You Ask The Questions...I Give The Answers

It seems like everyone wants to know something; whether it's simply to learn about someone they really don't know all that well...or just to be nosy.  It doesn't matter the reason.  We, as a people, simply have a natural curiosity.  When we run up against something we don't know about; the inquisitive side in us comes out.  It starts at a very early age.  As a child, one of our favorite questions to ask is, 'Why?'  Aside from being taught various things; this is how young ones find out what they don't know.  We teach them what they seek out by giving them the answers they're looking for to satisfy the inquisitiveness.

Over the course of the past year, I've faced many questions I never dreamed I'd have asked of me; not only by little ones, but by adults alike.  With a prosthetic leg now, I no longer am asked the question that was on everyone's mind.  It's not as obvious anymore.  'What happened to your leg?'...or...'Where did your leg go?'  Depending on who is inquiring determines the answer I give.  I don't go into a long, drawn out reply; one of the few times I keep things short and to the point.  Could you ever imagine someone as long-winded as I am would keep a response to the bare minimum?  I don't get into all the details; just a few facts in words people can understand, especially with youngsters.  My explaination...I had a boo boo and nobody kissed it to make it better.  That's why you should always tell your mommy when you have an owie.  Give it to them in terms they can comprehend.

I'm sure you've all seen some of the many 'surveys' that have circulated on Gather in regards to various topics.  Lots of you have participated in providing your own answers to the questions that have been asked.  Many of you have seen my versions.  None of those 'Yes', 'No' or one word answers from me, except for one 'survey' where only one word answers were a requirement.  That 'survey' was a killer for me...to provide such short replies.  I like to make answers interesting, entertaining and somewhat humorous, if at all possible...and honest.  I have nothing to hide.  If someone wants to find out things about me...find out, you will.

I recent ran across a 'survey' entitled '50 Annoying Questions'.  I didn't think they were all that aggravating, but some may be put off by having so much asked at one time.  In light of what this 'survey' was called, here are my '50 Annoying Answers'...

1. What color is your toothbrush?  Dealing with recent health issues; these problems have caused the majority of my teeth to either break off or fall out.  Out of the 32 teeth an adult has; I only have 10 1/2 left; three on the top and 7 1/2 on the bottom.  With me, this 'oral utensil' is very appropriately called a 'tooth' brush...and the one I currently use is green.

2. Name one person who made you smile today.  This early in the day, seeing how I'm filling out this 'survey' before 8 AM on a Monday, I have yet to run across anyone directly face-to-face...and haven't since Friday afternoon...Mike, a guy I met at one of the cafes I go to who I invited to sit with me for coffee seeing how all the outdoor seating was taken and I had three open chairs at my table.  Talking with my best friend, Scott, on the computer last night; he was the last person who gave me a grin.  He's always able to do that, no matter how we communicate; through a chat messenger, on the telephone or in person.  He knows just the right things to say to lift my spirits.

3. What were you doing at 8 AM today?  I was in the process of providing answers to these '50 Annoying Questions' while writing this post; sitting at my computer having my morning coffee.

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?  Seeing how it's now a bit before 9 AM, I am doing the same thing I was at 8 AM...the same answer as above.

5. What is your favorite candy bar?  I wished I had been asked about cookies.  I would have replied, 'All of them'.  I do like many different candy bars...Three Musketeers, Milky Way, Zagnut, Clark Bars and many, many more.  The one I like the most is a throw-back from my childhood; one I can no longer find being sold from candy displays.  It's a memory that represents Halloween for me.  The only time I've seen it available is around this holiday...and then, it's only snack size mixed in an assortment bag...O'Henry.

6. Have you ever been to a strip club?  There's none in the small town area I grew up in.  It took a vacation trip to Boston to visit an old friend several years ago before I ever had this opportunity...and I wasn't all that worked up over it for obvious reasons.  Darin took me to the 'Pussycat Club' in Providence, Rhode Island.  It was his favorite strip joint.  He was such a regular there; we got a seat right down front so he could stuff dollar bills into what little clothing the girls were wearing.  Not me, though!  Seeing how I'm not into nearly naked gals; the only way I was going to tip them was if they put their clothes back on! I have a much better time watching go go boys dancing or going to a male strip club.  Bring on the Chippendales...Woo Hoo!  I'm sure lots of you ladies will agree with me on that one.

