Money ~ A Short Travel Tale Of The Absurd

from a June 2003 trip

As a general rule I do not change money at airports, unless there is an ATM machine and I can pull out enough local currency to get me where I need to go. I usually do it later, after I am settled in my lodgings, wherever they may be.

Yesterday evening was no different. But I faced two problems with Uzbek money. One, there is a large discrepancy between what the black market pays for dollars and what the 'Official' rate is. Currently it's about a 20% difference. The official rate is 900 plus or minus a few sum, as they call it here in Uzbekistan. The black market rate is about 1150 to the dollar. The other problem is it's illegal to pay for goods and services in foreign currencies, dollars included. Of course, most people pay in dollars, or at least want to be paid in dollars, my cabby was no exception. I hope I don't get arrested (snicker, laugh, wink).

But I digress from the anecdote.

After arriving at the hotel I enquired as to the exchange rate. It was reasonable so I changed a $20 bill knowing I'd go search out a better rate tomorrow. (Yes, I am extremely diligent about money changers.) I assumed  that would hold me over until I found other means (snicker, laugh, wink).

So, I gave the girl in the exchange window a twenty and she gave me back an EIGHT INCH THICK WAD OF CASH!

"WTF," I think to myself. I know it is terribly rude to laugh about something like this out loud but I couldn't help myself.

My Indian friend from earlier came up to me and asked what was so funny and I waved the WAD at her and started laughing again.

"It's kind of like Weimar Germany here, huh?"

"Well, yes and no," she said, "that'll take you a long ways but it is too much cash. You'd think they could print some bigger bills.

"How am I supposed to carry this around with me? Good GOD! Had I exchanged a hundred I'd have needed a wheelbarrow," I said as we both laughed.

Here's the kicker: how do the moneychangers do it? I mean they've got to carry around a lot of cash and keep it a SECRET! Cause you know, it is illegal to carry around foreign money if you're unregistered.

Strange country. Strange ways.