Bad Dates, Babysitters & Boardrooms: Role-Playing Beyond the Oscars

It’s awards season. Which means in addition to ogling George Clooney in a tux, we face that same old question, “Exactly what is it that makes for greatness when it comes to acting?” Is it the acting or the role?

For me, great acting is the ability to play against type: Renee Zellweger, a small-town Texan playing a manipulative showgirl/jailbird, or a ditzy English book publicist; and Yale-educated, Edward Norton playing a skinhead, psycho killer, drug addict or yuppie pugilist. (Having gone to high school with Edward, trust me, this is completely against type.) But for the rest of the world, in order to pull off an Oscar-worthy performance, one has to pick the right role. (Note to Kevin Costner: Stick with the over-the-hill baseball players.)

While I could discourse for hours on which actors should play which roles, and often do with my friends C and M, it’s always much harder to analyze the real life roles we all play. Does anyone besides me ever feel that they’re play-acting their way through a job or a relationship? For some reason, it’s easier to say to a friend (or an aging Hollywood action hero), “That role is just not working for you, time to move on.” (Note to Arnold: When we wanted you to try something new, we didn’t mean politics!) But when it comes to our own performances, picking our own best roles is much more difficult.

Looking back, just as I question some of my past fashion choices (gauchos, legwarmers, shoulder pads, to name just a few), the reviews that my own performances might have garnered make me wonder, “What was I thinking when I accepted that role?”

“Law student/litigator. Definitely a thumbs-down performance for Diane. While adequately credentialed and willing to put her nose to the grindstone, this young actor showed no passion or interest in anything other than the security of a paycheck (and the occasional writing assignment). Recognizing that everybody needs a paycheck to pay for their passions (how else to explain Robert Redford in “Spy Game” and “Legal Eagles”), this ingénue needs to learn to combine the paycheck with the passion.”
- Bill Morehours, The Legal Times

“Desperate housewife. Despite the attractive scenery and the Martha Stewart-worthy set decoration, this was another weak effort where the actor was clearly uncomfortable with the genre and completely unprepared for the role. Scene-stealing 16 year-old dog only thing worth watching.”
- B.A. Goodwife, The Stepford Sun

“Marketing executive. New role, new energy. Having taken a major detour from earlier roles, Diane seems to finally be showing some promise over this extended run. Her performance in the past few seasons, however, is reminiscent of that other Diane in Baby Boom, only with a twist – character has baby, gets divorced, moves back to city and takes bigger, more challenging job. Interesting choice, but not sure it’s sustainable in the long run.”
- Glass C. Ling, Corporate America Standard

“Entrepreneur/Writer/Speaker. Having crashed and burned out in her previous role, and despite being elderly by Hollywood standards, this actor is finally coming into her own. In fact, she doesn’t even appear to be acting most of the time. Perhaps this is because she benefits from working with an extraordinary supporting cast of characters, including a hilarious breakout performance by her 7-year old son.”
- Blaise A. Newpath, Reinvention Magazine

It’s taken me some time, but I finally figured out that I’m a terrible actor and it’s difficult for me to play against type. Still, sometimes it’s hard to know our own type, especially if we’ve spent years taking direction and reading from scripts written and given to us by others. We all need to learn to trust our own judgment and pick our own material. And while I might not make the best choices all the time, at least it no longer feels like acting.

Bad Dates, Babysitters & Boardrooms thought for the week:  The next time you get a bad review, instead of brushing up on your acting skills, why not reexamine the role you’re trying to play. Maybe it’s no longer working for you and it’s time to move on. To what, I can’t tell you, but I do know that somewhere out there everyone has a role they were born to play.

P.S. While it’s not the Oscars, I may get my chance at a podium as the Downtown Women's Club social network, DWC Faces, is up for a 2006 Stevie Award  for best new service for women in business.  We’ll find out if I get to finally give an acceptance speech on March 2^nd in NYC.  But, as they all say, it’s such an honor just to be nominated.  Yeah right, tell that to Bill Murray and Eddie Murphy.

Diane K. Danielson is the ceo and founder of the Downtown Women's Club, a social network and career website for businesswomen with chapters in 10 cities.  More of her random musings can be found on the DowntownWomensClub.com blogs - the WomensDISH, and Books & Stuff.