Meeting a Psychopath

That must have been a cool lecture. I don't feel any need to "meet a psychopath," as I think they are much more common in society than we expect. And, of course I grew up with one. (But my brother's on the mild side of the scale, at least as adult).

I hear you, Ann. It must be quite a challenge living with a brother even on the mild side of the scale of psychopathy.

For me, meeting the hit man at the bus stop was not planned or invited, but it was a challenge for me as a newly minted Buddhist. :)

I'm older than my brother by nearly two years, so I could overpower him until he reached adolescence. Things were not too pleasant after that, but the rest of us survived (safety in numbers-- there are 8 in my nuclear family).

What an incredible experience, and how difficult to imagine. I wonder if you ever write about it. I see a short story, maybe. Knowing how art sometimes helps ...

It would make a good short story, but one would have to give it a humorous spin to make it palatable, and I'm not much of a humorist.

Oh, I don't know about the humor. I was thinking more that the story could be cathartic in some way. I find that writing about traumatic events in third person sometimes helps me get some emotional distance. And as one of my writing coaches used to say, "In your pain is your best part."

Quite the story, Stirling.

(I, too, grew up well acquainted with a psychopath.)

Yes, I believe you are right, Ann, there are many disguised, walking among us.

Wonderful 'review,' and nice piece of writing. I like that you gave up your book when you saw that it could be more useful to someone else. You can always go buy another copy, but it is unlikely he would have gone out to buy it. Hopefully, it will help him find something to do that he would be proud to tell his daughter about.

I watched Dexter twice. The fact that he methodically planned and took pleasure in killing someone was too much for me. One of my sisters who doesn't miss an episode explained that Dexter is ridding the world of some of its vermin, people that are hated and don't deserve to live. My problem with this is that to make such a decision is to play God. Perhaps in certain instances a person has the right, maybe even the need, to play God, but I'd be afraid that could lead to wanting to be God.

Thanks for reading - and for your compliments. It's interesting what you say about Dexter. The whole third season was devoted to exploring what Dexter's personal views might have been about God. In an earlier season Dexter was forced to go to addiction anonymous and admit he was powerless to control his addiction. It's an ongoing theme ... and I am fascinated with the way Michael C. Hall (and the writers) explore the character of someone with this kind of addiction trying to "manage" it by killing only evildoers. Like you say ... not easy to take.

In my novel "The Nightwing's Quest" I had a character (Prince Mischa) who as addicted to watching people fight. It was almost the same kind of thing - that rush of adrenalin. And he manipulated the games using magic toys. In the end, he had to use magic to save the world, which was not what he had in mind, I'm sure ...

The hair on the back of my neck goes up when in the presence of a wild cougar or a grizzly (within either's comfort, killing zone)...and in the presence of a psychopath. If a psychopath is particularly twisted I get nausious.

I cannot imagine having a tv series about a psychopath for the education of psychopaths.

Oh, William, I had not thought of it that way! Since psychopaths are in the minority (according to Kevin Dutton who has studied them), hopefully that is not the purpose of the tv series. More so, I think, it is an exploration of conscience and character - and what it means to be human. And hopefully, such insights inspired by seeing this play out in a drama on the screen will help all of us to be better in our interactions with each other in the real world.

Did you know that a rabbit being killed sounds like a baby squalling? Bad enough that a psychopath twisted the heads off of his daughter's two pet rabbits after he had locked them all together in the bathroom.

Playing around with the conscience in the virtual reality world of a tv series is not the occupation of writers without Biblical absolutes. As well meaning as Friedrich Nietzsche was...he twisted & confused absolutes could not be trusted to save himself from insanity. Nor his radically messed up absolutes prevent helping to produce WWI & WWII. HIS Germany!

Humans have made plays to act out their darkest fantasies since time immemorial. Better to mimic on a stage than to do it in real life. Thus we bring such urges into the light where they can be understood and thus exposed, lose their power over us.

As for writers and artists, they often portray the longings and fears of the society around them. And in a modern morality play such as "Dexter" the writers may actually be the conscience of society in a way. Just things to ponder, William.

I appreciate your point, too. There are certainly enough horrors in real life not to imagine more.

I am just saying that when it comes to "correcting" conscience (if that is the actual purpose of "Dexter") those trying to do the correcting had better know what they are doing. In Africa kids use American Gangster-rap to exercize gun & blade with enough enthusiasm. I found this out from our adopted granddaughter out of Liberia who had passed through such bloodshed.

In my own writing I use what I call "Redemption". By nature I write Darkness. When I was a teen my mother offered to pay me to write a something without that terrible darkness. I could not. When I became a Christian that changed as the Light of Redemption came into my tormented world. But I still write the Darkness the best...but now I will not rest until the darkness in my writing has been converted into LIGHT. That is actually how I came to love Narrative Poetry...sometimes it took three generations to completely convert into LIGHT.

A tv series Grooms behavior. Those producing tv know this. For instance, ABC (pretty much the only station I watch) is actively trying to groom Americans concerning homosexuality. I have not seen Dexter but I do know that tv program is actively "grooming" folks. Not just releasing horrible impulses, if Dexter is a psychopath. Scarey stuff. I hope it is not like some "going bad" video game.

I relate to what you're saying, William. To hopefully allay your concerns, the show "Dexter" explores the redeeming possibilities of someone with a terrible addiction. It is always turning darkness to light. There is no didactic purpose to the show, however. It is pure fiction. I think good fiction (as yours probably is) makes us question our own motivations and makes us better through insight. If the show were not so good at this, I'm sure it would not be popular. In other words, it is not a mindless, slasher film for people looking for thrills. It's an intelligent exploration of human nature.

