Accused and acquitted killer OJ Simpson says his doctors have recently discovered a brain tumor and he's only got a few months left to live as a result.
That's why the 66-year-old incarcerated football legend apparently wrote to the White House for a presidential pardon, telling Obama that he doesn't want to die in some dreadful jail cell just like "prison scum" but at home surrounded by family and friends.
"Mr. President, I know my life is coming to an end. Please, don't let me die in prison," he supposedly penned in yet one more desperate bid for freedom.
Simpson is currently doing a 33-year stint behind bars on robbery and kidnapping charges. He wouldn't be eligible for parole for at least another three years, by which time, he claims, he'll be long gone.
The fright of brain cancer and imminent death has also prompted a moment of truth, according to his jail mates.
They claim, because OJ Simpson steadfastly believes he is now dying, that he angrily confessed to the brutal 1995 slaying of his ex-wife Nicole Brown and her doomed friend Ronald Goldman.
If he did it, however, don't expect any show of remorse and contrition, because those same sources also state that he told them he'd "do it again" if he had the chance.
So maybe there really is something wrong with Simpson's head.
EPONYMOUS ROX - image via CNN