Bully Family

They do as they see. It is unfortunate. What kills me is tht this has probably happened to him in the pat. I am sure other people have complained to him about his daughter's behavior and he most likely thinks that Kyleigh caused the problem. I think that no matter what you did he would be in denial. He sunds like one of those parents who thinks his daughter is perfect and that U R nuts. I have been there before.

So many crazy people out there.

I went through this many decades ago when two boys stole from me. They were friends of my son and came over to swim in our pool. They took items that belonged to my husband. I rang the bell at one of the boys home and asked the father to get his son. At first he denied it... and I told him, which I had... seen them leave with the bag, he asked me for and found what they had taken was indeed gone.. Then after I spelled it all out, that I knew what was taken and that I saw them on their bikes with the bag of stuff. He said the other boy had the items that were taken and the Father was rude to me as well as the son. He was still involved.

It was sad because while these parents were at work, they were having fun in our pool swimming with my son and I fed them all lunch often. I said to the son, you might not realize it but when you are older and if you are with someone who commits a crime, like today only it's stealing a car instead you can be charged as well. I told him that he might think I'm making a big fuss over nothing but I felt he needed to know this... because he could be in bigger trouble later. He looked to his Dad, I think expecting him to be rude to me again... and the man in a lower calm voice said to his son, "She is 100% right" and not only did the Father apologize to me for what he said to me, but made his son apologize.

When parents do what those parents did to you, and when this father did what he originally did they "forget" they are teaching their child "wrong"...and I think when this father realized what it could lead to, he realized I was right. He thanked me for taking the time to talk to them. I could tell he did not want this to lead to bigger trouble for his son... and indeed it was not just about getting my husbands items back...

When I went to the other boys home and I told his mother what happened she was profusely apologetic and made him go get the items. It was such a different experience. She was horrified about it because of my kindness to her son...

I was pleased the Father listened to me and realized he was sending the wrong message to his son... and that this mother did not treat me like I was in the wrong to try and get my husbands things back.

I did care about these boys...and I didn't want to see them continue the pattern. After I moved to Florida I learned about a teenager in Hudson, Florida who when with two older young men to rob someone's home and one of those older young men killed the man. He had no part in the murder and he is sitting in prison with a life sentence... and he was just "with" them... but that is the law. If someone dies during a crime everyone involved gets charged.

The boys were lucky that you taught them the lesson.

I think parents get on the defensive because they think they have to "defend" their child and there is no defense for poor behavior... and their children get the wrong message. I know someone who bought some stolen coins and gave them to his son.. and warned him not to tell his friends about it... Well guess who broke into a local business and stole stuff and got caught? I often think had he not bought the stolen coins... his son would not think it was okay to be a thief. He started out breaking in neighbors homes and was working his way "up" when he got caught... and I believe that is where it ended. People can't expect their children to do as they say and not as they do... and this true story I share with others because it is a great cautionary tale. I don't think his father ever expected what he did to send a message to his son like that.

SO MANY HORRIBLE PARENTS OUT THERE, IT MAKES ME CRAZY!!!

I know!

that's terrible. who does he think he is that he can call the police for that sort of thing

I don't mind if he called! See who's at fault.

But yeah, it would be a huge waste of tax payer's money.

At least you called his bluff.

He still thinks he wins, because I did "get out of" his face. But no need to waste time with such junk.

I commend you on approaching him about the situation. What poor parenting, a good parent would make ammends and see that their child understood why it was not appropriate to hit another child. Sorry this happened to her and he was such a jerk.

The apple didn't fall far from the tree. Children do what they see their parents doing. On the other hand it was a good lesson for your daughter that there are some parents who are not as considerate as you are.

My coworker suggested that I take Kyleigh to self-defense classes. Maybe I should. :p

That is very upsetting. What a terrible example that man set for his children. I am glad Kyleigh saw you do the right thing in demanding an apology. I shudder to think of those girls' futures.

Actually I am not sure what Kyleigh learned from this incident, because she never got an apology and I walked away when the guy said, "Get out of here." I am a little worried that she thinks we are just weak and pushed-over. But I didn't see any point insisting after he turned nasty. I did tell Kyleigh that both of their behavior was not right. But not sure if that did anything.

I feel like Kyleigh was bullied a lot at school already. Now even in the Disney store. So sad.

