I yearn for the pre-dawn, this steamy night; I yearn for the hush, that momentary moment of quiet between gray-scale and the rosy fingers of dawn, slipping over the horizon.
The chickadee chirps his mating call, "Phoebe, Phoebe, Phoebe" and he finds a mating call returned. "Chickadee dee dee dee". The robin stands so proud and tall, as it listens for worms as the pre-dawn slides into dawn.
Some mornings, I peek out the window, letting in the cool, cool air after a pea-soup afternoon of smoggy, thick, green air and a steamy night in this early summer heat wave.
The dawn beckons me, calls me to her side; she welcomes me to her world - her world is the world of new beginnings, where every morning is brand new, pink and cool, like a tulip opening for the first time, like a baby smiling for the first time, like the first moment a lover's lips touch.
I yearn for the pre-dawn, this steamy night; I yearn for the hush, that momentary moment of quiet between gray-scale and dawn's cool promise.
As I settle down to sleep this steamy night, I only hope to find dawn's promise tomorrow when I look out my window, as the cool, cool air washes over me.


Comments: 66
Two small little items to nitpick: one is a typo (in the second paragraph "... and her finds..." clearly meant to be "...and he finds..."); the other is in the first paragraph, the use of "momentary moment" together. Too repetitive. One of those could be replaced with a different word.
However, the over all sense of the piece is very real and tangible.
"where every morning is brand new, pink and cool, like a tulip opening for the first time, like a baby smiling for the first time, like the first moment a lover's lips touch."
that's priceless !!!!!
I enjoyed reading your piece of poetry. In fine tuning to express your sense of thought. Thank-you for sharing and best of wishes...
cool my neck and lift
the mosquitoes from my back
rbs
thanks all for enjoying this...hope you can enjoy the dawn and the pre-dawn.
This morning, there was no rosy fingers of dawn....I can hope for next week.
My most vivid encounters with this phenomenom have been in the desert.
This morning was not one of them.
thanks all
It's been a while, but I don't think my 7th grade teacher would have liked the way you used semicolons.
I've been to LA and I never saw green air.
Something I noticed is how much the word dawn comes up. It may be better to switch some of them out for analogies.
Also:
"The chickadee chirps his mating call, "Phoebe, Phoebe, Phoebe" and he finds a mating call returned. "Chickadee dee dee dee". The robin stands so proud and tall, as it listens for worms as the pre-dawn slides into dawn."
>>> I think the repetition of "as" takes away from the meaning. Something more like 'The robin stands so proud and tall, as it listens for worms, pre-dawn sliding into dawn.'
Ah Leonard, you work at night, don't you...I've switched to early morning...I hope for a beautiful dawn tomorrow. If I find it, I will photograph it.
thanks all.