7. What was the last thing you said aloud?  It used to be I'd go days at a time without hearing my own voice, as I had no one to talk to...and I'm not one to sit around talking to myself.  I may be goofy, but I'm not THAT goofy.  Since Scott gave me a kitty for Christmas, I can vocalize at home and not wonder if I'm cracking up.  Upon arising this morning, The Shim was waiting patiently for me to haul my butt out of bed to feed her.  I greeted her with, 'Good morning, baby.  How's my good girl today?'

8. What is your favorite ice cream flavor?  When it comes to frozen custard, I only eat vanilla soft serve.  I enjoy several flavors of traditional hard packed ice cream with strawberry at the top of my list.

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?  I'm still in the process of drinking it...a pot of black coffee.  Before that, to wet my whistle upon waking up, I usually have a small glass of strawberry-kiwi juice...no sugar added...that is, if I haven't run out and forgotten to get more.

10. Do you like your wallet?  I rarely ever carry a wallet for fear of losing it...and everything it contained, especially my cash.  I carry everything in my right front pants pocket...my folding money, of which I don't have a lot, shoppers club cards to a couple stores, insurance cards and my driver's license.  Even though I can no longer drive, I carry it for identification purposes.  The last time I had an actual wallet, it was stolen out of my car glove compartment 15 years ago.  Imagine that thief's surprise when he got somewhere to open it and found nothing but the lucky penny that was inside when the wallet was given to me.  My mother had given the wallet and penny to me as a gift.  She explained you never give an empty wallet or purse as a present.  There should always be some money in it.  A single penny, though?  Cheap woman!

11. What was the last thing you ate?  I wasn't too hungry late last night; the only time I eat; so for dinner, I had Easter 'leftovers'.  No ham or hard boiled eggs.  They're already gone.  I had a couple pieces of extra sharp cheddar cheese on fire roasted tomato Triscuits and five yellow chickie Peeps..my main course and dessert.

12. Have you bought any new clothing items this week?  There are no clothing stores convenient for me to get to; not even a thrift shop to pick up something 'new to me'.  Over the past two years, I've purchased a couple pair of socks at a drug store on the next block from me...and a pair of second hand gray jeans I bought on line.  With the problem I've had in the past of my mail being stolen, I don't want to buy that way again.  That trouble has been taken care of now, hopefully, after filing a complaint with the United States Postmaster General since my local post office wouldn't do a thing about it...and an order was issued the local postal deliverer must bring any packages right to my door rather than leave them in a common area where everyone has access to them.  Otherwise, any clothing I get are hand-me-downs from my best friend.

13. What was the last sporting event you watched?  I'm a big auto racing fan and I caught the NASCAR Sprint Cup race Saturday night from Phoenix, Arizona. Though I wanted my favorite, Jeff Gordon, to win, it was nice seeing Mark Martin win for the first time in nearly 100 races; almost 4 years since he's taken a checkered flag.  At age 50, now, he can finally retire knowing he's still got the winning edge in him.  At least Jeff is still the points leader.

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?  I like popcorn flavored popcorn; not covered in caramel, chocolate or cheese.  Drizzle a little butter on mine and dump lots of salt on, too.

15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to?  Seeing how I don't own a cell phone, I've never sent a text message to anyone.  I've only ever used a cell phone belonging to someone else a couple of times.  They're too complicated for an electronic gadget moron like me...and too expensive.  I only text on my computer through chat messengers...and that was to Scott last night.

16. Ever go camping?  Only once in my life...and that cured me of ever wanting to go again.  I ended up driving all the way back home to spend the night in my own apartment.  My idea of 'roughing it' is a 5 star hotel with an indoor pool and room service. Sleeping on the ground in the middle of the woods with bugs and critters is NOT a good time in my book.  Where are all my luxuries from home?  No electric, TV, fridge, running water, toilet, comfortable bed...no Rob...no way!

17. Do you take vitamins daily?  Despite being told I should take them, along with other supplements...if it doesn't come in the foods and drinks I consume...it doesn't go in my mouth.  The only time I ever get anything extra is if I have a cold...and then, I'll drink a little additional unsweetened grapefruit juice.  That's it.

