Sometimes I wonder what "growing up" really means. There are days when I think I have "grown up" and days that I feel I may be lacking in maturity. But maturity is not the same as having a youthful nature and there are days that I feel youthful and mature.
I also wonder when we stop having dreams. Not the dreams of the night, but the day dreams of more and richer experiences. I know that I will eventually run out of time and the desire to do even more with my life is what keeps me awake the most in the middle of the night. At fifty, I am working a job doing what I love. But I still dream of doing more. Here are the things I want to do before I die:
- See all four grandchildren from the eleven year old all the way down to the one year old happily grown
- See a few great grandchildren.
- Own my own small alpaca farm.
- Grow my own food and raise chickens for eggs.
- Learn to spin and weave the fleece from my alpacas.
- Travel to Tibet, Tuscany, China and Peru.
- Teach Tai Chi/Qi Gong to others.
- Publish a book and have it sell reasonably well.
- Sell a few paintings.
- Learn to play the violin or oboe.
- See the Red Sox win another World Series.
- Sincerely practice Buddhism and be a force for peace in my little corner of the world.
- Be financially secure. Not necessarily rich, but not have to worry so much.
- Learn to ride a motorcycle, but buy a Vespa (a red one).
- Have a purple kayak and paddle all the lakes in New Hampshire.
- Grow my hair down to my waist and wear it in gray pigtails while I work in the garden.
- Build something with my own two hands – i.e. a small cabin for meditation and writing.
- Make each of my grandchildren a quilt.
I wonder if women in the generations before me had dreams like these at my age or did their circumstances smother their creativity before it had a chance to bloom. Are my dreams the result of the times in which we live, opportunities abounding everywhere for women of all ages who choose to take the steps to be their own person? Sometimes I overwhelm myself. I learned a long time ago that we can have it all, just not all at once. However, it takes planning and willingness. It also takes patience and the ability to see the opportunities as they appear. And it also takes time. Do I have enough time in this life?
What are your dreams?
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Comments: 22
My greatest dream, the only one to which I am fully committed, is to make people aware that there is only one way to bring peace to the world, one way that will work everywhere for all people of all cultures and religions. To do that I have to convinced a lot of people that hope alone won't do it, nor will leaving it to someone else.
Quilting? Playing the violin? Growing food? These are things you can do. So do them.
I don't know your age, but I am 54, and I find the challenge is in getting beyong the "someday" attitude about things.
Someday is getting shorter, so you need to do what you can today.
(Note to self: Take your own advice, girl!)
I love your commitment, Bill. You have a hard row to hoe, but hopefully will make headway.
My two biggest dreams are to trave more (take cooking classes in Italy) and to take photography classes. I'd like to get my masters degree but that's on hold till I have the time to put into it.
thank you
To compile a book of my poetry and find someone to actually publish it.
To have some of my song lyrics set to music so that I can send out some demos. (actually have ONE in the works now...:)
To go storm chasing in the midwest.
To begin to LOVE working out....lol
To begin to LOVE healthy food instead of junk food.
To see my children have children one day so I can spoil them to death.
To finish my teenage novel....and have it actually be good.
To have a cottage overlooking the ocean where I can write.
To be totally independent.
I hope growing up doesn't mean not having new dreams to fill.
May I go to Tibet with you? I think we'd get along just fine!