I may have to leave my comfort zone and check "Dexter" out.

Thanks for reading. Enjoyable conversation.

My son and I started watching Dexter several years ago - he was a young teen at the time. It was good for us, because as the show explored aspects of sociopathology, we were able to discuss it. My major was psychology when I graduated college, and I worked in the field for some time.
I'm not a big label Christian by any means, what with all my faults and liberal thoughts - hahaha - but, I do believe there is evil in the world, just as there is darkness - and it is only known because there is also good.

With the character of Dexter, we saw how he could have grown up to be another Ted Bundy - instead, he channeled the impulses into doing away with those who hurt others. I'm not saying it's right - but it was how he was able to fit in to society and deal with his impulses simultaneously. Working as a blood spatter expert for the police department was almost a natural for him.

How interesting that you found a way to turn the psychological drama into a teaching tool for good with your son. I am really impressed by that. I do think parenting is one of the hardest jobs in the world, and hats off to someone who obviously is great at it. ;)

I hope I never meet one. It is scary to think that there may be one living right in my neighborhood.

Yipes. I hope you never meet that one, too.

I am just stopping by once again to let you know that this post is spotlighted in the

What Is Happening Today on Gather ~ Thursday November 08, 2012

Make sure to stop by and see how I spotlighted your post. I hope you will have time to check out the other spotlighted posts as well.

Thank you very much, Connie!

I rarely have occasion to use buses, but will certainly be careful when I do!!

Well, I have to say - this was a very unusual experience! In my 40 years or so of using buses, most of the time you can meet some very nice people. You would have never imagined this guy for a hitman, by the way. He looked sort of like a young Clive Owen, in pressed jeans and a white shirt. I think it's sort of axiomatic that you can never judge a book by its cover. Trains, planes and buses - all humanity is cheek to jowl. :)

Yes, you wanted to share a message with Michael, yet he is just the actor... it wouldn't have the same effect as it might with the true life hit-man...

Thanks for the insightful comment, Karen. So true. My thought in wanting to share with Michael C. Hall was that real life experiences fuel an actor's ability to portray a character. But I forgot that although we can share narratives of our experiences, it's not the same as actually living it.

Interesting lecture. I have missed the episodes of Dexter.

Michele, the Rubin Museum is doing some really interesting things. I wish I lived in NYC and I would take advantage of more of them. I'm sure they chose to do the interview with Michael C. Hall because Dexter is such an enormously popular show. But from a Buddhist perspective, the dialogue might have gone a bit further. Anyway, it was a good try.

It sounds like quite a bit of fun. I hope you get to attend more!

Boy oh boy, there's one of the great spiritual connundrums from my perspective.

You start with the human condition and its vast misery. It puts you on a spiritual journey. You find "spiritual fearlessness" and through meditation become a psychopath.

Or maybe not quite, but the dividing line is not always easily discernible.

Then again, paradox is a good indication you're on the right track.

Wuh? Only kidding. Your comment made me think. Still not quite figuring out what you meant - that I am turning into a psychopath because I like to watch "Dexter" on TV? Or that my gift of Buddha's sayings has somehow had the opposite effect on the hitman? LOL

Anyway, thanks, Charles. Paradox is indeed a good place to start.

"It doesn't reward. It doesn't punish. It just is." George Carlin.

The brilliance of George. :)

Talking about "The big electron"

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Yes!!! Just went and watched it again.

Like, for example, I've been on the global warming band wagon since the Jimmy Carter administration. Would an enlightened Buddhist be concerned with global warming?

I think being Buddhist means trying to live life being aware of how ones' actions affect others. So, yes, I think a really enlightened person would be concerned about global warming. Also a Buddhist needs a perspective that includes lifetimes.

I think I have read that scientists warned about the dangers of mega-industrialization and its effects on the environment in the late 19th century. In my case, my father was working for GE in the power industry when I was growing up in the 60s. We discussed at the dinner table so I was tuned into this issue back then. Over the decades can't seem to understand why business didn't heed the warnings. Seems like it would have been in their own best interest. But it looks like they are not taking the long view.

What a fascinating blog post Stirling. I have a brother who falls into the psychopathic category. Very sad. I'm quite sure he is in prison somewhere. I have not seen him in more than twenty years. Many attempts were made over the years to "contact" him on a real emotional level. But I never saw any real compassion in anything he did. I want to believe there is hope for everyone. If not in their present lives, then perhaps in a future one. That is, at least, a wish for him.

What an incredible encounter with the man on the bus! Seems you got through a little -I wonder if it took at all.

I wonder, too, Atticus. Sorry to hear about you and your brother. It must have been really tough growing up and trying to get through to someone missing that compassion gene. I do think there is hope, but hard to know what the catalyst is, as it is probably as unique as the individuals concerned.

As a Buddhist, I do believe that your brother could possibly work out some karma this lifetime and maybe have a better rebirth in the next. My underlying belief, FWIW, is that everyone (eventually) will become enlightened. It's just a matter of time (no matter how many eons it takes).

I absolutely LOVE the show Dexter and Michael C. Hall.

Did you see him in the show Six Feet Under? Classic!

He is a really intelligent actor. And the writing is top notch.

I am watching Six Feet Under on Netflix show by show - because I missed it on TV.

Agreed!

I got the first season from the local library to watch again. Great stuff!