Top Ten WORST Christmas Gifts - #5

When you give a gift to someone you care about, it should be an expression of your thoughtfulness...to reflect on the way you feel about that person.  Most of us can at least come up with something that adequately conveys our message to them.  It seems like a fairly easy task to do.  Well, that is, if you really know what you're doing in the first place.  There are a few who have well meanings, but it comes out all wrong.  You had good intentions when giving, but the gift wasn't taken in the same way it was hand over.  There are times you just have to sit and shake your head over whatever it was you found inside.  What were they thinking?

You'd have to be very close with the next item on the list.  You may be thinking romance and making love to that special someone, but that's not the way things came across.  There are many ways to say 'I love you'...flowers, candy, jewelery, a new outfit.  It's usually the man who makes this kind of mistake.  He wants to let her know, 'Baby, you're the greatest', but it comes out as he's just so insensitive.  He wants to spend a special moment with the one he loves, but he usually ends up breaking that wonderful mood with his dorkiness.  He meant well, but, well, he's not going to get what he expected.  It doesn't take much effort to find a really romantic items.  If you don't know; ask a store clerk, especially one of the same sex you're giving the gift to.  Find out what they'd like to receive if they were in your special someone's shoes.  Don't get what you think will work...because it won't!  Here's another from our list of the WORST Christmas gifts ever...

#5 - K Y Jelly - That's right...a plain, old tube of lubricating gel to enhance your love making experience.  I guarantee it's not going to make the person's heart go pitter pat and it sure won't put a twinkle in their eye.  How sexy is that...and it's already been used, too.  Sorry, dear, the car door was squeaking and this is the only thing I had to use to grease it up.  Granted, this is something that will help your love-making go a little bit smoother, but imagine the horror on everyone's face when it's opened in front of the whole family.  What?  No condoms to go with that, either? At least look for a better decorated bottle.  They have gift sets available now.  There are even K Y colognes and perfumes to use...enhanced with pheromones to spice up your sex life and give you a little extra drive.  By all means, if you're going to be this dumb, don't you dare say a word about the 'extra cushion for the pushin', either, buster...or you won't be getting anything...period. Hand over a gift like this and you may not be prepared for what you find later.  You head off to the bedroom...and there she is...reclined waiting for you...with your gift in hand.  She tells you to hurry up and let's get this over with while she has no makeup on, curlers in her hair and wearing that ratty, old flannel nightgown which she lifts to reveal the sexiest pair of cotton granny panties you never wanted to see. Alright, honey...you've got five minutes...and your time starts now.  By the way, what are you going to do with the extra time I gave you, Mr. Minute Man?  Let me know when you're done.  I'll already be sleeping.  No K Y Jelly for Christmas!

It's getting close to the wire and we're starting to run out of gift suggests to avoid.  Can they get any worse than these?  They sure can!  You ain't seen...or received...nothing yet.  There's more to come, but just hope you're not the one who gets them.