A couple of oldies that have been on my computer for years.
Your Patriotic Duty
As You May Already Know, It Is A Sin For A Taliban Male To See Any Woman Other Than His Wife Naked And He Must Commit Suicide If He Does.
So This Saturday At 4 P.m. Eastern Time, All American Women Are Asked To Walk Out Of Their House Completely Naked To Help Weed Out Any Neighborhood Terrorists.
Circling Your Block For One Hour Is Recommended.
For This Anti-terrorist Effort, All Men Are To Position Themselves In Lawn Chairs In Front Of Their House To Prove They Are Not Taliban, And To Demonstrate They Think It's Okay To See Nude Women Other Than Their Wife And To Show Support For All American Women.
Since The Taliban Also Does Not Approve Of Alcohol, A Cold 6-pack At Your Side Is Further Proof Of Your Anti-taliban Sentiment.
The American Government Appreciates Your Efforts To Root Out Terrorists And Applauds Your Participation In This Anti-terrorist Activity. God Bless America!
It Is Your Patriotic Duty To Pass This On.
The government today announced that it is changing its emblem from an Eagle to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government's Political stance.
A condom allows for inflation, halts production, Destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you're actually being screwed.
Damn, it just doesn't get more accurate than that!