NEWTON UPPER HILLS, Mass. This suburb to the west of Boston boasts a highly-educated population with a love of reading, as well as a large population of dogs. "We're not called the Garden City for nothing," says Amy Zuckerman with a smile, as her Lhasa Apso "Dylan"--named for Dylan Thomas--sniffs the private parts of Heinzie, a stand-offish dachsund, on a playground near the Eliot trolley stop.
Dylan Thomas: "Do not go gently into that dark vet's office . . ."
The two phenomena came together in a highly-successful "Reading to Dogs" program at the city's schools and public library, where young children read to non-judgmental therapy dogs who listen attentively, thereby instilling confidence in students who might falter in front of their classmates. "It's been great for Josh," says Marci Haskell. "The kids in his second grade class threw spitballs at him when he mispronounced 'onomatopoeia'."
"Do you have Truman Capote's 'Other Voices, Other Rooms'?"
But local cat lovers became upset when they saw the cost of the program--$12,000--in the city's budget, and demanded equal time for their pets. "The Reading to Dogs program was a classic example of bare-knuckled special interest politics," says Clyde Williams, head of "Leash Law Vigilantes", a local anti-dog advocacy group. "Why should we be subsidizing a bunch of mutts who do nothing but foul our sidewalks and bite the Greenpeace canvassers--not that there's anything wrong with that."
"I'm too tired to read. Turn on Sportscenter."
So a separate "Reading to Cats" program was started this fall with high hopes of bringing the joys of literature to children with feline friends, beginning with Saturday story hour sessions. Less than four months later, the initiative has fallen apart with finger-pointing, recriminations and allegations of fraud. "No good deed goes unpunished," says Mitzi Raposa, the owner of two tabbies whom she volunteered as participants.
"You know what you can do with your Newbury Prize-winning story of a boy and his dog."
"Basically, cats aren't good listeners," says Ellen Janeway, an assistant librarian. "It took forever for them to sit down, and when they did they went right to sleep. It was turning off a lot of kids."
Cat-lovers say they will re-tool the program to make it more appropriate for cats' shorter attention spans and lack of interest in activities other than eating, sleeping and chasing mice. "When they're high on catnip they seem to like Beat poets," says early education specialist Gwendolyn Hambrecht, "and they love 'Old Yeller'."


Comments: 19
But what use has a cat for reading? They know everything already.
Except how to operate the electric can opener.
Their reaction: Where's the beef?
I must go fetch said beef. Meow. Great article.
I featured this article on Gather Essential: Writing and provided a link from Humor Monday Update: 09/08/2008
I want a dog named Phydeaux and a cat named Floughfi.
My cat, upon reflection, suggests that the $12,000 go to cat treats and toys.
She has a list.
I've heard vicious rumors that funding is also to be cut for the circus beavers yo-yo tricks and unicycle crash test college. Ohhhh the humanity!!!! Write your dam congresspersons people.