18. Do you go to church every Sunday?  I haven't been to a regular church service in over 25 years, when I was confirmed from St. Paul's Episcopal church, which I attended while growing up.  I didn't care for our reverend..or the lack of answers to the questions about religion I had, so I left. The last time I even stepped inside a church was a funeral service for an uncle 7 years ago.  Though I don't consider myself to be religious; I am spiritual.  Now, God comes to my house.  I don't have to go to His.

19. Do you have a tan?  I am not a sun worshipper.  I don't ever wear shorts, especially now with a fake leg.  I don't swim and I don't hang out in the sun.  I never take my shirt off while in public, either.  About the only color I get is from the television.  My skin is a tone I call 'TV dinner mashed potato white'.  On the rare occassion I do get some sunshine, it's only enough to give me a farmer's tan...my lower arms that aren't covered by a tee shirt.

20. Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza?  I have ordered Chinese delivery in the past and do enjoy going to a Chinese buffet once in awhile, but I usually only eat 'American' food they offer. They make Chinese French fries just like we do!  I don't know what a lot of the dishes they offer even are and I'm not about to try some of that stuff and end up not liking it.  Not to mention, I don't know what animal some of their meat comes from.  Seriously, the only time I have ever seen gray meat is when I dissected a cat in Anatomy and Physiology class in college.  No thank you! If I have a choice, I'll take a piping hot pizza. I like a pizzeria pie best, but the ones I make at home are pretty tasty, too...and much cheaper.  For a couple dollars, I can make one they charge $10 more for in a shop...and I use a 5 cheese blend; mozzarella, cheddar, Swiss, muenster, and parmesan.  No other toppings required.

21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?  I drink out of the bottle or can if that's the way I buy it.  When I'm out to a restaurant and it's served in a glass; I always use a straw.  Not only does the carbonation tickle my nose, I don't know if the glass is really all that clean...or who drank out of it last.

22. What did your last text message say?  As previously said, I don't do cell phones; only my computer to 'chat'.  Since I was talking with Scott last night, when our conversation ended with him heading off to bed, the last thing I typed to him was, 'Good night.  Sleep tight.  I love you.'

23. What are you doing tomorrow?  Since it's going to be Tuesday, it's my 'Battle the Blue Hair Day'.  I'll be going to the supermarket to make my way through a store full of senior citizens while trying to get the groceries on my list before they buy everything...running an obstacle course navigating around them and cash out to make my shopping trip in under two hours because of having so many of them in my way.

24. What would you being doing tomorrow if you weren't doing what you already have planned?  I'd be sitting around my apartment puttering on my computer, take at least one daily walk and maybe stop for coffee at a cafe up the block from where I live.  I'll probably end up doing that anyway in addition to going for gorceries.

25. Look to you left and what do you see?  I have a 2009 calendar hanging on the wall next to me.  I have so little going on in my life; I sometimes forget what day it is.  This helps prevent me from 'losing' a day.

26. What color is your watch?  Time is irrelevant to me for the most part.  I don't even own a watch and haven't since I was in my mid-teens.  I have a clock on the computer, a wall clock in the kitchen and a mantle clock on top of my CD rack.  I don't need one attached to my wrist, too.

27. What do you think of when you hear Australia?  Probably the same thing most people think of...kangaroos.  I also think about a duckbill platypus, the outback, aborigines, the land down under and more.  The main thing, though...Tie me kangaroo down, sport.

28. What is your birthstone?  Despite claiming my birthday is February 30th, since no one ever remembers it anyway, it's really in May, though I'm not giving the date.  May's birthstone is the emerald; one of my favorite jewel; along with rubies and diamonds.

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?  Even when I had a car and was able to drive; I learned my lesson with drive thru windows.  It seemed like I'd always discover an item was omitted from my order or not prepared the way I wanted and I'd either have to go back or lose money on something I didn't get.  I rarely eat in a fast food restaurant, but it got to the point I'd go inside to order, so I could check my food before I left to make sure they got it right.  It was much easier to make a stink over mistakes if I was standing right there when I discovered their screw up. Also, if I decided I wanted something additional, like a side of that guy standing there; I was already in line and could order more easily.

30. What is your favorite number?  I don't have a favorite individual number.  I have a couple favorite combinations that always seem to pop up in my life.  My top number is 311.  That happened to be my street address house number where I lived during my adolescent years. My second favorite is 1240.  That was the dial position of an AM radio station I used to listen to all the time on a small transistor when I was little.

