Laughing Through Adversity

“Don’t go through life, grow through life.”  ~Eric Butterworth

I find this quote very inspiring.  In order to accomplish our dreams we must grow.  I also learned this from a close friend. When we first met, I felt she was immature.  No matter what happened to her, she laughed about it.  She was always making jokes about the “bad” in her life.  As I began to know her better, I realized it was her way of dealing with the pain.  As we became better friends I began to understand just how special she was and just how much her laughing would change my life.

She dated a man she loved, but was not in love with. They married and had beautiful twin girls.  It wasn’t long after, that bruises began showing up.  She would joke away the questions, not ready for help. He moved the family far away from any support system, her family and friends.  She no longer worked and was now a full-time stay at home mom. As things progressed the bruises and fighting became worse. She became more open with friends and family, yet still joking, about what was happening.

As we all felt would come the day finally arrived when he pushed her past her limit.  He punched her in the chest and tried to kick her in the kidney, the only one she was born with, in front of their crying girls.  She knew she had to do something.  She called her family who immediately called the authorities.  While he was busy verbally abusing his parents, she snuck out of the house with their girls and fled. 

She returned to her support system.  Yet, she was changed.  She was ashamed, beaten down, and constantly worrying if she made the right decision.  This combined with the death of her father caused her much grief and pain.  She turned to the two things she knew would take the edge off, wine and laughter. Wine soon became the enemy.  Her drinking was out of control and threatened not only her life but also the quality of time she spent with her girls.

At the moment it may not seem apparent why I consider her an inspiration to me.  Let me tell you.  She found the courage to protect herself and her children, which inspired me to write several articles on Domestic Violence, hopefully helping others. She also has gotten help for her drinking and has been sober for several months.  Most importantly she looked every situation in the face and found the humor.  She was able to laugh when everyone else would have cried. This has inspired me more than anything. 

When I was going through hard times she was there for me, helping me find the laughter, helping me to laugh at the absurdity of the pain. So, that I could move on and grow. Laughter is truly the best medicine and I know it’s what helps us through adversity and what keeps us sane.

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