"R'sd B'mb! I am glad to see you. Please come into my tent. I am most anxious to hear your report."
"You have a splendid tent, your Excellency. It matches the cavern walls well.
"I am most pleased to report that your plan is going quite well. I think we are doing great harm to the Satanic Americans, and they don't even realize it yet."
"So, all over America, millions of people are wasting there time blogging?"
"Indeed, sir. I don't think we'll need to go to all that trouble hijacking airplanes and flying them into buildings any more. Our sources in the Department of Labor report that American productivity is already down 25%. You wouldn't believe how many Americans are wasting their time blogging now instead of doing their work. We are pouring agents into their country by the thousands and they don't even notice; they're so busy posting silly pictures to their blog sites."
"Excellent! Better than I hoped. Those Americans are so soft and self-indulgent and self-centered. How about their family lives?"
"Breaking apart, just as you predicted. Husbands are neglecting wives, wives are neglecting husbands, posting provocative comments to strange men, children are running their own blogs and agreeing to meet strangers at cafes and behind school playgrounds."
[Rubbing hands] "And our agents, are they provoking flame wars and arguments from one end of the country to the other?"
"Absolutely, one provocative message about abortion or gun control and their foaming at their keyboards for hours."
"R'sd B'mb, you have done very well. I have no doubt that the number of virgins allotted to you in Heaven has been doubled. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to the video camera and finish my tape for the next we're sending to Al Jazeera next week."
"Thank you, Osama, it is indeed a pleasure to serve under you."


Comments: 15
Now what to do about the crumbling of our family traditions - that is another story. Have we all become too busy to converse with family, friends and neighbors? Has television and the Internet placated our need to be more social?
Instead, look within: American government since Bush 2000 has been depressing: a failing war, a free terrorist, sexual abuse allegations, excessive abuse of powers and a ridiculous excuse to undermine the judicial process with warrantless searches. There are no apologies, only fear bating: "terrorists want to kill us - now, give us your loyalty or die".
2008 couldnt get here any faster, although it has been somewhat a relief that Democracts have taken over: surely that should indicate the way Americans feed.
Rock on, Bush!
I for one, am *choke* Oh, man. Sorry, I just can't keep a straight face.
I also believe in Santa, The Tooth Fairy and that you are a real person and not some Random Name. ;-P
If so then I guess my brain has been hijacked by those pesky Terrorists!!!!
Interesting ... very interesting, do you like my monocle ... lol.
Now, now dear sir how could you even suggest that the citizens of this fine and moral country could stoop to using their employer's time to play on the Internet ... well I for one am LMAO.
Boy do you have America's problems pegged! No accountability, responsibility, common sense or sense of honesty and fair play. Major issues for many of the population. Feed them a story they will eat it up like candy, give them an opinion they will embrace it as fact. It is a hard and cruel world and everyone wants to pass the buck to someone else.
Again I say ... welcome to Gather, hope you found a place to hang your hat and coat -- with any luck you'll hang around for a while.