Sometimes one has to walk away... people are crazy and who knows what he could have done.. it could have escalated. It was his choice to correct his child and he was not a very good parent... nor consideration for your child.

I was once on a two lane road. My children were in the back of the car and my husband in the passenger side. A car was in the middle of the road. So after a few minutes of waiting...I called out to the two men who were near the car, "could you please move your car, I need to get by"

The one man walked over and told me if I didn't shut the h*ll up he would put the ice pick he had in his pocket through my ear.

When he walked away I was shaking... I made a u-turn and got out of there. (this was before there was cell phones)....

Yea, I backed down... but who knows what would have happened if I didn't... and I pretty much learned... that it may be best to back up and find a different way ... the car being in the middle of the street and knowing the men saw me waiting and didn't do anything should have warned me something was very very wrong.

What my children learned probably was similar to what your daughter learned.. no everyone is nice, fair and considerate. As much as we want our children to learn certain things... sometimes learning there are people who are not nice in the world can help them out too.

The bullying at the school is a different story... you have the school authorities you can go to, to put a stop to that. It should not be happening.

I did have to go to the authorities in the case of two different bullying incident with one of my sons...and it did help. One of the bullies (verbally intimidating) was a teacher who didn't understand that my son was ill and going to different doctors to try to get a diagnosis. The other involved a student who attacked my son in the cafeteria, and my son got blamed. The principal wanted the kids to write out what happened, but my son could barely write, "I hit him" (meaning, in self defense).

Perhaps you could read some bedtime fables with Kyleigh and talk about them. Here is one from Aesop: http://mythfolklore.net/aesopica/milowinter/48.htm

He should not be a parent.

Well said.

There are way to many parents like that.

Sad.

Oh that is just wrong! That is the problem with society is bullying is still happening and I don't feel enough is being done about it. \My daughter who is adhd and odd has been bullyied on the bus. To the point her backpack was broke and her shoe thrown out the bus window.Luckily the kid was suspended but it was just one daya nd the bullying still goes on the bus.

That is horrible!!! :( I am sorry to hear your daughter was treated like that. :(

that was mean,,, I would of gave him the phone and said go for it,, and then have them hit him up abuse toward your daughter

That's crappy. Kids don't know any better if they're not properly taught. It's sad really.

Some people. And I bet you he went away thinking it was you that was the problem.

This reminds me of the festival I went to with the twins and my cousin a couple years back. I was walking one way down the line of tents and vendors with the girls and we stopped to look and buy something. We were all standing there at the side of the tent where you pay waiting for my cousin to put her purchase and wallet back in her bag and there was this couple walking in the opposite direction towards us. I noticed them because they were carrying twins on their chests and the husband was walking one way and the wife was staring at the booths, not watching where she was going and kinda going at an angle right into us. I pulled the twins out of her way, but she walked right into my cousin.

Instead of saying excuse me or sorry or anything she swore at my cousin. My cousin, still putting stuff into her bag and falling into the booth asked her if she was okay-- because my cousin has manners even if she is not in the wrong. I also leaned over to steady the lady because she was wobbly with the baby and she told me to F off. Next thing I know her husband was in our faces cussing us all out and yelling at us like a crazy man. We were kinda just stunned by the whole thing and really shook up by the names and things he was doing.

The twins and my cousin were in tears (and she was 18 then), I was pretty close to breaking down myself and I am not one to cry. I sat them down with the vendor to look over them and politely asked the couple to apologize to the kids and thinking the mother would be more sensible told her that you do not talk to children like that. Well, it turned out that this other couple was with them and both men started screaming in my face and pushing me, called us illegals, pieces of S, and threatening to call the police for harrassment. No one around us did anything and that kinda pissed me off more.

I got really pissed when the other woman kept saying something like, you are so much better than them-- to the crazy couple. It was at that point that I told the husband and wife that is he wanted to treat his wife and kids like S in private, calling them names and screaming at them the way he did to us that was his business but he was not going to do it to us. I called the police, because I had not seen any in the fair around us at that point. The police came, took a statement from us and the vendors and one other guy that stuck around, but they didn't find either couple-- they ran off when I told them I was going to file assault, and then profanity for cussing out the kids and assault on a minor. The officer said they could also charge for assault of a minor because the twins said he got spit all over them when he was screaming in their faces and knocked them into the booth-- which the vendor also said she saw but I wasn't facing them at that point to notice myself.