Everyone has someone in their life suffers from painful psych symptoms such as mood swings, depression, constant worry--but wouldn't be caught dead in a therapist's or psychiatrist's office.
Of course, if that person is an addict, they may be forced into treatment by determined family members through an intervention (or by legal compulsion, if they're unlucky). But others, particularly those who suffer from chronic depression or anxiety, can be too tired, upset or just plain uncomfortable to get mental health treatment.
Perhaps this will sound strange to some readers, but I'm a huge therapy fan and mostly enjoy my weekly visits. I love having someone to vent to without having to feel I'm being inconsiderate, and I get a lot out of looking at how I function. Hell, sometimes I'm just grateful for a chance to put aside being a frenzied mommy and sit for an hour shooting the breeze with someone who gives a damn. It can be very restful.
But at least a few people in my life are dead-set against receiving counseling, including my hubby, my brother and my dad, each of whom, I'm pretty sure, would benefit from putting down that airline carousel's worth of baggage. (Not that I'm not still carrying a bunch of cases myself!) But each of them are out of the game, largely because they share an aversion for sharing themselves with strangers or honestly, even opening up to close friends and family.
I know this isn't exclusively a guy thing--sure, some women won't go into therapy or take psych meds either--but it's pretty darned close. And I'd bet big bucks that it's all about standard male enculturation (even in the case of my feminist husband).
Sad to see that we're still doing this kind of damage to the psyches of men, making them terribly afraid to share and process their feelings. I hope my two sons grow up more comfortable with their inner lives--and can find the words to share them.
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Comments: 16
If you are not getting better or unhappy with the therapist, you can always change.
Anti-depressants have literally saved my life. I am much, much happier now than I have ever been. Depression is an illness just like diabetes or high blood pressure and if one needs meds there is absolutely nothing wrong in taking it. The meds have to be monitored and regulated by a mental health professional.
I have not suffered from a serious sid e effect. Have you been on any psych. meds.
Remember, "depression is a defect in your chemicals in your brain, it is not a defect in ones character." A.Z., I agree with you, therapy is wonderful, especially when its helping you. I also find that most guys do not like therapy because they cannot open up and share their feelings. They think only "sissies" do that. Too bad! Lot's of luck, A.Z., I am very proud of you!
As far as drugs are concerned, making a person who continues to fail feel happy is an abuse. A world of "happy" crazy people is not a solution to anything. "Crazy" people who achieve success in innovative tangible accomplishments are ones lovingly guided to explicit realistic support, not unconditional approval for any positive attempt at actualizing a creative thought.
There are extremes to the debate: overuse of euphemisms can sometimes be harmful. The use of the term "crazy" is simply satirical exageration to counteract the utopian idea that everything is relative. If I would be "Asperger Syndrome" would any person in the real world excuse my insensitivity? At best, they might say, "another eccentric" if successful, and just "a bum" if unsuccessful.
Yes, there are therapists that are not good, just as there are doctors who are in the same category, but we still go to them when we are sick. Physically ill, i mean,
not mentally ill, heaven forbid.
Many times it takes a long time before there is any sign of "getting better." But, its worth the try. If you don't like the therapist, you can try another.
Lot's of luck everyone!
i sometimes feel very skeptic about the use of therapy, i think that if the churches and other religious institutions were working one could talk to a priest or a rabbi for free however in our world listening costs..
the benefit of therapy is that it helps put order in an other wise overloaded world and if it eases the stress of everyday i would say save on something else.
i go, am very skeptic but as other beliefs , sometimes i prefer to take a chance there is than decide there is not, in this case a benefit in therapy,
it can not really hurt unless you go to a bad one, and if there is a chance it can help why not?
There are institutions in NY and I am sure in other states where one can get therapy for free. In my neighborhood, you can get therapy sessions for free or next to nothing if your income is very low. The Jewish Federation is one of these places and also Ohel in brooklyn. The government also gives people who are on medicaid free sessions with therapists.
There are no instant results with therapy, it takes a long time to have an effect, but its better than speaking to people who spread all your troubles around to anyone who wishes to listen. It takes a long time to change, if one wants to, you just need the right person just like you need the right doctor.
As for drugs, and depression being a disease, I think that's the bill of goods the pharmaceutical industry would really like us all to buy. For an alternative viewpoint, I recommend the writings of Peter Breggin, including Your Drug May Be Your Problem. I myself was told that I would never be able to stop taking SSRI antidepressants, due to my long history of depression . . .and yet, here I am, off them, and functional. I wonder how many people believe what they are told, and put up with the horrifying side effects of these meds . . . and who also don't realize that the detox from them discourages people from getting off them, because it is frightening (and that, in my cynical moments, I think is deliberate, to keep people dependent).
what everyone should do about therapy. I have a
name for these types of people, 'Wanna Be's' that's
the short & tall of it! Sorry if I've stepped on anyone's
toes, but these people who write in for some sort of
help don't want to hear condescending remarks. And
'your experience' with drugs, is yours not theirs. And
'zero' response to poetry is no concern here at all! I
am sure a few of these comments made were not
what this person A.Z. wanted to be reading. Forgive
them A.Z., and you will be the far better person.