TIME FOR SOME GIGGLES

Here's some blonde jokes that were sent to me. Hope you enjoy especially if you're blonde.

Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in movie?

They went to see "Closed for the Winter."

Why did the blonde resolve to have only 3 children? She heard that one

out of every four children born in the world was Chinese.

Did you hear about the near-tragedy at the mall?

There was a power outage, and twelve blondes were stuck on

the escalators for over four hours.

A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught in a really bad

hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it

to a repair shop The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided

to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow into the tail

pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out. So, the blonde went

home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her

tailpipe. Nothing happened. So she blew a little harder, and still

nothing happened. Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said,

"What are you doing?" The first blonde told her how the repairman had

instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents

to pop out. The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Uh, like hello! You

need to roll up the windows first."

A blonde went to an eye doctor to have her eyes checked for glasses.

The doctor directed her to read various letters with the left eye while

covering the right eye. The blonde was so mixed up on which eye was

which that the eye doctor, in disgust, took a paper lunch bag with a

hole to see through, covered up the appropriate eye and asked her to

read the letters. As he did so, he noticed the blonde had tears

streaming down her face. "Look," said the doctor, "there's no need to

get emotional about getting glasses." "I know," agreed the blonde, "But

I kind of had my heart set on wire frames.

A blonde was shopping at a Walmart Store and came across a silver

thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and brought

it over to the clerk to ask what it was. The clerk said, "That's a

thermos . . . it keeps some things hot and some things cold" "Wow, said

the blonde, "that's amazing. I'm going to buy it!" So she bought the

thermos and took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on her desk.

"What do you have there?" he asked.

"Why, that's a thermos . it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,"

she replied.

Her boss inquired, "What do you have in it? "

The blond replied, "Two Popsicles, and some coffee".

A man entered the bus with both of his front pockets full of golf balls,

and sat down next to a beautiful (you guessed it) blonde. The puzzled

blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets.

Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls".

Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him thoughtfully

and finally, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer,

asked, "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?"

A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife, Susie,

something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decided to buy

her a cell phone.? He showed her the phone and explained to her all of

its features? Susie was excited to receive the gift and simply adored

her new phone. The next day Susie went shopping. Her phone rang and, to

her astonishment, it was her husband on the other end.? "Hi Susie,"

he said, "how do you like your new phone?" Susie replied, "I just

love it! It's so small and your voice is clear as a bell, but there's

one thing I don't understand though..." "What's that, sweetie?" asked

her husband. "How did you know I was at Wal-mart?"

Feel free to add any jokes of your own in the comments. Of course, with the "new gather" probably very few will read this.