31. Who was the last person you talked to on the telephone?  Other than bill collectors and telemarketers; I rarely talk to anyone on the phone...because I don't know that many people to talk to.  Since my best friend and I are in contact almost daily in one form or another; Scott was the last person I talked to when he called me this past Thursday.  Bill collectors and telemarketers I don't talk to.  I just hang up on them.

32. Any plans for today?  Other than writing this post, I'll go out for one of my walks; then come home and fart around on the computer until I watch a little television later and have my daily meal before I go to bed.   Such an exciting life I lead.

33. How many states have you lived in?  I've pretty much spent my entire life living in New York State.  I did spend a couple months several years ago in Texas.  I went down to stay with Scott in anticipation of eventually relocating to Houston to live where he moved.  We decided we hated the city for various reasons and before I was scheduled to return to New York to pack for a permanent move down there; he decided to come back home to Rochester, so I'm still living in the Empire State.

34. What is your biggest annoyance right now?  There are several things that irritate me; not having enough money, not being able to go anywhere due to a lack of transportation, not having friends (other than Scott) in my real life and a few others.  The thing that annoys me the most, despite having a prosthetic, is not having my right leg.  I can't just get up and go.  I have to hobble around with a walker until I can put my fake leg on to be able to do anything.

35. What was the last song you listened to?  I'm sure almost everyone has heard it by now...and if you haven't; you really need to listen to it.  While checking my E-mail when I first got up this morning, I was playing 'I Dreamed A Dream' from Les Miserables, performed by singing sensation, Susan Boyle, from her performance on 'Britain's Got Talent.  It still moves me after hearing it for about the one hundredth time.

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards?  It wasn't something I learned specifically how to do, but it was easy enough to accomplish the couple times I've been requested to do so.  Why would anyone ask a person to do this?  I had been pulled over for suspicion of driving while intoxicated, which I wasn't under the influence at all.  After being asked to recite the alphabet, I was told to say it backwards in hopes of me slipping up.  In my head, as I said the letters out loud, I was singing the letters in reverse to myself to 'The Alphabet Song'.  It worked.  Not one mistake and I was released to go on my merry way.

37. Do you have a maid service clean your house?  Wouldn't that be lovely?  I keep giving Gather members my address hoping one of you will stalk me, break into my home and clean my apartment.  No takers so far.  The only cleaner I have is myself, even though I refuse to wear one of those little black French maid outfits with the lace apron.  I'd have to get rid of all my mirrors first.  The sight alone would make me sick to my stomach...and then, I'd have even more of a mess to clean up.

38. What is your favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?  I get lazy in having to change shoes all the time on my fake foot, a much more difficult task than with a real foot...and I'd look pretty ridiculous wear two different shoes...so I usually have on a pair of black New Balance sneakers.  With size 16 EEEEE feet, it's not like I have a large assortment of footwear to beging with.

39. Are you jealous of anyone?  I could be jealous of anyone who has two legs and leads a normal life with enough money to get by on, but that would get me nowhere.  Things happen and we just have to learn to accept them and go on.  I really don't get jealous...unless someone is hitting on my romantic partner.  Since I don't have one; there's no need for me to be jealous at all.

40. Is anyone jealous of you?  Come on...take a look at me and what's happened in my life.  Seriously, why would anyone be jealous of me?  If anything, everyone is happy they're not me!

41. Do you love anyone?  I'm not 'in love' with anyone.  There's no romance in my life...and hasn't been for quite awhile.  It's been over 10 years since I've had a 'special someone'.  Despite that, I do have love.  Scott and I love one another very much...and are secure enough with ourselves to express that feeling to each other.  There has never been anything romantic between us.  Our best friendship is purely platonic...and that's as far as it will ever go.  We're like family.  He's like my little brother and we don't want to ruin what we share now by going any further.  However, I could easily fall in love with another guy who has the same values, morals and standards as Scott possesses.  I'd just want that guy to have a different appearance.  It would be way too freaky if they looked alike.

42. Do any of your friends have children?  Being gay, Scott doesn't have any kids...unless you count his puppy; Dakota, the Pooper Dog...my 'nephew'.  If you want to include Tiger, my 'secret lover', who is even less than an acquaintance now; he has two sons with his ex-wife.  Former friends have had children, but they're all in the past.

