

I think the biggest thing is to speak to them like an equal, not like someone above them. I also think that you should make sure to let them know exactly what is going on ( the neighbors getting upset and the bathroom being open and such). If he has all his mentality (but other than this problem he is not a trouble maker) then he should think about itt reasonably and come to start using the inside bathroom and to stop using the great outdoors as his personal bathroom.

I can't offer a solution for this, but it has made an interesting discussion. Good luck.

Thanks for reading and commenting Cortney and Amanda and all

Wow, that's one I hadn't heard before. Sounds like you handled it just fine though. We went through this with our son when he was a boy, so perhaps it is a boy thing lol.

Thanks Quinn and David.