I am the mother of 5 grown children. Incredibly I learned some of my mothering skills from my animals.
I loved being a mom. Oh, I remember the exhausting nights with fussy babies or sick children and the frustrating days of toys scattered all over the house....and the potty training. I always dreaded that. I am not really a terribly patient person. But my love for my children changed me and made me into a better person.
I have always tried to learn from the good examples of others...even from my pets. For example patience and devotion was reinforced to me by my cat. She had recently had a litter and was the most devoted mother I have ever seen. She only left those kittens for brief periods of time and even then only for necessities like using the litter box and eating. Then she was right back with them , nursing them, listening to their cries, cleaning and teaching them. I thought, I could certainly apply some of her devotion to my mothering...and I did. She made me a better mother.
Then there were the teenage years. I learned better mothering of teenagers from my experience with horses. Horses are wonderful, beautiful animals. But they have to know who is in control and it has to be you! If you aren't a horse can hurt you or at the least make dealing with him/her a miserable experience which parallels the misery and heartache our children can put us through.
What I learned is that despite a horse's size and strength they can be managed with a minimum of force. You just have to use the amount needed to get the horse to do what you want. After that you can praise and pet him.
With children and teenagers that translates to standing your ground and insisiting on obedience. If that does not happen some form of unpleasant correction needs to be applied. With a horse it would be the sting from a crop, a spur in the side or a yank on the halter, always humanely but firmly applied.
Whatever correction you use must always be paired with love and reconcilation. It is that relationship that must always be nurtured and maintained.
In all of this you must be consistent or you will have a difficult, confused horse or.... child.
Keep in mind it takes force to create a beautiful diamond. Also much tending and attention is required for a lovely garden to grow. Left to itself it will only go wild and be fruitless.
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