43. What do you usually do during the day?  As I've explained before, with the life I lead now, I don't do much of anything.  It's pretty much the same day after day...I start with my morning coffee, hang out on the computer a lot, do some Gathering, take a walk or two, watch a bit of television in the evening, eat my daily meal late at night; then go to bed.  Next day...repeat.  Boring!

44. Do you hate anyone that you know right now?  The only person I hate; I only know of.  We've never met in person and I plan on never letting that happen...or I'll kill him.  The one I have such strong feelings against is my real life stalker, who's been at it for a few years.  He 'wants' me and he doesn't stand a snowball's chance in hell of ever getting what he wants.  If I ever do run into him; I won't say a word.  I'll just wrap my hands around his throat and choke him to death...so I can watch his eyes bug out as he takes his last breath.  How's that for hating someone?

45. Do you use the word 'hello' daily?  I don't even run into people most days to be able to say 'hello' to.  If I do greet someone, I usually say, 'Hey'...unless it's Scott. Then, it's 'Hay-ay', said with a phonie gay accent.

46. What color is your car?  Being unable to drive with a missing leg; I don't have a car now.  The last ones I had were a cream Lincoln Town Car and a beige LeBaron convertible.  Actually, I got rid of them several years ago when gas first hit $2 a gallon.  I managed to avoid when the price went up to nearly $5 a gallon by unloading  those gas hogs.

47. Do you like cats?  I love all kinds of animals, especially cats, because they're so independent and require little care.  That's one of the reasons Scott gave me Shimmer as a Christmas present.  I've had four kitties in my adult life.  In addition to The Shim; I also had Fugi, another black and white, a gray and black tiger, Renne, and an orange tiger, Butcher.  I'd really like a dog, but Scott keeps insisting that would be too much work for me because I'd have to walk it all the time.  I wish I could get him to realize I'm quite able to walk now, especially when he tells me I can't walk...while we're walking down the street together.  Hello?  What the hell do you think I'm doing right now?  Well, then, the stairs are too much for you to keep going up and down.  Duh!  How do you think I leave and come back to my apartment?  It's no different if I had to walk a dog...not like I'm going to be carrying a 200 pound Newfoundland or anything like that.  A puppy is quite capable of doing the stairs on its own.

48. Are you thinking about someone right now?  Since I really don't have many people in my life; I'm always thinking about someone; whether it's Scott, some of my Gather friends, my 'secret lover' or strangers.  If I actually had people around me; I'm sure I'd think of others a lot less.  I wouldn't have to think of them because they'd be right there.

49. Have you ever been to Six Flags?  I love amusement parks and the rides, and despite having a Six Flags a little over half an hour away; I've never been to it. Scott has gone several times, but it's always with others. They're not friends with me, so I'm never included.  I've only been to an amusement park twice in my adult life.  Back in the late 1990's, my first fiancee and I went on vacation to Niagara Falls, Canada.  While she stayed in bed sleeping back at the hotel; I went to Marineland by myself.  Four years ago, when Scott and I went on vacation to Pennsylvania, we went to Hershey Park.  Maybe someday...maybe not.

50. How did you get your worst scar?  Having a leg chopped off leaves a pretty bad scar, as you could imagine. Prior to that, the worst scar I had was when I had my left index finger amputated.  The only other scars are quite small...all under an inch.  Most were just from bumps and cuts to my shins after running into a coffee table or something else.  (I only have one leg to worry about doing that to now.)  When I was five, I put my right hand through a picture window at home.  That left a small scar on the top of my hand and another one on my wrist, though there is a thin scar that runs the full length of my pinkie finger that is barely noticeable.

There you go...the answers to the questions...none of which I think were too annoying; at least not as annoying as I can be.  As 'survey's go around on Gather, if you'd care to follow suit...be my guest.  Help yourself.  Your replies don't have to be quite as elaborate as mine.  Fill your 'survey' out any way you'd like.  I know I, and many others, would enjoy hearing your responses.  I'm not tagging anyone, so whomever would like to take part can do so whenever you'd like.  We'll all be looking forward to seeing what answers you come up with.  Have fun and enjoy!